“Look at that!” I motion to my son, gesturing towards the dilapidated chest-of-drawers on the side of the road. 

“Mom, why do you always like old things like that?”  He rolls his eyes.

“I don’t know. I guess I just like the idea of ol… Read full post »

• I no longer believe that people are innocent unless proven guilty.

• I no longer believe that my words are of less worth than the words of others.

• I no longer believe that being nice is my only option.

• I no longer believe that to have integrity means being a wimp.
… Read full post »

 
It’s 1972. I live with my family on a military base. It’s Memorial Day weekend and the entire base is swathed in displays of patriotism. I walk into the Base Exchange behind my parents and immediately become engulfed in the crowd. Whereas, normally the entry area might have onl… Read full post »

What would you do? What would you do if your son had clung to life, barely, just barely, for weeks and you did not know from one day to the next if he would live, and if he did live, if he would even be able to function?  What… Read full post »

We met on foreign lands for

twelve months

Twelve months that alternated

between writing and reading and kissing

Making love in beds too small and too big

We met on foreign lands for

opportunity

Twelve months passing slowly

with times too fast and times too slow… Read full post »

By the time I get to the end of the lane I have decided to leave.

I was only going to retrieve the recycling bin.

But the smell of the night, the moon’s glow, the crispness of the evening air--OH how they called to me! And I thought… Read full post »

He came from nothing. His parents left him, literally, in the front yard of the shack they lived in. 

“Wait here. That’s what they said. And so I waited and waited. Even after the social worker or whoever she was took me to the home, I would run back there… Read full post »

Hello?

Hey.

...oh, hi...

I know. It’s been a while. Too long, really.

Yeahhhh. It has been a while.

I’ve missed you. I wanted to hear your voice again.

Oh.

::chuckles:: Come on, it hasn’t been that long, has it?

Um, yes. Yes,… Read full post »

Earlier today, OSer Mark Pritchard posted “Question for beautiful women”. (read here) I clicked on it because I was curious. Sometimes a provocative title draws readers but the actual post is about something unrelated. I moved to his post, read it and wondered about answering: Does… Read full post »

I don’t believe in love at first sight. 

However, I remember every detail of you the first moments we met. How your brown eyes sparkled. The crunch of the apple you were biting into as you turned the corner. A sole sprig of hair bouncing. Your generous lips smiling.

… Read full post »

Rue Cler is bustling. The vendors yell cheerfully and the customers all seem to be in a good mood. We hold hands walking down the street of wares. Fruits, flowers, meats--all seem incredible and fully present for our taking.

 It is not custom for the customer to pick out his/her produce.… Read full post »

I stand in the door way of your room. It smells like teen spirit which really means it smells like teen boy. It’s been almost two years since I laid in your bed, sobbing as I took in the scent left behind on your pillow.  Now, I ache in your… Read full post »

Sometimes I read a posting on OS just because of the poster’s name. Some names suggest aspects of a person such as their profession:  psychomama, lunch lady 2, teendoc.  Others I come to find out that there is an attachment to someone or a beloved pet: cartouche, asperger mom, and sca… Read full post »

Most of my life has been spent in a quiet truce with the world around me.  Early on, I learned to adapt, to duck and to dodge. I learned the importance of not drawing too much attention to me, sometimes doing this by getting lots of positive attention. I was… Read full post »

Today I heard stories about being beaten up and humiliated by others. My sadness at hearing these stories crept into my consciousness and I felt a sort of stillness that I associate with depression.  In the meantime, a text message came in from a friend stating, "It's okay to take care… Read full post »

My office mates and I are looking for a new place to call our own. This is rather like herding cats because all of our needs, hopes, and fantasies come skittering out.

“Oh, we have to stay downtown!”

“I want a bigger office. Say, I hope we can get… Read full post »

"Love after Love" 
by Derek Walcott

Every day that I see you

I see change

Every night that I see you

I fear change

Your strengths create false promises

While your limitations

Crowd my imagination

Your limitations are too heavy for you… Read full post »

I hate everybody. You, the one reading this, I hate you too. I feel such rage against the world and truly, exasperatingly, I have no outlet for this except to rage here on OS. This is the only place I believe that I might be read. And, then, so what? What… Read full post »

It's Friday.  It's been a long week of hyperbole and shouting, of hope and fear, of not knowing what end truly is up.  It's been a week wherein my head whips in surprise at unexpected words and my heart skips at a beat at the sound of my beloved's voice.  I… Read full post »

My hope is more fragile than I wish to admit.

I talk a good talk but when the winds pick up, when there is a crack in the floor, a thud against the wall, I seem to become Chicken Little. I don’t cry, the sky is falling! but I do/… Read full post »