AUGUST 1, 2010 10:18PM

In My Father's Shoes

Rate: 32 Flag

 

I'm trying to remember to blink. I'm trying to remember to speak clearly. I am trying to remember to swallow carefully. Walk one foot in front of the other. Don't trip. I'm just so tired but I should stretch and exercise and not get mad. Steady now.

It is a marathon of conscious actions I have to remember now: 26 seconds to 26 minutes to 26 hours to 26 days to 26 months to 26 years. Will I last 26 years? My father lasted 23.

Blink, move, stretch, talk, swallow--carefully, precisely--constantly but I'm so tired already.

This is not bi-polar--Parkinson's is not a disease where I take a pill and pretend I don't have it. If I do--I lose. I lose precious seconds, minutes, hours, days --years.

Friday, I landed in my father's shoes--my tremor of 8 months-Parkinson's.

Blink, move, stretch, talk, swallow--carefully, precisely--constantly. 

I'm trying to remember to breathe.

Author tags:

coping, father, parkinson's

Your tags:

TIP:

Enter the amount, and click "Tip" to submit!
Recipient's email address:
Personal message (optional):

Your email address:

Comments

Type your comment below:
Oh christine...keep breathing... I wish I had more..r
Oh, geez! Sending all my positive wishes your way.
I have signs to remind me to breathe, on my mirror and refrigerator and computer. I don't have Parkinson's, somehow I just forget to. So I maybe understand 1/100th of what you have to deal with, and my heart is with you.
Christine, I know you have and will be given everything you will need to deal with this. There is so much living and loving and joy and happiness that can be experienced in those 26 (plus years) as well as possible medical breakthroughs yet to be discovered and a power beyond what any human can imagine that has the power to change everything.
Nothing but prayers for you.
Rated with hugs
such crappy news, and i'm sorry -- but hopeful for you.
Christine, I'm so sorry to hear this. You need to write about this probably about as much as you need to breathe. Keep writing and keep writing. And lean on us here all you like.
The Killer's have a song that says "If you can't hold on, if you can't hold on, hold . . ."

I hope you can continue to hold on.
During my childhood, I watched my grandfather lose his battle with Parkinson's.
R
I'm just a phone call away. With infinite empathy and love,
Thoughts and prayers your way. I can't imagine how hard it must be.
We're all here for the Hero's Journey. Please keep writing about yours. we're listening.
Christine,
Steve Blevin's recent post sent me here. I am upset by your news but hopeful in the advances being made in Parkinson's research and sending all the best thoughts your way.
Christine, I found this after reading Steve Blevins' post today. I wish you all the best.
Christine, wishing you all the best.
sending love, prayers, all your amazing presence evokes in me.
I'm on the trail of those following Steve B's post. My sincerest best wishes and prayers are with you. Breathe deeply and write your feelings if you want to share. With love and hope. R
Much love and grace and strength for you.
Steve sent us - we wish you comfort, and shelter from the storm, and will remember to breathe with you. . .
~fatRocco and stillferalRusty
I'm so sorry. I have nothing helpful to add except to tell you that you have one more person in your corner. XOXO
I too am a devote of The Blevins... Remember to breath and always keep in mind that you have Lots of people in the Universe who may not Know your face, or your voice, but we know your spirit through this post...
My thoughts and prayers are with you...