Sex after children? The normal kind, not the obligatory Holiday blow job. Get real. Not on this planet. Not in this life. Unless it is with another woman, and who has the time or energy for that?

Internet porn can be good. Very. But still just an image on a screen.

Lying in bed at a respectable 11 pm. Wife sleeping the sleep of the dead. Or the innocent. Or a person that has been up at least once a night since the first night home from the hospital.

It wouldn't be impossible to wake her up. She would be justifiably annoyed, but maybe be a good sport about it. And about as aroused as a corpse.

So he gets into fantasy mode. Lowering the bar. Into the netherworld.

Like High School.

Where if he had a half naked female next to him in bed at 11 pm it would have been rather exciting. Or more accurately, very exciting. Like winning the $6 million mega lotto. 

And he gently turns toward her back. Then touches her breast. Which she will notice but not be overly annoyed. And himself.

She starts to notice, half asleep. Which is also half awake. And asks. "Are you?"

And then touches. "Oh God."

But not like porn.

More like, "Why me? Why now? What is it with males?"

And makes a very perfunctory effort.  More accurately an effort at making an effort.

"Can't you just do it yourself?"

"You can touch me"

Which is exactly what he had been doing. But asking him. Nice gesture. 

It would have been hot when he was 16. Feeling a girl up. Touching her body. In a bed.

And she wakes up a little more. It is impossible to be that quiet. Especially toward the end. Vibration. Breathing.

And then less noise and she asks, "Is that it?"

And then, after verifying, "mmm."

That was it.