make jello with cocoa
shave their face with a real razor
shave off their eyebrows
cross a busy highway at night, backwards, dare someone to do it blindfolded
see if they can balance the ficus on the balcony railing
boil ketchup to make soup
test microwavable dishes and utensils to see how long it takes to melt
try it with the addition of a metal fork or aluminum foil
cook the dogs food in the microwave
fry an insect in the microwave
cook moms expensive makeup in the microwave
melt cheese directly on the stove
cook eyeglasses to see what will happen
search the house for anything of a sexual nature
call in their friends to help
eat raw pasta
bike on the side of the highway
without a helmet
with a huge cluster of friends
be the one on the outside closest to the moving traffic
boil onion soup/instant mashed potatoes - but forget to use water and let it cook for a while
do a piercing somewhere on their body with a needle and thread
try the diet coke and mentos trick
then with root beer and alka seltzer
orange soda and pop rocks
drink it
make their younger brother or sister taste it
coax their younger siblings into drinking insect repellent to see what will happen
call for an ambulance
look up how to make a homemade tattoo and give their best friend one using needles and india ink, a ball point pen or a sharpie
set small fires in the basement or attic
melt crayons on the radiator
look up all dirty and or sexual words on the internet/dictionary/encyclopedia
forward anything particularly disgusting to their principal/teacher/best friend/best friend's cougar mother/father/big brother/big sister
stuff to put in the fish tank/toilet bowl:
cell phones
telephones
(then call them while they're in there to see if they still work)
electrical extension chords
all the alka setzer in the house
mom/dad/grandma's/their medication
the cat
extra kid points if you make a youtube movie doing any of these things
by no stretch of the imagination does this list even begin to touch on some of the insane things children have done and are doing now. I have forgotten more than I remembered and most of the microwave things on the list we did directly on the stove with fire. today's youth are fabulously creative. just do a youtube and stand back!
I notice much of this involves food. I figure this is because kids are always hungry and forever rummaging around, hoping to find something to nibble on. even if you lay in sacks of chips, they will still melt something somewhere to dip them. or take peanuts, shelled or not and throw them in a blender to make peanut butter. kids are always on point!
as I see it, this is life. experimenting and exploring is what kids do especially left to their own devices. so:
what are some of the weird things you did?
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Comments
dead yes. but famous.
I once had a sword fight with kitchen knives.
Do these qualify?
duaneart: you sound like my brother. except I was the oldest so I was the one with the roach poison. we had quite a few fights involving kitchen knives, but thank heavens no real follow through. once I got the knife away from him I'd beat the crap out of him. (but I was the only one who was allowed to beat him up)
There certainly was not You Tube!!
Good post my dear friend!!
but we did have exlax! the chocolate laxative! yum!
Take pictures from said roof of cornfields and cars slowing down to gawk at two children on the roof with a camera.
Pee off the edge of the roof because you're too lazy to climb down (boys only).
Ride a bicycle off a barn roof.
Convince your brother that salt water is a protein drink and will make him grow big muscles like Arnold.
Take the doors of the furnace room closet (which is where your mother keeps the Christmas presents and which is held shut by a padlock and a length of chain looped through a third handle in the center after she learned you could open the door just wide enough to sneak a double-jointed monkey arm in and rifle around) completely off with a screwdriver. Go through all the Christmas presents. Find out you're getting slot cars this year. Put everything back. Laugh hysterically when you confess Christmas afternoon that none of the gifts were surprises and your Mom sobs about how you "ruined Christmas." Laugh hysterically now that Mom thinks this entire story is funny.
Take the seats off the family's bicycles and switch them around for no good reason.
Use Mom's sewing machine to turn the lining of Dad's dress coat into a straightjacket. Never confess that you know what happened to the lining of said coat.
Tie each other to the clothesline poles in the backyard and pretend to burn each other at the stake.
Lock each other in the compost cage.
Find an old pair of Mom's pants from when she was a size 24. Put both your legs in one leg, have your brother put both of his legs in the other. Hop alternately down the hallway to make the pants walk.
Climb the hallway walls by pushing one hand and one foot against each side, then wiggling your way up. Keep at it until you are flush against the ceiling. Hang there like a spider.
CatFoodAppropriator: yes...that can be somewhat disconcerting. imagine some of the things they did before you caught them. I had boys. I KNOW they get the devil in them sometimes.
Bloggingwoman: not if you were your sister. how old were you? if you were younger than ten, you get MAJOR kid points. that would definitely go viral especially if she cried.
Scanner: oh boy...I'd go nuts...the eyeballs are only an inch or two below the hairline!! yikes!
Torman: the good old days when we were dirty little buggers! I found the BEST book in my parent's room. It was so weird, it was almost pornographic but it wasn't. It was truly an instruction manual but the author was obsessed with pubic hair and quite a bit of the text was devoted to the various nationalities and how their pubes differ. very very weird. so weird, I STILL remember the diagrams. ::shudder::
Leaeandra, you are a woman after my own heart - incredibly smart and mischievious. I do like the switching bike seats. stuff like that is definitely Gaslight material. "hey..why is my seat blah blah", especially if everyone isn't dissatisfied with the switch. what fun!!
There was a horrible period of my childhood when we lived in Iowa -- my brothers tied my little maple rocking chair to the pipes in the basement to make a swing -- chair ended up in splinters. And the hand-sewn babydoll my mother made me lost her head because my baby brother slammed her around trying to get her eyes to move.
But I don't have any resentments about it.