dedicated to my mother

Psmith (I think he's armed?)

The Cure

 A friend once admitted that reading P. G. Wodehouse is his favorite free therapy.   When he was feeling particularly dark or untalented  or unwanted, he would hole up and read half a dozen Wodehouse novels until he felt like facing life again.  I jumped a little when he said it, because I did the same thing. 

If you are down  or lonely or feeling undistinguished, I offer you the all organic, homeopathic, purely herbal  P. G. Wodehouse cure for what ails you.

My lovely book-loving  mother once handed me a paperback of  The World of Jeeves-- the best gift she ever gave me. 

Wodehouse says it best:

Unseen, in the background, Fate was quietly slipping the lead into the boxing-glove.  Very Good, Jeeves

Oh, Bertie, if I ever called you a brainless poop who ought to be given a scholarship at some lunatic asylum, I take back the words. Jeeves and Feudal Spirit

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My Aunt Agatha, for instance, is tall and thin and looks rather like a vulture in the Gobi desert, while Aunt Dahlia is short and solid, like a scrum half in the game of Rugby football. In disposition, too, they differ widely. Aunt Agatha is cold and haughty, though presumably unbending a bit when conducting human sacrifices at the time of the full moon, as she is widely rumoured to do, and her attitude towards me has always been that of an austere governess, causing me to feel as if I were six years old and she had just caught me stealing jam from the jam cupboard: whereas Aunt Dahlia is as jovial and bonhomous as a dame in a Christmas pantomime.  Much Obliged, Jeeves

 ‘Do you know,’ said a thoughtful Bean, ‘I’ll bet that if all the girls Freddie Widgeon has loved were placed end to end—not that I suppose one could do it—they would reach half-way down Piccadilly.’
‘Further than that,’ said the Egg. ‘Some of them were pretty tall.’  Young Men in Spats

 Aunt Agatha, who eats broken bottles and wears barbed wire next to the skin.  Code of the Woosters

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I remember when I was a kid at school having to learn a poem of sorts about a fellow named Pig-something--a sculptor he would have been, no doubt--who made a statue of a girl, and what should happen one morning but that the bally thing suddenly came to life. A pretty nasty shock for the chap, of course.   Right Ho, Jeeves

Photo ©Mike Searle

Anybody can talk me round. If I were in a Trappist monastery, the first thing that would happen would be that some smooth performer would lure me into some frightful idiocy against my better judgment by means of the deaf-and-dumb language.  The Inimitable Jeeves

  At this moment, the laurel bush, which had hitherto not spoken, said "Psst!"  Summer Lightning

He groaned slightly and winced, like Prometheus watching his vulture dropping in for lunch.  Big Money

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 Though never for an instant faltering in my opinion that Augustus Fink-Nottle was Nature's final word in cloth-headed guffins, I liked the man, wished him well.  Right Ho, Jeeves!

If the prophet Job were to walk into the room at this moment, I could sit swapping hard-luck stories with him till bedtime.  Right Ho, Jeeves

 Sociological Note

While Wodehouse is well known for his British nincompoop aristocrats, he lived in America on and off for much of his life.  He set many, many stories in Manhattan during the Roaring Twenties.  Chorus girls, flappers, lady authors, nouveau-riche American millionaires, private secretaries, judges, policemen, and his cast of bemused Englishmen play on forever.

 Flapper with an essential component

 Not All Tea and Crumpets

Wodehouse, who never seemed the least bit political, actually lived through a terrible scandal.   Lucky me,  I have a copy of  Wodehouse at War by Iaian Sproat (© 1981), which deals with the controversy.

Early in WWII, Wodehouse was living in the South of France when the Nazis invaded.  He was too slow to get out, and was captured by the Nazis.  While he was a civilian captive, he was asked to broadcast something funny to the English via Nazi radio.  

Well, he did. 

The resulting stink lasted for decades. 

Eventually, he was "cleared" of the charge of collaborating with the enemy and was even knighted.  However, the file on the investigation remained closed.  One of the ironies about World War II--the secrets of the War were kept for decades, so our generation has better access to its history than those who lived it.

Wodehouse at War  includes documents straight from the MI5 file held on Wodehouse,  including interviews with assorted witnesses.  It also includes the complete radio transcripts.

Wodehouse was writing busily during his internment.  He and his wife did not have access to the funds they had been living on before capture, so he was supporting himself with his war-time production, at the ripe age of 59.  He finished Money in the Bank and another novel during the War.

A typical fragment from those radio broadcasts:  " Young men starting out in life have often asked me, "How can I become an internee?" Well, there are several methods.  My own was to buy a villa in Le Touquet and stay there until the Germans came along.  This is probably the best and simplest method.  You buy the villa and the Germans do the rest."  

This follows his preface in which he relates that  he had been a Civil Prisoner  for 49 weeks and only released to live in a hotel under the watchful German authorities two weeks previous to the broadcast.  

When I was a kid, every now and then some film was released of a US POW held by the Vietnamese.  Our soldiers  were always supposed to have included some visual hint that they didn't believe the anti-American things they were saying--such as parting their hair on the wrong  side.  One can imaginge Wodehouse trying to broadcast his own anger at the same time he knew his life and his wife's life were on the line.

Post War Silence

Wodehouse never published any writing about his WWII experiences.  He was eager to do so after the war, but his publishers, friends, and even the British authorities  urged him to let the controversy die without him addressing it.  Instead, distorted memories of people who had only heard the broadcasts once in 1941--and misremembered them--solidified with the passage of time.

Perhaps the closest Wodehouse ever came to including politics in his novels, was in his characterSir Roderick Spode, who leads the fascist organization of Black  Shorts.  "All the shirt colors were taken."  Wodehouse also introduced numerous socialist characters.  Usually, Bertie ends up feeding them.  

Black Shorts Insigia via tv adaptation

 Through remaining officially silent, the Wodehouse controversy simmered on, revived every so often in editorials denouncing the old man.  He never returned to England after the War--living in an unofficial exile. 

In 1975, he was knighted.  He died later in the year.  

Pelham Grenville Wodehouse's characters remain clad in the hazy sunshine of the prosperous Twenties.  The Depression never entered.   The Nazis and blitzes and prison never entered.  Pearl Harbor never happened.  Hiroshima and Nagasaki were never bombed.  

We all cling to some happy memories, some more than others.  We try to remember ourselves doing good and being good.  But few of us will ever be anwhere nearly as successful as P. G Wodehouse.

The Real P. G.

  I would like to share this characteristic anecdote from page 100 of Wodehouse at War.

Guy Bolton was Wodehouse's collaborator on musical comedies. 

"His (Wodehouse) flat was on the fourth floor.  There was no lift and Guy, travel-tired, toiled up the long staircase to arrive somewhat breathless as he entered the already open door.  Plum had just finished a letter and he called out a cheery "Hurray, you're here.  Just a tick while I get this letter off."  So saying he walked to the half-open window and tossed it out.

"What on earth!" exclaimed Guy . . .

"You're referring to that letter?  I throw all my letters out of the window.  I can't be bothered to toil up and down the stairs every time I post a letter . . . ."

Wodehouse explained that someone or other would always pick them up and post them for him.  Two days after Wodehouse had told Bolton of his unusual method of mail delivery, the following incident occurred, as described by Bolton:  "Guy heard a timid knocking on his door.  He opened it, and a man said, 'Your name 'Bolton'?"  Guy said it was.  'I've got a letter for you, sir.' Guy put his hand towards his trouser pocket.  'Thank you, sir, but I'm not looking for any tip.  I was coming this way.' He felt completely different about a beer and Guy poured him one.  While he was drinking it, Guy went to the telephone and called Plum.

'I've got your letter,' he said.

Plum said, 'Are you sure it's mine?'

'Yes, of course I'm sure.'

 'I only threw it out of the window twenty minutes ago.'

Recommended Books:

Yet again, I will whine about the fact that British titles and American titles often are different for a a few editions--and then scurry across the Atlantic  for an untidy affair.    It's not MY FAULT!

 Wodehouse at War:  The Extraordinary Truth about P. G. Wodehouse's Broadcasts on Nazi Radio by Iaian Sproat (1981:  Tichnor & Fields US edition, Milner and Company British edition)

Psmith in the City and Psmith, Journalist.  Psmith is a genius who tackles the world of finance in the City and the world of journalism in "Journalist."  I wish all careers were as successful as Psmith's.

The Code of the Woosters.  The Bertie Wooster and Jeeves series exists as novels and short stories.  Followed by Right Ho, Jeeves, Joy in the Morning, and The Mating Season.  I believe that one of these was written by Wodehouse during his "German" period.

Meet Mr. Mulliner.  Mr. Mulliner is one of the greatest narrators in all English literature.  All these stories feature a member of his extended family.

Pigs Have Wings. Set in Blandings Castle, the Earl of Emsworth and his retainers, sisters, etc. deal with nefarious plots and incognito intruders.  Never visit a country house using your own name!  

The Little Nugget.  Wodehouse's answer to the Ransom of Red Chief.

Ukridge.  When it comes to making money, Ukridge always has a plan.  Always.

Hot Water.  Just fun!

There are lots of biographies out on Wodehouse, ranging from slim to doorstops.  There are also "Companions" to Wodehouse and "Guides" to Wodehouse.  You can always visit the Wodehouse Wikipedia article and follow the links to various Wodehouse web-sites.

Some Sort of Jeeves Extraction  from TV.  Available on DVD, No Doubt.