All of my commenters seem to want me to expose more, so I will.

Yes, I am the plotter and this is a goodun that might even get me in the GOP Dirty Tricks Hall Of Fame. Or at least a seat on the podium with Dick Armey and Glenn Beck at the next GOP Dirty Tricks Banquet which is going to be on the Swiftboat again this year. If not, maybe they'll let me dance with the Hammer as entertainment after his poor stress fractures heal. 

Did you know the latest AP poll found 56 percent approve of Obama's job performance, up from 50 percent in September? It did. Damn! Damn and Hell! And cowpaddies!

This is the first time since Obama took office in January that his rating has gone up. How can that be? And what are us loyal,  patriotic, Obama-hating GOPers going to do about it?

We threw everything at him. We accused him of everything but wanting to increase welfare in Appalachia so he could suck the blood out of white babies — which maybe somebody like Haley Barber did quietly on like the Mississippi state party blog, and maybe I just missed it. 

Anyway, this poll result is more horribly worse than 50 year old country boys trying to sing hip hop. Or worse than seeing Rachel Maddow in a ball gown cheek-to-cheek with Ana Marie Cox (in pants) on the White House lawn dancing to the sounds of 50 year old country boys trying to be M&M for a anti-gun abortion rally.

I'm sure we all remember a couple of months ago when all them tv talking heads were saying how bad us Republicans were doing, and how we were only a southern regional party. Well, of course, we’re not eating as high off the hawg as when we had a real Texan in the White House, and that's a damn fact. But we were making a comeback led by political giants like John Kyle and John Boner. These are men who know how to say "no." And no is like the first half of Noni, so if we are the "Party Of No" it means we're already half way to being the Party Of Noni. Pretty logical, huh?

But, let's face it, politics is a zero sum game the way the great brain Karl Rove taught us to play it. If Obama is up, we Republicans are down. This is something that my idol Rushie-poo saw first, and said outloud and proud.

So us Republicans are screwed — even after our great victory when Chicago lost the Olympics which was Obama's fault, and he embarrassed America by going to Copenhagen, when Oprah had already gone. Obama's poll numbers should've gone into the toilet. And they didn't. Did I already say "Damn, hell, and cowpaddies!"? If I did, and I don't like to go back and look at what I wrote b4 because it confuses, me, I'll say it again. Damn, hell and cowpaddies!

Us gung-ho Grand Old Partiers have to do something about this whole schmegeggie. In fact, I personally want to do something because as I learned in typing class, “Now is the time for all good men to come to the aid of the party.” Funny how things you learn in school just show up in your head when you need them.

The question is how exactly? Even a political whiz job like Michael Steele should realize we need to recruit more democretins and wishy-washy traitor independants. Like Duh!

(BTW: I figure I've honked off all the Dums by now, so bad that they ain't reading anymore and I can reveal my Secret Psychotic Plot which is even better than my nefarious plan for Texamerica Seceeding from the Union, or my other brilliant plan for pulling a Brer Rabbit In Afghanistan.)

My evil boss, Yo, invented this cocktail recipe to make fun of Rush. Yo called it the Limbaugh Rush and she thinks it’s funnier than Rocky Mountain Oysters. The recipe was stupid — just a bunch of prescription meds washed down with Coors Lite.

But I’m smart enuff to know how to turn the tables, and use the tables against her — like how she used them against Rusheroo. And if we execute my slightly psychotic plan, we can swiftboat them commie liberals until they think righter than Reagan.

How? Easy as shooting fish off a log. We just get all them folks to do the “Limbaugh Rush.” 

I tried a Limbaugh Rush with Rush's fave, Oxycotin, and it totally blasts your brain like a peyote popsicle. Wowie-kazowie!

If we can get dumocrats to swallow a Limbaugh Rush or three, it will fry their cognativitating synapses, and they’ll join the Party Of Noni faster than you can say “GOP-Brain.” 

I know my plan is a bit crazy and tricky and evil, but it could save the country from Civil War or Secession,  and I'm sure Dick Cheney would approve. 

I really mean it.