Jess: You'll never have to be out there again. '''
What is not to love about Nora Ephron's writing and movie career , this article was supposed to be titled. But, let me first tell you, that I have known Nora, since childhood. I met her in her writings, in her feelings, in her dreams, in the characters she has created, in the actor friend choices she has made, I met her in my likings for romance, love and friendship, and life. Her work, is a major part of my inner life, of my emotional understanding and evolution, and with many of her films, I have spend my time, my tears, my wishes, my longings, and my 'Yes, I can do this too''. And, this last motivational, Yes I can, is the reason that I am now writing this essay on what is there not to love about Nora, and on being on the other side of movies, of books, of TV, of dreamful and romantic living. Cause, to be honest, I did not do my " Yes, I can ''.
And I am writing about being on this side, where you wait the great love to come, and your life will begin, of being on this side, where looking in movies, is like looking in a wishful mirror, and movies made by Nora are a guide on how to be, the romantic you, the good you, the struggling you, the funny you, the happy ending you. On being out there again, in the real life, where no romance can be found, where no universe comes in aid for true love, where good heart is not always enough to be with your other half, where mistakes are just mistakes, and not '' oh, you are so funny in everything you do''.
Knowing about her death, was a sadness, but it is a true sadness to me, the thinkings I had about my self, since I realized that I carry much Nora inside, and to be honest this scared me, cause this means I carry a lot of romance, of human believing, of self achieving, of child inside. To be clear, I have seen all of her movies, and as a woman, I have been carried away, by this theme style romantic story.
Starting with ''When Harry met Sally'', my emotional world is best described by her writing. I mean I totally found myself in all of the characters, their words could easily be mine, their feelings so familiar, their fears so true, real human, that gave us on the other side of the TV, the thinking that if they can do it, then we all can. I think that what I have to blame Nora for, is because she gave me the hope that my dreams can be my reality, that I can be a child inside and still a normal adult, that being in need and search of true love, is what will make my life worthwhile. I am blaming Nora, cause she is no longer around, and I feel like I have lost a friend, and what is there not to hate about this, about loosing a friend, a love and dream advocate. What is there not to hate, when now I think that movies will be just movies, with no true life involved in. And I am in need of true, happening life when I am seeing life in TV. I want to at least know, that this miracle is a true one, and that it is up to us on making it, the building of a loving life.
Her last film was Julie & Julia, and it has a true life theme , and how one girl of here- a member of OS- did make her dream her life. All this fighting inside, the fighting with the abilities one has and the life that has happened, the low-eye mentality of the successful friends, the lonesome, that can be found by your heart love, and the power that friends give to one, all are in this movie. And, like my sister, who came here OS, via this movie, i am here only following the path that Nora made with this work , cause I am a cooking addict, and I want to make my life be my working dream. Having read as much as I could, I met in here humans that most of us , are first dreams under construction and then social beings. Yes, it is true, we are dreams working to be lifes, and this theme is so obvious in Nora's works.
When thinking of Nora, I am thinking of the human that wrote the words for this brilliant heart ..
""Harry Burns: I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible. ""
What is not to love about Nora, after such a heart revelation, although this heart talk was never made to or for me, I am thinking, in my complex writing about her. All started by her own words : "...you can settle for reality, or you can go off, like a fool, and dream another dream." Heartburn . Well, this is what all these movies have done to me, they made believe that dreams actually can come true, and believe me it is so hard when facing real reality. We all know the difference between fiction and real life, but what one can do when movies, look so much alike to a viable and makeable life, what one can do, when she is left without her favourite story teller. Well, I must admitt it, I get angry when people die..., almost hating the feeling that I am left all alone. It is an abyss all right, the human soul, and fairytales are so necessary, not only to have a dreamy night sleep but to also have a guide path in life.
And, yes, I am a fool, and I will go one to dream my self another dream, only that it would not be as good as the dreams, Nora wrote to be the scenario of life. And I am sad, angry cause Nora inspired me to dream, to believe that dreams come true, to have sarcasm and funny ways, as solutions to everyday life, to have friends as my true, chosen family, and to have the emotional understanding, to understand the needs of others, without the other having to say '' understand me''. She made me believe that all life needs is just be good in heart and pure in mind, and that having a character is a must have, when dealing with others. A clear character that would be a clear mirror of me and others. She made me think, that my thoughts can make me a writer, that my feelings can make me a good friend, and that my cooking could be my life ticket. She made me like me, and find myself in her characters, and to be honest, in many occassions of my life I have used her words, with my most favourite and life relating quote to be this one made by the two no-heroes in the movie "'When Harry met Sally'':
Jess: You'll never have to be out there again. '''
Ι have feared, meant and asked the same question, where the out there is the life of solitude, of loneliness, of searching, fighting, giving yourself, when no one wants to have/know you, where the out there being, "I have no one to love and love me''. I have been in this '' out there '' and l, like the characters, do not want to be there again. Ι think writers, are our spiritual relatives, and I consider her to be a heart relative of mine.
Nora's death, has left me in an '' out there'', and I am both sad and angry.
Here is my favourite all times movie, after ''Gone with the Wind'', the Harry and Sally movie.
Be well and enjoy it.
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