This is a follow up to my B.M.O.C.  post that I wrote last month.  Since it's rather long and I'm still writing parts of it, I decided to post it in periodic installments.  Please feel free to comment as I am really trying to improve my writing.  Thanks!

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 She was humming in the kitchen when she heard what sounded like the clang of the metal mail box from the front porch.  As she drew back the shade, she saw the portly mail carrier descending the steps much quicker than her frame would give away.  Perhaps it was because she couldn’t wait to get back on the sidewalk once again to feel the warm rays of the sunshine bathe her face on this beautiful and promising spring day. 

She had every expectation that it would be there as it was typical for all invites to be sent to the last known address. So as she opened the front door of her parent’s house to reach inside, a smile whose brightness rivaled a partial solar eclipse danced across her face.  She saw the envelope with the return address: “The 1976 Summerville High 10th Anniversary Reunion Committee”.  September let out the loudest yelp until she realized that she wasn’t in her dorm room sharing secrets with her best friend and former college roommate, Terry Sullivan. 

When asked what the fuss was about, she quickly uttered “Ummmm…..Sorry, mom.  It’s nothing, I'll be up in my room if you need me” as she skipped up the steps double time to the bedroom that remained stuck in a decade old time warp.  It was exactly the way she left it before leaving for college. Even her old posters of "The Brothers Johnson" posing wantonly with their guitars strutting in front of them like psychedelic phallic symbols, she noted, were still there.  She began to absent-mindedly hum "I'll be good to you, good to you, good to you....................”  Ha!  She was glad her mom never made her get rid of those posters, even though they never sat quite right with her for some inexplicable reason.  September decided that she would explain it to her mom when she thought she was old enough to handle the truth!

September Johnson-Morris was a first year orthopedic resident at University Hospital. She had always been a gifted student at Loyola University and the go-to girl for those less academically inclined.  Still, that connection allowed her to venture into a world that a shy, non-Greek geek wouldn’t otherwise be privy too.  While she was never fully accepted into that society, it did allow her to mingle with people who taught her how to relax and live a little.  That was in stark contrast to the very sheltered life that she’d led with her parents and older brother. 

She understood that their over protectiveness was borne out of love for the lone girl child in their family, but its unintended consequences resulted in someone who lacked confidence and faith in herself.  The mere act of leaving her parent’s house allowed September to finally become her own counsel and to experience freedom on her own terms.  But as adult as she felt among her peers, she quickly reverted back to the awkward kid that her family knew, loved and seemingly depended on, as if on automatic pilot.

Her last chance to right a wrong that haunted her for a decade sat neatly wrapped in a buff beige envelope on her pink and white princess bed.  She knew how ridiculous it was to hold onto a dream that should have died a natural death years ago, but when does an affair of the heart ever resemble something that is remotely logical?  Her mind raced back to the one time that she actually spoke to the guy that she never quite got over.  She could still see the pain in Billy Walsh’s eyes when he thought that she was rejecting him.  Why didn’t she have the intestinal fortitude to be who he needed her to be right then at that moment? 

Regrets were and still are her constant and faithful companion.  Most were simply the result of her lack of confidence despite her many academic successes such as graduating at the top of her class in med school.  It spilled over into her romantic life and made it very difficult to date until she met and fell in love with a fellow med student at Loyola who swept her off her feet into a whirlwind courtship then marriage.

Brian Morris wasn’t readily accepted by her family.  They felt like the relationship progressed too quickly; that she really needed to focus on her studies instead of a doomed-to-fail marriage. Eventually, the relationship was crushed by the weight of constant familial tension and intrusion, which proved to be too much for the young couple, so they separated after one year.  It wasn’t easy to tell if it was pride or shame that kept September mum about the separation. 

If she admitted that they had been essentially right, that would only serve to put her even further under their thumb.  She had to keep up appearances; at least until some reasonable time had passed then she would be able to proclaim a valiantly fought effort to make what she knew to be impossible, work.  There was no need to reveal that it was he who put an end to the farce by filing for the divorce.  Ah, yes…..those damnable regrets…  

September sat on the edge of the bed and with one deft movement, she opened the envelope:                                                                                                                                                                                           

Her once flat and boyish chest had blossomed into their full glory and accentuated her curvy figure and the tall frame that she’d finally matured into.  The hair that she had cursed a million times back in high school seemed to fit her as an adult and she loved the bouncy curls that framed her perfectly oval mocha face. 

She had three weeks to get it together and she wanted to be perfect.  She knew that Billy had exceptional taste in women.  Well, at least as exceptional as a high school boy could possess and she wanted to be certain that he noticed her and..........  Oh, good gracious girl! Get a hold of yourself!  You are a grown woman; at least pretend that you have evolved from the unsophisticated, giggly school girl that you used to be.  How in the world do you think this behavior could possibly be attractive to a sophisticated guy like Billy?  Get a grip!  Up until that moment, her life had been pretty staid.  She was the good girl, the dutiful daughter, the conscientious student, the inept wife.  He surely must have led the glamorous life as the drummer for some famous band with loyal sexy and no doubt, beautiful groupies at his beck and call and..........

Her beeper began to vibrate.  “Damn, I forgot that I’m on call tonight!”  September changed into her scrubs and rushed to her car.  Luckily, the drive to the hospital was a short one which was one of the reasons why she opted to move home.  It made sense geographically and financially since residents could literally starve if left to fend for themselves.  As crazy as her folks made her at times, she was grateful for the help. 

The patient was bleeding profusely as she stepped into the ER.  “Black Male, late twenties, early thirties. Victim of hit and run was found unconscious on the side of the road about 30 minutes ago” murmured one of her fellow residents.  “Dr. Morris, are you with us?” asked the attending physician, Dr. Jones.  “Uh…… I…I…kn… know this man…..he….” she stammers as she drops the IV bag to the floor.