As the polls start to close and you begin to unwind from a day of lever pulling, touch screen or old-fashioned write-in voting and snuggle up to your antacid tablets, leftover hummus and whatever liquor you found under the hood while cleaning out the garage last weekend, it should not be lost on you dear reader, that November 2, 2010 is one that will forever live in infamy.

There was something that occurred on OS today that should neither be minimized nor overlooked.

No, it wasn’t the tetherball game between Paraguay and the Romanian Tourist Bureau that was being live-streamed or the fact that Mary Lin was made CEO of the Facelift Bar Conference. It wasn’t even as exciting as the long awaited first edition of the Dr. Seuss book, “Green Eggs and Spam”.

It was far more earth shattering.

At exactly 12: 44 pm EST, something most everyone thought would never occur on OS, actually took place, right here, on OS.  Besides lunch.

Tinkertink69 was awarded a long awaited, often begged for, overrated, yet highly coveted Editor’s Pick.  According to my sources, Matt Paust, john blumenthal, scanner and nanatehay helped him write his post but that’s wishful thinking pure speculation.

OS Editor Emily Holleman could not be reached for comment.

But did you notice there was much less spam around today than in recent weeks?  Tink is an IT guy who knows how to do Internetty kinds of things, so he might have been behind the whole EP thing.  Coincidence?  You be the judge.

The shockwaves are still being felt in Fresno.

I’ll wait as you scoop your cojones out of the toilet water and gargle with Lysol.

This is NOT the hope and change you were expecting when you headed to the polls today, is it?  Me either.

In honor of this once in a lifetime 20 month event which we will never hear the end of and because we shall be forced to endure watching Tink parading around, wearing his crown and the dress he wore for the evening gown portion of the competition, there is only one logical way to wash these images out of your eyes. 

We need to divert your attention.

For those of you who haven’t been around OS for long, you are about to witness a Pirate Wimmin Takeover.  Under the strict orders of Generalissima Zumalicious (that’s xenonlit to you), the Pirate Wimmin of OS is a loosely organized group of wimmin folk (“loose” being the operative word), whose numbers grow as the evening progresses, that have been mandated to take over the feed bring the boys of OS to their knees so that all hell can break loose.

What the hell is a Pirate Wimmin Takeover night about you may ask?  It’s like a train wreck without a train or direction.  Kind of like a rambling post with no paragraph breaks.  Like this one but without white space and spell check.

Why do we do this?

I dunno.  Ask Zumalicous or femme forte.

We’ve done a few of these before when we all were having our periods at the same time had nothing better to do, and it is like a virtual drunken brawl without the bar tab or the vomit. 

There are no “rules” except to have fun.

With no disrespect whatsoever to Kathy Riordan in her time of loss (which you can read about here and offer words of comfort), these little uprisings have taken place on a number of random evenings before and she herself was known to be an enthusiastic, active participant in many of them.

Pirate Wimmin being what they are, have to plan in advance (it’s called the element of surprise), and we have been hard at work behind the scenes scheduling nothing because we are only good at scheduling the date and time for these events and after that, all bets are off as to what happens.  Some of these Pirate Wimmin Takeovers have lasted for days.

Usually, trig palin or Ken Honeywell get involved and someone like Jeff Howe ends up begging for a blowjob mercy and directions.

Sorry, don’t expect me to offer any.  I just man the phones.

Let the Pirate Wimmin Takeover of the feed begin!  Join in the fun!