Let’s face it.  We’re all going to die.

You can go first.

In the meantime, I’ve decided that when my time comes, I’m going to die happy.  Without ever having bad sex again you.

After too many years and far too many disappointments, I have made up… Read full post »

As 2010 draws to a close, many reflect on the events of the past or make predictions about what will happen in the coming year.  If I had a pair of crystal balls to see the future, it would surely stare right back at me.  The glare! I’ll admit that I/… Read full post »

For the life of me, I can’t explain it.

If there had been a category for it in high school, I would have easily been voted, “Most likely to be accosted by a complete stranger who insists on sharing his life story.”

But wait, it gets better. … Read full post »

It all started out innocently enough.  Girl (that would be me) meets social media (in this case, Facebook), posts profile, provides as little info as necessary, downloads some nicely retouched photos, acquires some friends, comments on a couple of items that make her giggle and then goes about h/… Read full post »

Am I the only one who read the assignment?  Emily threw out an Open Call directive that came from Sarah Hepola of Salon asking for suggestions to rename the “Sexiest Man” feature, not to describe what makes a man sexy.  I already know what makes a man sexy and so should/… Read full post »

It’s been a rough and tumble kind of week.  First there was Halloween and all the constipation that comes with it.  Less than 48 hours later came the midterm bloodbath.  If I see one more headline claiming that this election was a vote against Barack Obama and Nancy Pelosi, I&rsq/… Read full post »

When I was younger, I used to enjoy TV game shows.  When I visited Los Angeles in the mid 80’s, I even tried out for one.  Don’t ask me which one, I can’t remember.  What I do remember about that way too long ordeal was having to jump through a lot/… Read full post »

Hi!  Remember me?  I'm the neighbor whose front lawn you destroyed turned into a parking lot a couple of years ago when you had that open house about eight months after you surrendered your home to the bank disappeared completely, then got it back (under mysterious circumstances) and moved… Read full post »

Long before Berger dumped Carrie with a post-it note on  "Sex and the City", I was the victim recipient of a similar "Dear John" letter, except my name isn't John,  his was, I don’t have nearly the shoe collection that Carrie had and that might explain everything.  I will never f/… Read full post »

There's nothing like waking up on New Year's Day next to the man you love and receiving a text informing you that someone you know is dead to start off the new decade.  A sobering experience indeed.  Attending a wake to see someone in permanent sleep mode is not exactly the/… Read full post »

So I was thinking about why men’s penises sometimes remind me of miniature elephant trunks Hurricane Bill and if its direction is going to screw up my travel schedule later today and keep me from getting home at all this weekend today.  I also pondered why people on the Weather Channel/… Read full post »

My brother and his wife are still here.  I thought the arsenic in that big old bowl of Goobers (never Raisinettes!) would do the trick, but no luck whatsoever.  Instead, my water heater died.  Do you know how much a funeral for a water heater costs these days?  Whatever your guess… Read full post »

Here’s the deal.  I like long romantic walks on a moonlit beach as much as the next gay man.  Show me 17 couples engaging in this prefabricated idea of romance on the same stretch of sand at the same exact time and I’ll show you a parking lot full of cars… Read full post »

I just got here.   As a matter of fact, I joined Open Salon this morning.  

I don't have anything that looks remotely like Farrah's hair, I buy my gloves in pairs and I'm all for getting a bailout even if it might potentially come as a result of  ads by… Read full post »