Somewhere in my childhood life, I saw an episode of "Chariots of the Gods". Hosted by Leonard Nimoy, aka Mr Spock, my little mind was burst open with the possibilities of other lives, other civilizations, other times. I was aware of "the olden days" because of things like the Bicentennial and American history all around us in New England. I attended Sunday school, so there were "really olden days". Naturally, everyone was just like us, but with fewer things like cars and good shoes. "Chariots of the Gods" put an end to that belief. People had existed before us, in large civilizations, had communicated with outer space, had been really smart. And then, and then! They died off, fell away, disappeared, their dust returned to dust, until you swept it away and found remains in the deserts and jungle floors.
Among the many mysteries that "Chariots of the Gods" presented was the introduction of the old Mayan Calendar. 2012 was over 30 years away, so waiting for it was just going to have to happen. What did it mean that there was a new calendar, a new age, a new civilization? The Egyptians had marked similar passing of time, and if we could really get far enough down into those layers upon layers, we might get to the root of it all (though the Upanishads may differ on that). Their timelines focused on Leo and Orion, night skies that we had not seen in so long we didn't know there were people then measuring the stars' traverse and spin. Only in these past few years did the new media dig up the old Mayan Calendar, polish it off, and put a tale of utter destruction upon it. There have always been End Times a comin', and apparently there will always be.
Thankfully, I fear not the beginning and end, somehow life has shown me enough loopholes in the time/space continuum that I am neither scared nor worried about the after life, or the before life, or the next life. I am, however, not settled into this life- and thus my burden. Or opportunity. Do I feel like Sisyphus, always pushing this damn rock up the damn hill? What lays at the top of the hill? Would I rather find a meadow instead?
I should have known better than to think anything great would come of 2012, despite so much advertising and anticipation. I feel the same way about Oscar nominated movies, so perhaps my gut microbes are more connected with the time/space continuum than I give them credit for. I should have realized that the end of old times was coming on the solstice, and the beginning would happen thereafter. Of course it did, of course it did. If I look a little more microscopically, I probably would see a new day every time the sun came up. That could keep me in spiritual circles for aeons.
This January brought with it more thud than clap than I care to care for. Forget New Year's resolutions, I will have to try in February. With my birthday coming in a few days, that should be my New Year. And, with Solstice 2012 ushering in the Age of Aquarius (how come nobody was mentioning that one in the new media hype? Run out of room for iCuneiform on the electric tablet?) As an Aquarian, I feel transmission of energy and transform it into information, which generates the next cycle. Janus just looks forward and back all the time, static and constant.
I will have to start my New Year this week, after all. Everything else has been adjusting to someone else's New Year transition. I must shed a little skin, and reorganize if not revitalize. And I must let go of holding on, and I must let go of letting go. Tomorrow may be the end of the day, or a year, or an aeon. And it may just be the beginning of one.