Preparing for Our Move to China, Part V

My Rectilinear Life

overworkedtiredandnumb

Location: Dalian, China
Birthday: December 11

Bio: US expat living in China. Another 40-something woman experiencing mid-life crisis, only this time in China, with dumplings.

MY RECENT POSTS

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Tiger, Tiger (India, part 3)
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MY RECENT COMMENTS

“Oh shit. I think I might be one, too.”
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Overworkedtiredandnumb's Links

My Posts: 83. Tiger, Tiger (India, part 3); 82. Ridin' That (Turns Out to be Midnight) Train (india, Part 2); 81. A Passage to, uh, India; 80. A Dream; 79. Learn the Language; 78. When My Morning Comes Around; 77. 2010: The Year in Quotes; 76. The Immigration Bunny; 75. Google Translate, 一半半; 74. Motherhood, a photo essay; 73. Special Friend: Clay; 72. US-Chinese Relations: Slowly Warming Up; 71. Good Job, Bad Job, Any Job, Please; 70. Ideas That Shake My World; 69. Would you like some hot water with that?; 68. Special Friend: Brandon; 67. Special Friend: Jane; 66. A Visit to Hong Kong; 65. Pork Pastries 不好吃!; 64. Rock, Paper, What?; 63. 很可爱的女儿（Very Cute Daughters); 62. Digesting China; 61. Adapting (?) to China; 60. Christmas in China; 59. Expat Drunk Blogging; 58. Adventures in Translation; 57. Settling In - In China's Rust Belt; 56. And we're off; 55. Preparing for Our Move to China, Part V; 54. Preparing for Our Move to China, Part IV; 53. Preparing for Our Move to China, Part III; 52. Ft. Hood: Potential Lessons; 51. Things We Are Doing to Prepare for Our Move to China, Pt. II; 50. Cyber-Anger: Not New, But Lasting; 49. Things We Are Doing to Prepare for Our Move to China, Part I; 48. Attending the Theater; 47. Gloves On: Slightly Better Than Awful Pizza Now Available; 46. Old Couple Overheard on Flight from Chicago to Phoenix; 45. The Toilet Reveals Something Deep. But What?; 44. More Food Notes from China; 43. Lunch in China; 42. The Way We Made the Decision; 41. Choosing a Home in China; 40. House Hunting in China; 39. 不看 Facebook (No Read Facebook); 38. Almost a Year; 37. 15 in 15: The Quote Quiz; 36. Thoughts on Southern Liberals (i.e., Mama and Daddy); 35. Notes To and From a Packrat; 34. Dude, Where's My Brush?; 33. Dad is Awesome; 32. My American Idols; 31. Dinah Washington; 30. Spansion Lays Off Thousands While Spending to "Retain" Execs; 29. She's Mean and Evil Through and Through; 28. Signage; 27. Who Could Resist?; 26. A receipt; 25. Saturday, July 25th, 1925; 24. My Afternoon on OS: Or, I really need a new hobby.; 23. 2008 The Year in Quotes; 22. 25 is a lot of things; 21. Open Salon Cherry Juice Debate, a call for volunteers; 20. Open Salon Debate Format, Version 1.0; 19. Debating Debating: A Proposed Open Salon Debate Format; 4. Unearthing Treasures; 18. Hard Times; 17. Portrait; 16. OS Collage: o please o please o please let me in; 15. Hope Springs Eternal; 14. Pre-school Civics 101; 13. The Consolation of Laughter; 12. Circling the Square; 11. Compromise; 10. Here I Am; 9. Dull Ache; 8. The Way of Clay; 7. This is My Favorite Picture; 6. Poor Cissy Hadn't Got a Mama; 5. Some Beginnings; 3. Maintaining Sanity; 2. Mama Died Today; 1. Death 'n' Shit

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NOVEMBER 13, 2009 1:30PM

Rate: 2 Flag

Keeping it realistic

All places that the eye of heaven visits
Are to a wise man ports and happy havens.

This is what John of Gaunt tells his son Bolingbroke (the future Henry IV) when Richard II banishes him from England. Bolingbroke is seriously bummed and his father is telling him to make the most of a bad situation. And to experience the world as it is, to learn from it.

Our relocation to China is hardly a bad situation; it is exactly the opposite. We are thrilled to be going to China. We've dreamed about it and planned for it for two years. But the words of Shakespeare are my constant mantra. Because there will be bumps along the road. And it will be important to maintain perspective.

I grew up in an odd town in the South (Huntsville, Alabama) where much of the population were recent migrants to the South (for the engineering jobs there in the space program). I knew so many people who complained about being where they were I could never keep count. And I never fully agreed with them, even if I had my issues with some Southern attitudes.

You must find the strengths and weaknesses of a place; you focus on the strengths and develop strategies for working around the weaknesses. It is far too easy to blame one's unhappiness on a place. Usually, the unhappiness arises from unrealistic expectations. From within, in other words. I think it is particularly important to keep this in mind when moving to a new place.

Ignore this post! It's just here to remind me to keep it real!

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china, expat, expectations

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Comments

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By the way, Bolingbroke obviously didn't take his father's advice. Instead he came back to England with an army, deposed Richard II, and then starved him to death in captivity. That's how he became Henry IV. I hope to return more peacefully.

overworkedtiredandnumb

November 13, 2009 01:44 PM

and fluent mandarin will leave you and your children well-placed in the new world order.

al loomis

November 13, 2009 03:50 PM

Al,
Yes! We are hoping that our children will enjoy learning Mandarin and that we will be able to continue with it for a long time to come.

overworkedtiredandnumb

November 13, 2009 06:39 PM

Bon voyage! I think you said today is the day you depart for China.

Dr. Susanne Freeborn

November 14, 2009 12:48 PM

You guys will love China. Make sure to get all you vaccinations! I gotta read the rest of you posts to get more info but if you can, take the opportunity to learn Mandarin. Also, make friends withe the locals, not just expats. The embassy is a great resource esp when you're homesick but it's the local people who will make your time there beautiful and memorable. I lived abroad for a while and I am still friends with all my local people. Only friends with one expat.
Congrats and safe travels! I hope you can still blog and post photos when you're there!!!!!

TheHideousTruth

November 15, 2009 01:15 AM

best of luck and don't forget to write!

marcelleqb

November 15, 2009 02:22 AM

All of this is happening painfully slowly. We actually leave next Saturday. Before then we have to get the rest of our household into storage and visit some friends for a few days. For my daughters' sake, I wish we could just get the goodbyes over and leave.

overworkedtiredandnumb

November 15, 2009 11:25 AM

I've been living here for the past 6 years & can relate to where you are right now as you make the move.

You'll want to be sure to include Hangzhou on your travel itinerary for next year. We'll be more than happy to show you around this lovely city with its long history.