I know what failure

is all about, failed relationships

failed jobs

and I won't blame

anyone else, but I will say

I have had to learn

the hard way

I am much more cautious

I question myself, before

taking the leap

I see that many choices

have been unwise

I have responded to panic

fear of no relationship or no job

by taking the leap

with barely a second thought

if I had realized the danger

when panic sets in, perhaps

I would have paused

perhaps I would have

had the courage to seek

help

perhaps I would not have

done just about anything

to alleviate the pain...

but I have changed

 ***

Finally, Snow Fluttering Down (nontraditional haiku)

finally snow fluttering down in dawn light

our cats up on the sill, tasting the snow through the screen

a kid outside, says he is exploring  found a rainbow in the snow

driving slowly in the hills  anxiety is gone

***

Not Worried, Not Striving 

 I slow down

I go through my poetry

satisfied

just reading through it

making small changes

not worried

about anything

not striving

then taking a nap

on the couch, covered

with a soft blanket

not worried

not striving

Suddenly

suddenly I feel deep sadness

because of the distance between me

and my son