Finally, I appear to be getting somewhere in resolving some issues related to my political volunteer work. I am becoming more assertive in stating clearly what I want and need. Also, this change has played itself out in relating to medical professionals. It is my body and my decision whether I want to engage in a medical procedure or will accept a diagnosis unthinkingly. I am also assertive in my marital relationship in stating what is REALLY bothering me, instead of beating around the bush.
When I run into someone, though, who seems to lack a conscience (I am thinking of a former boss) I might be assertive for a while, but eventually am prone to run from the hills. And occasionally I launch into destructive yelling at the person, as opposed to simply expressing myself clearly. I realize that yelling never helps me or the recipient.
If you don't communicate how can you correct misconceptions or resolve issues?
Sometimes painful honesty in revealing personal imperfections and past mistakes goes with assertiveness, I think. Instead of shading of the truth in a resume or job interview, it could be a better strategy to simply state the truth, with explanation, if called for. With my job history (more past jobs than anyone I know), it is impossible to pretend that I have not had work problems, self-created or caused by poor supervision or whatever.
I could rationalize till the cows come home, but I don't think further rationalization will help me to get another job.
Honesty, openness, appropriate assertiveness--that's the way I want to live my life. Nothing more irritating than deceptiveness masked by vagueness or equivocation.