Before I join the other Used2Bs fastbreaking into another pathetic whine about how technology is complicating our lives, I thought I’d start by writing that my generation, the baby bummers, were the first real techno generation. Then I decided I won't, because although it sounds good, it isn’t true, something that Dick "I'll Never Stop Lying" Cheney might take a lesson from.You can probably go back to the time when some dude invented the reaper. My intern Noni says his name was Grimm, which means it probably wasn’t. He wrote horror stories, I think. Noni also says International invented the harvestor, which I don’t think is true, either. International invented the cotton gin. In any case, tech-whining goes back a ways.
I bet back then when newfangled steamboats were kicking up big wakes up and down the Mississipi, the old dudes (over 35) sitting on the shore would be saying how they don’t understand the new technology, but they have to learn it to keep the farm competitive, and why can’t we all be happy with horse power, when we’ve just learned the tools we got from Monkey Wards catalog to change the plow over to the grimm reaper or the international harvestor. I look back with a sense of wistfullness to that time before my time when the only bugs a guy had to worry about were flies and roaches. And real guys didn't worry about either.
Back to the present and Techo Me. I am not a Ludite. I am such an ace at html that one of my screen names in htmldrone. So now, when I’ve got html down cold, and can use Dreamweaver even better than my grandmother could use her singer sewing machine, I need to learn blogging and tweeting and social freaking networking.
Blogging for me on my own blog is WordPress which is fine for what it does, but it won’t let me do what I want to do in html or javascript (which I don’t know, but I’m good at cutting and pasting) so I’ve got to put on more plug-ins and widgets on my WordPress than I have plugs going into my three daisy chained surge protectors.
That’s bad enough, but now I have not only to do WordPress and Twitter and Facebook (to prove to the world I have no real friends), I have to read the WordPress News, and all techno articles on Twitter and Facebook that I get on my daily iGoogle news.
Otherwise when everybody else is writing a blog or a 140 character one liner that goes around the world faster than the latest Lindsay Lohan nipslip photo, I will be writing to nobody — but maybe you.
Just you. If you’re there. RU? No, don't answer. I'll tell my shrink about it.
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