Patton Lee Beaugus
- Location
- Hell's Kitchen, New York, USA
- Birthday
- January 01
- Title
- inmate/escapee
- Company
- Joliet Prison Psychiatric Ward
- Bio
- Writer and bar room philosopher.
Convictions for molesting verbs and fragmenting sentences without a license.
Author of Married Men's Militia — a Battleguide for Divorcing Guys.
After I made a heroic escape from the Joliet Prison Psychward by braiding my beard and pulling a Rapunzel, I changed my identity from John Patrick Gallagher to Colonel Patton Lee Beaugus.
http://buddabings.com
MY RECENT POSTS
- Debunkin’ Da Bunk: Why Obama
Is Not Failing
September 28, 2010 01:44PM - The Holy Ghost Will Work For
Food
January 29, 2010 07:55AM - Tunes To Fight The War On
Drugs By
November 18, 2009 07:55AM - Let's Make OS Into Dungeons &
Dragons
November 15, 2009 07:03AM - Should We Legalize The Good
Sht, Man?
November 11, 2009 01:14PM
MY RECENT COMMENTS
- “You mean I'm not
real?”
December 12, 2010 09:00AM - “I didn't think it was
possible to get nostalgic
about Cabrini
Green, but you
got…”
December 10, 2010 02:14PM - “Anyone who watches
Fringe is nerd. I certainly
am. I guess
that means we all
ow…”
December 03, 2010 11:45AM - “Quite beautiful.
Rated”
November 29, 2010 07:07AM - “My proctologist is
Jiminy Gerbil.”
November 28, 2010 09:33AM
Patton Lee Beaugus's Links
- A Patton Lee Beaugus Christmas
- #12: Backdoored For Christmas
- #11: I Want To Believe In Santa Claus
- #10: Hello D'Oliya
- #9: How To Survive A Christmas Eve Panic Attack
- Beginning: Home For The Holidays
- #8: I Want To Be Evil
- #7: The Anti-Claus Is Coming To Town
- #6: It's The Most Wonderful Time For A Beer
- #5: Bad is Good
- #4: Zoot Suit Weedwacker
- #3: Christmas Rapping
- Prologue: Heads Up
December 10, 2010 02:14PM
“I didn't think it was possible to get nostalgic about Cabrini Green, but you got me there. Butch McGuire's, the Billy Goat, and Cabrini Green. Ah, the…”
About: Cabrini Green's Last Tenant
“I didn't think it was possible to get nostalgic about Cabrini Green, but you got me there. Butch McGuire's, the Billy Goat, and Cabrini Green. Ah, the…”
About: Cabrini Green's Last Tenant
December 03, 2010 11:45AM
“Anyone who watches Fringe is nerd. I certainly am. I guess that means we all owe you a wedgie.”
About: Fringe Recap: Ep 3.8 "Entrada"
“Anyone who watches Fringe is nerd. I certainly am. I guess that means we all owe you a wedgie.”
About: Fringe Recap: Ep 3.8 "Entrada"
November 28, 2010 09:26AM
“I am spam, watch me grow, pimping shit ho, ho, ho, ho. You can try to block me, You can stop me for a mo, But I'll be back you know ho-ho, ho-ho, ho-ho Like th…”
About: Good Spam Sunday: Spammers on Vacation?
“I am spam, watch me grow, pimping shit ho, ho, ho, ho. You can try to block me, You can stop me for a mo, But I'll be back you know ho-ho, ho-ho, ho-ho Like th…”
About: Good Spam Sunday: Spammers on Vacation?
November 28, 2010 09:09AM
“To pimp or not to pimp. To whore or not to whore. That is the question. Good answer to it.”
About: Whoring My Whore Piece Because I'm Really a Whore
“To pimp or not to pimp. To whore or not to whore. That is the question. Good answer to it.”
About: Whoring My Whore Piece Because I'm Really a Whore
November 28, 2010 09:01AM
“Nice to meet you, Alice. In terms of what to blog or what to do, anything goes, and any good thing is appreciated, even your old lyrics on days you've…”
About: New to this blogging thing!
“Nice to meet you, Alice. In terms of what to blog or what to do, anything goes, and any good thing is appreciated, even your old lyrics on days you've…”
About: New to this blogging thing!
November 28, 2010 08:52AM
“Anti-freeze does not mix with anything but punch, assuming you have no Everclear to make you blind,”
About: Do's & Donuts: In Vodka Veritas
“Anti-freeze does not mix with anything but punch, assuming you have no Everclear to make you blind,”
About: Do's & Donuts: In Vodka Veritas
November 27, 2010 10:43AM
“I never knew that powerpoints were an aphrodisiac.”
About: Oh the things you men can come up with...
“I never knew that powerpoints were an aphrodisiac.”
About: Oh the things you men can come up with...
November 27, 2010 09:27AM
“You are funnier than Sara Palin — which to me is the ultimate compliment. Rated”
About: Black Friday
“You are funnier than Sara Palin — which to me is the ultimate compliment. Rated”
About: Black Friday
November 27, 2010 09:21AM
“I think we should make Willie the next "Drug Czar"”
About: And In Other News: Today is Saturday!
“I think we should make Willie the next "Drug Czar"”
About: And In Other News: Today is Saturday!
November 27, 2010 09:18AM
“I like flags. Flag decals. And flag handkerchiefs for dogs. I especially liked the ski pants I had in college that were designed like an American fl…”
About: Flags - For Kim Gamble
“I like flags. Flag decals. And flag handkerchiefs for dogs. I especially liked the ski pants I had in college that were designed like an American fl…”
About: Flags - For Kim Gamble
November 27, 2010 09:10AM
“You say the lame duckies efforts will be futile. Wrong. Once something passes, it is very hard to "make retroactive changes" especially wit…”
About: Lame, and Daffy Duck Session
“You say the lame duckies efforts will be futile. Wrong. Once something passes, it is very hard to "make retroactive changes" especially wit…”
About: Lame, and Daffy Duck Session
November 27, 2010 09:01AM
“I think the lawmakers will try to gut the healthcare bill — because they know it won't work, and they can keep bitching about it”
About: WILL ANTI-OBAMA LAWMAKERS PRACTICE WHAT THEY PREACH?
“I think the lawmakers will try to gut the healthcare bill — because they know it won't work, and they can keep bitching about it”
About: WILL ANTI-OBAMA LAWMAKERS PRACTICE WHAT THEY PREACH?
September 25, 2010 10:39AM
“I think you missed making Rush Limbaugh Chief Justice Of the Supreme Court.”
About: The ‘Pledge to America’ Is Candy-Ass
“I think you missed making Rush Limbaugh Chief Justice Of the Supreme Court.”
About: The ‘Pledge to America’ Is Candy-Ass
January 11, 2010 02:50PM
“I'm only disappointed in that I was in love with O'Really. I had fantasies about her as myself, JohnPatGallagher, Patton Lee Beaugus, and Noni The Int…”
About: Think Before You Comment
“I'm only disappointed in that I was in love with O'Really. I had fantasies about her as myself, JohnPatGallagher, Patton Lee Beaugus, and Noni The Int…”
About: Think Before You Comment
November 26, 2009 09:45AM
“WTF. I thought Open Salon was a serious place to blog. But I guess not. At least the editors don't see it that way. So I am insulted to the max. Wh…”
About: Calling all OS foodies: The Salon Kitchen Challenge
“WTF. I thought Open Salon was a serious place to blog. But I guess not. At least the editors don't see it that way. So I am insulted to the max. Wh…”
About: Calling all OS foodies: The Salon Kitchen Challenge
November 18, 2009 01:12PM
“john blu — if you noticed the type, you probably decoded the secret message between the letters that says ... OMG, I almost wrote it out. MiddleAg…”
About: Tunes To Fight The War On Drugs By
“john blu — if you noticed the type, you probably decoded the secret message between the letters that says ... OMG, I almost wrote it out. MiddleAg…”
About: Tunes To Fight The War On Drugs By
November 18, 2009 10:31AM
“Bobbot, I'd never heard of "Uneasy Rider" so I googled it. Funny song.”
About: Tunes To Fight The War On Drugs By
“Bobbot, I'd never heard of "Uneasy Rider" so I googled it. Funny song.”
About: Tunes To Fight The War On Drugs By
November 18, 2009 09:16AM
“I'm in agreement with Bobbit. Go Fuck Yourself is the greeting that keeps on giving.”
About: Can We Please Stop Saying “Enjoy Your Day”?
“I'm in agreement with Bobbit. Go Fuck Yourself is the greeting that keeps on giving.”
About: Can We Please Stop Saying “Enjoy Your Day”?
November 18, 2009 09:09AM
“I don't remember the first Potter book being anything but well written, but it has been a while. Maybe there are no big issues, but the plight of Harr…”
About: Why Good Fiction is Dying With Our Society
“I don't remember the first Potter book being anything but well written, but it has been a while. Maybe there are no big issues, but the plight of Harr…”
About: Why Good Fiction is Dying With Our Society
November 18, 2009 09:01AM
“I like the Doobies, but don't know a druggie song they did. With a name like that, you'd've thought at least one.”
About: Tunes To Fight The War On Drugs By
“I like the Doobies, but don't know a druggie song they did. With a name like that, you'd've thought at least one.”
About: Tunes To Fight The War On Drugs By
November 17, 2009 05:29AM
“I know what I know, and I know I'm right because the bible tells me so.”
About: emma peel: "I don't care what stupid people think"
“I know what I know, and I know I'm right because the bible tells me so.”
About: emma peel: "I don't care what stupid people think"
David Price
cartouche
Lyn LeJeune
fernsy
Dr. Strangemom
Amanda Brooks
Salon.com