(First posted in July, 2009, so a Saturday Evening rePost)
They had been arguing before they were removed from their cramped cage and hung upside down. The chicken on the Right now occupying hook K-127, the Left chicken on 128. They began their airborne journey over the factory floor.
“Look,” the Right chicken said, “we have been freed by the market forces you claimed doomed us!”
“You call this freedom? Being hung by our feet in shackles?”
“You lefties are never satisfied. You’re getting a free ride on the capitalist system, yet you complain about some common sense restraints. Freedom isn’t free, we all pay a price. Doesn’t the wind in your feathers make you feel better?"
“What I’m feeling is a sense of impending doom at the hands of the machine," the Left chicken replied. "If you right wing ideologues weren’t such tools of the fascist regime you’d feel it also!”
“Here you go again with the ‘machine’ crap! You resent the rich whose investment benefits everyone, so you want to steal their money to feather your own nest. You lefties want statist Marxist socialism, and will use any excuse to get it.”
“Everything else looks like socialism to a right-wing corporate boot-licking Hitler-loving fascist! You’ve been duped by false morals and petty materialism to accept slavery. I am working to release all chickens from the rule of despotic oligarchs!”
“And I will work to prevent the destruction of our capitalist golden egg by you Marx-loving commies!”
Then the Right chicken screamed:
“Socialism killed millions last century!”As the Left chicken screamed:
“Fascism killed millions last century!”
The line swung them around a corner. The Left chicken, the wind in his face, saw it first.
“The machine!”
“Not again!”
“No, I’m serious. Turn around!”
The Right chicken turned to see that the line led into a big machine. A plastic tube rapid-firing chicken heads into a large bin convinced it of its approaching fate.
“You know, you might be right about some things.” The Right chicken said.
“So you finally admit it,” the Left chicken yelled, "that means my side wins!" It grinned with smug satisfaction as they entered the DecapiPluk n' Gut 2000™.
Moral: Even though ideologues perceive themselves at opposite ends of the political spectrum, they often arrive at a common purpose.
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Ted Frier
The Flylooper
Ben Sen
mishima666
Paul Nevins
Ron Robinson
Salon.com
Comments
But that coalition collapsed and now we're headed for a major political conflict and transition after the storm. A new age is around the corner. We will see who wins.
We're headed for Weimar Republic times, i'm sad, but it seems this is the case...
All the various attempts at making either of them work for the good of the majority of the people have failed miserably. That there are those who still espouse strongly these unsuccessful systems, and make much noise and hoopla over their particular brand of social suicide, only distracts attention away from the need to devise a system that better meets our needs - for ALL of us!
But we'll keep on reviling "them other dopes".
Will that be regular or crispy?
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