A POST-MORMON LIFE

Life after leaving the Mormon Church

Rachel Velamur

Rachel Velamur
Location
Texas,
Birthday
February 15
Bio
Born and raised in a strict Mormon family. I write about what life was like as a Mormon and what my life is like after leaving.

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AUGUST 13, 2012 12:12AM

Why Ex-Mormons Keep Quiet About Their Experiences

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The Daily Beast recently published an article featuring an interview with Sue Emmett, who is the president of the ExMormon Foundation and the direct descendent of Brigham Young.  Sue talked about her experience as a Mormon woman with clarity, insight, and compassion.  I am grateful for Sue’s courage in going public with her experience as a Mormon woman.  

For years, I have been standing by the sidelines, wanting to tell my Mormon story but too afraid to speak out.  I want my family to listen when I tell them who I am as a person.  In all the years since my exit, no one in my family has ever asked me what I believe in and what my values are.  No one has ever thought to ask why I left.  I remember the Mormon mindset very well - even the slightest hint of criticism felt like religious persecution.  And so I have been keeping quiet, out of love for my family.

I have reached a point where I realize my silence is doing more harm than good.  Ex-Mormons keep quiet because we love the Mormons in our lives.  We keep quiet because we are afraid of what will happen to us and to our families if we speak out about our experiences.  We keep quiet because we do not want to face the condemnation of the people we once thought were our friends.  However, silence does not fix the problem - at best, silence is a temporary solution.  

In the ten years since my exit, there has been some progress within my family.  My mother treats me with all of the love and affection that she treats her other children, although even my mother does not ask about my beliefs.  My love for my mother strengthens and balances me, soothing a broken heart.  My father has dampened his rage towards me.  I feel more comfortable with my identity as a liberal agnostic woman.

But in other aspects, life has not gotten better.  One of my brothers has been treating my husband and me badly.  He makes snide comments about my husband’s ethnicity, cracking jokes about how all the Indians in this country either own Motel 8’s or 7-11’s.  We live three hours from my brother - in the three years since we moved to Texas, we have visited my brother a dozen times, during which he pokes fun at my husband’s vegetarianism, oblivious to the irony of mocking a Hindu’s dietary restrictions when as a Mormon he abstains from coffee, tea, and alcohol.  On the rare occasion he visits our home, he feels comfortable bringing meat with him, when my husband and I refrain from bringing coffee into his home.  And yet I have kept quiet about my brother’s behavior; I still do not feel that I am an equal within my own family.  I am still afraid of losing my family, as so many other ex-Mormons have lost theirs.

I had a difficult exit process - I first started questioning Mormonism when I was fifteen and I stopped believing when I was sixteen, when I was still living under my parents’ roof.  I survived for two years by concealing my unbelief.  The pain of living a double life - exacerbated by the very negative reaction I got when I confided in a Mormon girl I thought was my life-long friend - drove me to the brink of suicide.  When I did leave, my decision was made harder by my mother’s heartbreak and my father’s rage.  

Last year, I read the book “Heaven Up Here” by John Williams.  I was astonished by his honesty in chronicling his mission experience.  Although I never served a mission, I recognized much of his Mormon mentality in the young girl that I once was.  After reading his book, I cried.  I cried and I cried and I cried, hiding my tears from the world.  I had started writing about my Mormon experience six months before, attacking the subject with an honesty that I never dreamed I could talk about publicly.  And here was a man, living in the heart of Utah, married to a faithful Mormon woman, who had the strength to leave the Mormon Church and then to write about the good, the bad, and the messiness of his experience with a candor that I had never seen before.  He gave me hope that I too could one day be as honest.  

My family deals with my lack of belief through willful blindness.  And maybe this will never change.  But the burden of silence has been lifted.  I still don’t know what the full price of my honesty may be.  But the freedom is worth the price.  

 

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Yes, I believe the freedom is worth the price. You will be accepted, appreciated and loved by people who know and accept the real you, whether they are inside or outside your biological family.
"I have been keeping quiet, out of love for my family..." that's a compromise that a lot of people choose. Finding the words to respectfully express yourself is a life long investment that pays dividends.
Yes, great post! This is something I've been thinking of a lot lately as I've started to write more and post it on the web. Thanks for writing it.
That Mormon persecution complex is strong, and colors every interaction. Most outsiders don't understand that. I was raised Mormon too but I don't thinkk there was ever a time I truly believed, though I tried to for most of my formative years to convince myself that I believed.

There is an upside to being a self-involved ass like I am, which is that I left the church and didn't much give two wags what anyone else thought of it. It never crossed my mind to be suicidal.

I have toned down my criticism some, mostly where it's visible to family, at the request of my mother, who said that I should be more respectful of the religious beliefs of others. She was right. I wanted respect for my beliefs but I wasn't giving it.

These days, when I hear outsiders criticized Mormonism, it still riles me a bit. Not because they don't often deserve it, but because they are not one bit more fucked up than EVERY religion, with few exceptions. I mean, a Catholic criticizing Mormonism? How fucking rich is that?
Apparently quite a few of Brigham's descendents have been leaving the Church Sandra Tanner was also one of his great great grand daughters. She and her husband have been writing about them for quite a while now. He probably wouldn't be too happy about it if he were still alive to see this but I suspect that many more may speak out thanks to Mitt Romney's campaign.

Including his own cousin, Park Romney, that the mass media doesn't seem to be talking about too much.

Sorry to hear about your brother; how you deal with it is of course up to you but I don't think it would be out of line to stand up to him as much as he does you.
PM, I'll be watching to read more of your story, which is clearly still unfolding. Although I blog under my own identity, there's certainly a case for blogging under a pseudonym, as you do now. You can be more honest and forthright that way, and if you choose to do so later, you can publish previous work without the pseudonym. This may be just the right middle course for now.

Looking forward to more, and will now start catching up on what I've missed!
I think you owe it to yourself to establish your place within your family. You and your husband deserve respect as do the other members of your family. You wouldn't dream of treating them with any disrespect, much less inconvenience them. Unfortunately, I think you need to stop walking on eggshells and put your foot down. It may not be pretty at first, but it will hopefully alter the family dynamic in such a way that all may survive and receive what they need from one another.

I applaud your strength and courage to live your life the way your conscience dictates. More power to you and I look forward to reading about your progress. Beautifully written post.
jmac: Thank you. I think learning to stand up for myself in a firm but loving manner is a lesson I am long overdue for.

Paul: Thank you so much! I'm sure you have had your moments too, where you wonder if what you are doing is worth the price. But for what it is worth, I really enjoy your stories.

Cap'n: That was a lesson I have to learn as well. My husband is Hindu - he is very mild-mannered in his beliefs but they are an integral part to who he is. And at times, he has had to remind me that I need to respect the beliefs of others.

zachery: I am learning to stand up for myself but it can be a bumpy road sometimes, as I am not good at channeling my emotions into something effective.
Each of us is entitled to find our own way in this vast universe. I believe we all have more in common than we do apart; I wish your family could see and appreciate all the good in you. Peace.
Another really interesting look at life through your eyes from the other side. ~r
Thanks for sharing this. This gives me another perspective on my best friend, who like you, became disillusioned by and ultimately left the Mormon traditions... I hope you find a way to stand up to the disrespect shown your husband (and you!). Keep writing, and we'll keep reading!
I'm unsure if my understanding of my own experience will help you any, but that your mother never asked you what you believe had a familiar ring...

My ex-husband, neither thru our entire marriage, nor the year and a half beforehand, did he ask me what my specific beliefs were on life, afterlife, spirituality, or religion. I was a non-practicing quasi-catholic and he wished for us to attend a Southern Baptist church with his parents and grandparents. I did not have the words to describe my beliefs and non-beliefs, but he did not wish to know that either way.

Only after we decided the marriage was ending did a conversation spark regarding religion or sprituality. I took that spark and ran with it and he was surprised that i seem to have a better grasp on what his church had supposedly been trying to teach him his entire life.

My interpretation of such situations: If he was operating according to what he believed 'God' wanted, then it would have been important to know whether the person in his life also believed the same about 'God' therefore conversations would be welcomed and encouraged. Once discovering I would never yield to his understanding of Existence, he would cut his losses and seek someone who would.
However, If he were operating according to what he believed the People in his life wanted--parents, grandparents, churchpeople--than deliberately not opening that door to discussion was a higher priority than understanding his spouse. As a mere stand-in for any nameless 'wife', I was not seen as a person whose individual thinking was valued.
That who I am as a unique person might be more in line with "the divine order of things" than whether or not he was married to me never crossed his mind. And if it did, the decision was made that the persception of churchpeople is more important than the persception of the Deity they claim to hold above all others.
This is beautifully written. After I left, my mormon family has become more estranged from me (being a divorced woman in the mormon church didn't help matters). One sister will not talk to me or attend any family gathering where I am at. For the 5 years I have left the mormon church, not one single sibling has visited me in my home. Yet, they deny they are shunning me. Sigh.
With Romney running, you are gonna get a lot of cover picks here. Ex-Mormon stuff - and Mormon stuff as "history" - will be a great way for the MSM - and Salon - to go after him without looking like they are being unfair and attacking him for his religion.

BTW, I'm not a Mormon, will never be one, don't care if Romney is and if people don't like any religion, they should, like you, leave.
Daniel: Thank you.

Witchy: I love the name - I have a very good friend who is a witch. :) It's hard to stand up for yourself without getting angry but I am learning to draw the line.

Bernadine: Luckily, there are some people in my family who do, my mother being chief among them. :) And in the meantime, I think being more open will help, even if it is hard in the beginning.

Joan: Thank you.

Sarah: Unfortunately, my experiences are not unusual - I have also been trying to post my writing to ex-mormon forums. There are a lot of people out there in very similar situations to mine, which helps lend purpose to why I write.
dear postmormon girl, as a jewish guy living across the street from a mormon church in Taiwan, where the missionaries are at it 24/7, i can only say to you BRAVO and God bless. Never give up your quest for truth and freedom, and forgive those who don't understand you for they know not what they do. In fact, there is no God, never was, all these religions are a bunch of old wives tales and meshagus, the main thing is to love your neighbor and do unto others as you would have them do unto you. The rest is heresy. sigh, danny bloom 1949-2032
The hardest part of being a consultant is telling clients what they do not want to hear, but need to hear, about themselves or their organization. The reaction I get from different clients varies from reluctant acceptance to blatant outrage. Over the years, I have tried many ways to soften the blow, but have found that honesty and sincerity are the most diplomatic means of delivering feedback. Clients that react adversely to the empirical evidence and methodologically sound analysis I have provided them seem to suffer from a form of denial called cognitive dissonance. Ex-Mormons seem to suffer from a particularly potent form of cognitive dissonance

Although Festinger's (1957) theory of cognitive dissonance is no longer en vogue with motivational and organizational theorists, its framework continues to inform rational behavior. Cognitive dissonance refers to a situation involving conflicting attitudes, beliefs or behaviors. This produces a feeling of discomfort leading to an alteration in one of the attitudes, beliefs or behaviors to reduce the discomfort and restore equilibrium. Numerous studies (which can easily be found on ERIC, EBSCO, or JSTOR) have revealed a consistent pattern. For example, an individual who voiced hurtful opinions may feel ashamed or embarrassed since their actions conflict with their self-concept of being a caring or kind person. In such circumstances, a rational person might make a decision that maximizes their personal gain. If the relationship is important, then a rational person might apologize and make restitution for their hurtful actions. An irrational person, however, avoids making a decision, justifies their actions, and perpetuates the discomfort, by dwelling on it until they are emotionally overwrought. Often, the overwrought individual will try to escape the confines of their previous worldview and seek to construct a new one, one without the uncomfortable values, beliefs, or attitudes. The reason this is irrational because it fails to assess the validity of the individual's original values, beliefs, and attitudes and does not address or resolve the actual issue.

I am not unsympathetic to Ex-Mormons since I was a rather militant atheist throughout most of my collegiate experience and I understand the sting of cognitive dissonance well. Although some have labeled me as a cowardly apologist for the LDS Church, I actually concede the point that there are doctrines that appear to conflict, parables that aren't meant to be taken literally, esoteric allusions and beliefs beyond the normal range of Christian orthodoxy. I also admit that some pious Mormons leaders are fallible and petty. My analytic sensibilities pounced upon perceived doctrinal discrepancies and the apparent hypocrisy. I was full of venom and bile for imagined slights. My repudiation of the LDS Church was simply a juvenile attempt to declare my independence from weak-minded zealots who could not see that I was special, "I'm not part of your club, so I don't have to play by your rules!"

When it came down to it, I had said and done things that I knew were wrong. I had partaken of the tree, whose fruit was desirable to make one happy, but had cast my eyes about and was ashamed because of those who scoffed; and I had fallen away into forbidden paths. I had received the Holy Spirit, knew his goodness, and had driven him out. Try as I might, and I tried very hard, I could not fill the void I had created; there is nothing, except the Holy Spirit, which can fill that gap. Only a personal acceptance of Jesus Christ can truly ease the pangs of conscience because He is the only one that can grant real forgiveness. It is this knowledge of Christ’s atonement, deep inside every Ex-Mormon, that prevents them from moving on with their lives.

I know my comments will evoke bitterness and resentment. You are free to express your contempt below, but I hope that doing so is cathartic and will help you release the bile that is cankering your soul. I sincerely wish you well, and I pray that you find peace.
I am somewhat alarmed and yet amused by your brother's
boorish behavior. No Mormon i ever met would talk like that.
Rage from Dad, hm? Over the wayward daughter who
dare defy his (not really 'his', alas) will.
How about rage back at Dad for getting
you all twisted in the head by his
science fiction?

i have little tolerance for religion.
Wm. Blake, perhaps the most religious saintly poet
who ever lived, scoffed at churches: "synagogues of Satan"
he called them.

For those who have Faith,
in something or other,
and LIVE BY THEIR PRINCIPLES, i have utmost respect.

Someone like you. Belief is one thing, faith another.
Belief is clinging to an idea for dear life.
Faith is the open minded acceptance of whatever Life
will offer.
JMHO but I call your brother out on his behavior - he expects respect yet gives none in return. Call it for what it is - BS. Next time he brings meat into your house, tell him he can eat it outside.

Sounds as though he needs a good kick in the pants - you can decide front or back.

Hugs.

Rene'
Only Jew in a family of Protestants
Bless you (and not in the spiritual way...LOL). My sister ran off @ the young age of 18 and chased a LDS missionary that came knocking at our door. Obviously, when she left Annapolis *MD* and got to SLC, he wasn't around. She quickly found another LDS young man and was married by 19. 3 children by 22. Divorced and excommunicated 2x at 25. She being EXCOMMUNICATED still will not share the full story ... it breaks my heart how she was judged and although she wrote a letter to the president to be "released" - they excommunicated her first. How pathetic. Anyhow, thank you for being the brave woman you are. I do hope my sister will do the same one day.
Willful blindness - very descriptive of how your family deals with you and your views. The fear of losing your family must be paralyzing at times. It's hard to imagine how someone's beliefs (even religious beliefs) would come before one's children; but, I know it often does.

Pretty hot in Texas these days. Stay cool.
Its too bad you can't seem to move on. It seems that so many ex-mormons cannot define themselves in terms other than as ex-mormons. It is understandable because being Mormon is so all-consuming that it becomes a major part of a Mormon's identity. But until you can move on and leave the church alone, you will not be free of it.

I haven't read enough of your posts to know, but do you post anonymously? Does your family read your posts. I'm sure they have been able to figure it out no? It is so unfortunate that you can only satisfy your need for cartharsis by gossiping about your supposed loved ones in such a public forum. If you need to have a conversation with your brother or mother, give them a call, write them a letter. Why the need to publicly shame them? I understand the penchant people have these days for "exposing" the Mormon church because of the convenient political situation that makes anti-Mormon bigotry even more socially acceptable than it already was, but publicly humiliating specific individuals in ones own family is simply cold. Good luck being a bigger person.
"Willful blindness" sounds very much like the charge of "willful ignorance" I apply to some members of my family of origin. Your story has several parallels to my experience of coming out as a gay man, coming out of a repressive constricting theology. May you continue to walk with grace your own path. May speaking your truth empower and encourage further life.
Jewellya: Sometimes people care more about appearances than reality. Which is unfortunate but it is a fact of life. I'm sorry about your ex-husband.

Alecia: I'm really sorry you had to go through that; I hope things get better. People can really be in denial about their actions. (Myself included!)

Barbara: I'm just glad that the stories of ex-mormons are finally being told, as the Mormon Church is notoriously difficult to read. I have been wanting to tell my side of the story for years, as all of the mainstream talk about Mormonism describes a church that I never knew.
Another great post, pmg. I'm enjoying being a witness to your journey.
From your testimony, white supremacism seems to be an integral part of Mormonism, whether the cult -- er, church -- will admit that fact or not...

Anyway, I am happy that you are recovering. All of us human beings have to throw off some amount of bullcrap that we are taught, if not by our families and our communities, then by even the national culture at large. It takes bravery and courage to follow the truth and to do and believe what is right instead of to follow the herd! I do believe that it was Jesus himself who proclaimed that the right path is narrow, and that while many are called, only few respond...

I imagine that many if not most non-heterosexual Mormons have it even worse than you have had it. I mean, you had to conceal your non-belief; they have to conceal their sexual orientation perhaps also on top of non-belief.

Anyway, keep striving and keep writing.
I'm not sure how much of what you're dealing with is specific to Mormonism. I grew up and was very active in a mainstream Christian religion. In my mid-teens I began questioning my beliefs and by my late teens I had come to the realization that I really didn't believe in a God such as the ones worshipped by most organized religions. So, I quietly admitted that I was an atheist and since have lived my spiritual life as seems right to me. Since my family wasn't strongly religious, this occasioned only mild reaction. But, I have to say that my mother has never questioned me about my beliefs, either. Which is fine with me. I feel no compulsion to change the way she believes nor do I have any desire to have to defend my beliefs to her. I realize that things may be more difficult for you in a family where belief is stronger, but it seems that your mother accepts your decision and loves you anyhow. If you feel it's important for her to know about what you believe, why are you waiting for her to ask? Have you tried initiating the conversation yourself? And, if you have and she has refused, have you considered that this doesn't say that she doesn't love you, but rather that she prefers not to be put in a position where she might feel compelled to disagree with you openly or, conversely, that she herself is dealing with doubts and questions about her own beliefs that she chooses not to explore?

As for boors like your brother--they exist in all religions and among those without religious beliefs also. I don't think you can blame Mormonism for his obnoxious behavior.
I might be able to provide some insight. My daughter who is about the same age also left the church. As her step-father, I was extremely hurt and felt betrayed. This was the one thing that we shared together that she couldn't share with her father because he was a non-member. The mutual love of the gospel was something that made us closer and was uniquely ours. Leaving out the details, the way she left caused me much anxiety and pain. I was hurt not angry or in a rage. However, I can see how my attitude and actions could be interpreted as rage. Without going into great detail, I reacted negatively toward her and withdrew even more. She was in college at the time and we were not as close, so calling to talk to me was already unusual. She still called her mother and father frequently, but not me her step-father. She never really gave me an explanation for her actions in leaving the church. I had to find a way to let that go, but I couldn't get past my own pain. It took an illness that almost took my life to realize that I couldn't continue harboring all these negative feelings. They were killing me. I finally cried out to God for relief. Thankfully it came.
Some of the things that helped me get past her attitude and actions are to remind myself of the covenants that I've made with God and to pray for being able to let go of the hurt, anxiety and bitterness and find something good in her. In time, I was able to do this and feel love for my daughter once again. No, I don't approve of some of her attitudes, beliefs and behavior, but I've chosen to turn that over to God, and dwell on the positive things that my daughter does and believes. It took time and it wasn't easy, but I'm doing it and peace has entered back into our relationship.
If I can do it so can you and your dad. Good luck and God bless. I hope you find the peace you are looking for.
Negotiating an adult relationship with parents whose ideology is so different from your own is a challenge, and can last a lifetime. Sometimes when my dad gets going about the liberals, the gays, the....well, you know, the list is long...I tell him how hard it is to enjoy one another and our visit together if we go there. He's pretty good about snorting, then quieting down in agreement.

Your brother sounds like a tough case. That must really hurt your hubby. And he brings meat! I'm a vegetarian too, and dealing with meat for someone else is a huge gesture. I cut a ham for my dad. Nobody, nobody else could make me do that. You have a good heart about this, and it shows. You're figuring it out.
All I can say PMG is .... keep writing. Never stop writing. If your family & friends truly and honestly love you, they will stand by you and your husband. If not, then maybe it wasn't meant to be... It's like that saying, doors open and close in our lives, and we need to know when to shut some doors and open others.. Hang in there, Chick..love reading your insights.
All I can say PMG is .... keep writing. Never stop writing. If your family & friends truly and honestly love you, they will stand by you and your husband. If not, then maybe it wasn't meant to be... It's like that saying, doors open and close in our lives, and we need to know when to shut some doors and open others.. Hang in there, Chick..love reading your insights.
Tell your truth, but know there will be consequences. Just be ready for it and tell your story. Scary stuff for you, but I really liked this blog. You have important things to say.
Brigham Young fathered 57 children to 16 different women (several of whom were married to other living men) - because God told him to? 3 or 4 generations later I'm sure his direct descendants make up a large portion of the population of Utah.

I chose to remain silent about Moron-ism for 20 odd years after leaving the cult. I largely ignored the fact that several key members of my family were still caught up in the delusion.

Until I discovered the Moron involvement in Prop 8. This enraged me to the point of setting up my own website:
http://www.mormon.me.uk
Designed to give people access to the truth about the cult.

I have no interest in any kind of relationship with people who fund such a homophobic organisation, therefore the remaining Morons in my family are already dead to me.
Keeping silent out of love almost always means squelching our selves, our own identities. What a graceful path you've chosen, finding and keeping yourself, and maintaining your loving relationships with your family, never insisting that they take your path. That's truly remarkable. Lovely.
I know plenty of really noisy ones, but we all walk a fine line when it comes to family.
actually your brothers sound pretty much like most brothers or "certain" family finding small solace in some stupid point. Just small bumps in the road of life
After graduating from BYU and being a "faithful" member, I left when most people do, after they read the unsanitized history of the church. Having been a member for over 20 years, I finally learned about the stone in the hat trick and that Joseph Smith was indeed a polygamist with 11 teenage wives, 11 already married wives, and 11 other women just for good measure. In my opinion, the Mormon Church actively hides the crazy stuff and most everything about Joseph Smith because if he wasn't a prophet, then the whole thing was a huge con job. After reviewing literally thousands of documents, it is beyond obvious that Joseph Smith was a con man who loved women and money and that is about it. He is Warren Jeffs and David Koresh. The final nail in the coffin is the movie which is available on-line called The Book of Abraham. It is amazing that in 2012 millions of people will continue to delude themselves in the Mormon Fantasy World. I have never been happier being free of this cult.
Can't believe I missed this post... thanks for your honesty.
I have a brother who was a Mormon Bishop and is still totally active. Everything he and his family think, do, and say has a thread back to the Mormon Church. It is truly sad, because the Church is like the body snatchers, in my opinion, to many people. They keep justifying their entire existence as a gift from God because they are Mormon. Instead of actually experiencing life and different people from different religions backgrounds etc. After leaving the Mormons, I feel like our Universe and our world is even more beautiful and amazing. I try to be in touch with Universal truths - love one another, do unto others, and feed my sheep. I remain curious about everything and try not to be close minded. Best regards to all.
I hope you find peace within your family, but more importantly, within yourself.
When I left the church, my parents realized they would either have to accept me or lose me. That was twelve years ago. These days, I see the acceptance slipping. Every time I see my mother she has to make a comment about my coming back to the church someday. My father said at dinner the other night, "People who don't believe in God are lost." Meanwhile, I do my best to keep quiet and keep the peace. I try my best to respect their beliefs, while I know they will never respect mine. A great deal of my writing is fueled by this divide. I don't want to be silent, but I'm afraid of hurting them when I speak out. And everything I do say, in regards to this, does hurt them, because I've broken their hearts. We are lucky, outside of all this, to have a strong relationship. No family is perfect. Thank you for another excellent post!
postmormongirl,
i used your link to the daily beast piece by jamie reno to help update, as well as re-title a post i put up on the 6th with regard to Romney's gambling with getting away with lying and hypocrisy; specifically, with Romney's gambling that neither Mormons nor anyone of significant influence in the public sphere get Romney in a position where he has to publicly reconcile his Mormon ideology with his personal and financial connections to the emperor of the gambling (probably even prostitution) and financial empire of Sheldon Adelson. Since there are prohibitive 'guidelines' about gambling in Mormonism, to what extent can a professed Mormon like Romney circumvent such prohibitions before other Mormons call him on it?
I honor your efforts at honesty, being who you are and seeking to keep relationships with people who do not appreciate that you are being yourself.

In the whole scheme of things it is who you are and how you feel about yourself that matters most. You cannot make your family understand but in time you will see that if they don't come around, you will build your own family, with your husband, and with friends. Your life is an honest one. Many cannot say that.
Another fascinating account pmg. I know that family dynamics can be tricky but I'd be inclined to ask your bro why he would bring meat to your house when you would never consider bringing coffee to his. It's a fair question.
Being true to who you are and standing up for what you believe, going against the grain; is always the harder road to travel. But the trip is well worth it.

-r
Jesus' Parable of the Lost Sheep reflects our concern for those of our members who have gone astray. The Parable of the Prodigal Son relates to those lost sheep who have adopted a poor-choice life style.

Jesus loved all people and sought to help those who have gone astray to return to the fold. This can only be done with love but is an important part of true Christianity.

PCSmith
The LDS's biggest cover-up dates back to the 1857 massacre of 150 emigrants from Arkansas at Mountain Meadows in Utah Territory. I wrote a book informed by this event titled A Mormon Massacre. I'd like to present it to ex-Mormons. It's available for sale on Amazon, but I'll send anyone who wants to read or review it a free copy. Just email me at rinald47@hotmail.com. Thanks. Joe
The LDS's biggest cover-up dates back to the 1857 massacre of 150 emigrants from Arkansas at Mountain Meadows in Utah Territory. I wrote a book informed by this event titled A Mormon Massacre. I'd like to present it to ex-Mormons. It's available for sale on Amazon, but I'll send anyone who wants to read or review it a free copy. Just email me at rinald47@hotmail.com. Thanks. Joe
The LDS's biggest cover-up dates back to the 1857 massacre of 150 emigrants from Arkansas at Mountain Meadows in Utah Territory. I wrote a book informed by this event titled A Mormon Massacre. I'd like to present it to ex-Mormons. It's available for sale on Amazon, but I'll send anyone who wants to read or review it a free copy. Just email me at rinald47@hotmail.com. Thanks. Joe
The LDS's biggest cover-up dates back to the 1857 massacre of 150 emigrants from Arkansas at Mountain Meadows in Utah Territory. I wrote a book informed by this event titled A Mormon Massacre. I'd like to present it to ex-Mormons. It's available for sale on Amazon, but I'll send anyone who wants to read or review it a free copy. Just email me at rinald47@hotmail.com. Thanks. Joe
The LDS's biggest cover-up dates back to the 1857 massacre of 150 emigrants from Arkansas at Mountain Meadows in Utah Territory. I wrote a book informed by this event titled A Mormon Massacre. I'd like to present it to ex-Mormons. It's available for sale on Amazon, but I'll send anyone who wants to read or review it a free copy. Just email me at rinald47@hotmail.com. Thanks. Joe