Vacations can be exhausting. Why is that? Aren’t they supposed to be rejuvenating and relaxing? Not if you have kids.

First there’s the preparation. You’ve got to figure out what you need to take with you, and for your kids. Packing for your kids consumes most of your time because they need everything from multiple outfits (in case of spills or “accidents”), Tylenol or Benadryl (never go anywhere with kids without taking Benadryl), to things that keep them busy during travel time. Four hours later, you can actually pack for yourself. Maybe a toothbrush or clean underwear. I’m usually cramming things into the nooks and crannies of suitcases with space left that I forgot for myself. Like deodorant.

Next comes “scheduling” what you will be doing on vacation. By now, you’ve got your place to stay and a general idea of what your family will do, but if you are like me, you don’t leave anything to chance. Every single minute is planned so there is no wasted time or energy. Unfortunately, I sometimes forget about sleep on vacation.

Any parent will tell you that a kid who hasn’t gotten enough sleep is like a potential bomb that can go off at any second. This really puts a cramp in your every day life but on vacation, it’s even worse. Say for example, you take your family to Disneyland. The night before, you stayed up late doing some other fun activity and forgot that you had to get up early to fully take advantage of everything the “Magical Kingdom” has to offer (like the many lines of angry people waiting to get on rides). You might sail right through the first two hours with Mickey just fine, but then all hell brakes loose. Your precious five year-old son melts down in front of a thousand people because he didn’t get picked for the Jedi Training thing and did not get to fight Darth Vader.

But, I digress. I haven’t even gone into the fun journey to your vacation destination yet. If your family is attempting to save money, maybe a few bucks, you opt to drive rather than fly. While this seems like a good idea in theory, twenty minutes into your six-hour drive it begins: I’m hungry, I have to pee, How much longer is it, He took my coloring book, She’s poking me…you are ready to jump out the window (even at 70 miles per hour). Time seems to expand and stretch into some warped, alternative reality where whining is the way to communicate. Typically, the adult in the passenger seat (mommy) gets a crink in her neck from turning around to stop whatever is happening back there.

If you reach your destination with all your sanity in tact, you are ready to enjoy your vacation. This is where most people let their children run wild like rabid dogs. It’s all they can do to survive the week ahead of them. You’ll see kids overloaded on sugar, filthy, and confused meandering about but the parents are nowhere to be found. Well, they are usually in the bar drinking themselves into oblivion. Not that the Hubby and I did that or anything.

I’m happy to say that we actually did enjoy our vacation as a family. We are all home, safe and sound. However, the Hubby and I have a serious hang over that may last the rest of this month.

(Photo: Evil Erin)