Starring . . .
Hillary Clinton as June
Joe Biden as Ward
Rahm Emanuel as Wally
Stanley McChrystal as Eddie McHaskell
David Petraeus as Lumpy Rutherford
Barry Mathers as The Beaver
Tonight's Episode . . .
“Beaver Makes a Tough Decision”
Eddie McHaskell walks up the sidewalk to the Cleavers' new White House. He rings the doorbell. June Cleaver (in pearls) and Ward Cleaver (in a suit) let Eddie in.
Thats's a lovely foreign policy you have, Mrs. Cleaver.
You can stop with the flattery, Eddie. Mrs. Cleaver and I heard about what you wrote about us on the bathroom wall at school.
The Beaver was especially hurt about what you said about him, Eddie. He's very sensitive.
Gosh, I'm sorry, Mrs. Cleaver. I was just kidding around, honest. I'd never say anything intentionally hurtful about young Theodore. I have the highest respect for him and all his playfellows.
Wally comes running down the stairs.
Hi, Wally. I came to apologize to you and Theodore.
Can it, willya, Eddie? The Beaver's really had it with you this time, ya creep. He doesn't want to play with you, so get lost.
I think you'd better go now, Eddie.
Eddie leaves dejected.
Beaver comes downstairs.
Is Eddie gone?
Yes, Beaver, Eddie's gone. Now you and Wally are going to clean up the mess you made at Metzger's Field. With everything you left lying around when you were playing, it's dangerous for the people who live near there.
Gee, Dad, can't we just pretend we didn't make the mess? Metzger's Field is all the way at the other end of town.
No, Beaver, you can't just pretend.
Fade in to Wally and Beaver outside their White House, with trash cans and rags to clean up Metzger's Field.
Hey, Beav. Whaddaya say we stop off and get Lumpy Rutherford to help us clean up Metzger's Field, now that we can't hang around with Eddie?
Gee, Wally, I dunno. I guess it'd be okay. I sure hope he doesn't faint on us again.
Heck, Beav. Don't worry. Have you noticed how nothing really bad ever happens to us, even when it happens to other people?
I guess you're right. It's too bad the rest of the world isn't as lucky as us, huh Wally?
Close up on Beaver's smiling, optimistic face.