Cheese dumplings are a family recipe, passed down at least since Grandma Clark, (my great-grandmother). I have never seen anything remotely like them in restaurants; I think they are a German dish. 

Cheese dumplings are a delicacy. (As a general rule, delicacies are mostly fried insects. Cheese Dumplings are an exception to the delicacy rule.)

Ingredients:

12 or 16 ounce carton small-curd cottage cheese

1 package saltine crackers

1 stick butter or 1/2 cup margarine

2 cups all-purpose flour

1 or 2 eggs (my mother and I disagree about this. I always use two eggs. She uses one. I am a better cook than my mom, so that should settle it. But a nice non-judgmental rule of thumb would be if you cook a 12 ounce batch, then use one egg; 16 ounce batch, two eggs.)

 I'm not sure whether 1 stick of butter is the same as 1/2 cup of margarine. Somebody check me on that. But the exact amounts of some ingredients really don't matter.

Procedure:

Using a fork, mix the cottage cheese with  the egg(s). Mix in the flour, until the mixture resembles the consistency of really lumpy pie dough. Take about 1/4 of the floury dough, squeeze it into a ball--adding flour, as needed, to get the required consistency--and then roll it out into one long, round dumpling strand, about 1-2 inches in diameter. Repeat until you have four dumpling strands, lying on a bed of flour. Put the four strands side by side, and then flatten them on top. Sprinkle some more flour on top, and then slice them into squares, each about the size of little raviolis (1-1.5 inch squares)

  (Check out Screamin Mama's post about ravioli, if you would rather, at this point in the procdeure, make ravioli instead.)

 Rinse all the sticky dumpling goo off your hands and then boil some water in a large, deep sauce pan. While you are waiting for the water to boil,  clarify the butter in a large frying pan. Margarine doesn't clarify, so just melt the margarine. (I use margarine, but that's because I grew up eating margarine, because my dad sold margarine for Shedd-Bartush foods. My wife only eats butter. But she hates cheese dumplings, and there's no accounting for taste.) 

Crush the crackers into tiny bits. I do this while they are still inside of the wax paper package. Crushing cracker crumbs can be therapeutic. Pour the cracker crumbs into the margarine, and stir them until they are evenly coated. Fry the cracker crumbs over medium heat until they are a dark brown. Stir them from time to time. Remember not to burn them. (You will forget all about the cracker crumbs when you get involved with  the dumplings. Try not to neglect your crumbs!)

Put about half the dumplings into the boiling water, separating them as you drop them into the water. Boil them for six minutes. My mother will tell you to boil them until they float.   She is wrong about this! Boil them for EXACTLY six minutes. They will float at about five minutes, and they will still be gooey inside.

One reason I use two eggs is that the dumplings need to hang together for six minutes. (Remember: these things are made of cottage cheese, and it will have a natural tendency to disintegrate into little cheese bits if you cook them too long.) If you notice your dumplings are gooey in the middle when you begin eating them, it's because you listened to my mother. Six minutes.

After six minutes, begin extracting the dumplings from the hot water. Drain as much water as possible, because cheese dumplings aren't good served wet. I use one of those spoons with the holes in it. Then I put them on a large platter, on paper towels, which soaks up any excess water. I always check the first dumpling for gooiness by cutting it in half. If it is still gooey in the center, then I give the rest of them another minute or so.

Repeat this procedure with the other half of the dumplings. (Hey, I just realized this is really one of those things where you rinse and repeat!)

Take a look at your cracker crumbs. They are about to burn on the bottom, if they haven't already, so stir them again. Keep cooking the crackers until they are dark brown. My mother cooks the crackers until they are golden brown, but she doesn't even know how many eggs to use, so don't pay any attention to her. 

After you have extracted the 2nd set of dumplings from the water, it is a good idea to remove the paper towels from the serving platter. This can be tricky. I use the heavy-duty paper towels, which usually don't tear when I pull them out from under the dumplings.

 At this point you should have a platter full of dumplings. Apply the browned cracker crumbs over the top of the dumplings like you were icing a cake.

  Okay, so these crumbs came out golden brown. I take back everything I said about my mom. She is a wonderful cook!

Serve and eat.

There is nothing better than cheese dumplings. But they completely suck if they aren't coated with the browned cracker crumbs.The more cracker crumbs, the better. The dumplings themselves are really, really good, but never forget that they are really only a delivery system for the cracker crumbs.

I should point out that this updated cheese dumpling essay and photo spread was brilliantly documented by Laura, who, when asked to provide a little gratuitous nudity for my readers, politely declined.

 Everybody loves cheese dumplings. Except for my wife. She says they taste bland. But I contend she never gave them a chance, and I'm pretty sure the only time she ever tried them was once, twenty-five years ago,  when I didn't let them cook the full six minutes. Timing is everything.

I always fix cheese dumplings when my wife is out of town, or when my mother comes to visit.