Update (15:30 EST) OK, still quiet on the northern front. Israel's claim is that it has an enclave beyond the fence, and that UNIFIL recognizes this enclave even if Lebanon doesn't.  This enclave is between Israel's border fence and the international Blue Line border. To me this once again refle… Read full post »

Welcome to another installation of the Weekend Holyland Update, where we talk tough and retreat on all fronts, shedding Crocodile (Rock) tears. Please take your seats. We regret the electrical outtages that are to be expected - this time it's not our fault. Your inflight entertainment will include a… Read full post »

Two weeks after the Gaza flotilla fiasco, the surf is still frothing, and Israel has announced an international observer-studded inquiry committee to check what the hell happened out there in international waters. This is the Weekend Holyland Update, flight 061310, please fasten your seatbelts and se… Read full post »

Welcome to the Weekday Holyland Update, Flight 120209, Primordial Fear edition. Our tour today will fly over the realms of taboo expunging rituals, the suicidal two-step, a desperate ploy by a forgotten hack, political witch-hunts and Judicial arrogance. Please fasten your seatbelts as we are enterin… Read full post »

Personally? I don't count golf as a sport. Not on the same level as your major sports, core track and field or swimming. It's just not. It's an athletic endeavor, to be sure, but...

 

Leaving that aside, however, and even ascribing to the American-led PoV that counts the exploits of… Read full post »

Welcome, intrepid travelers, to Jehovah's beat up flying day-glo VW bus, painted blue, white, green, yellow and lotsa red, with the slogan "backwurds" on the front hood, carrying all sorts of dour pranksters careening at dangerous speeds over various scenery of great historic significance. This is th… Read full post »

My country has gone insane. Just letting y'all know in advance. Buckle up, and abandon all hope ye who do. This is the Weekend Holyland Update, flight 070509. Your inflight entertainment will include a rare sneak peak at a new Irish masterpiece in the making called “Ballad of Ramle Gaol”,… Read full post »

Welcome to Isra-hell. This is WHU flight 230609, and a very Merry (albeit belated) Solstice to all of you. At this point the captain would like to direct your attention to the windows as we are flying over a temporal anomaly vortex caused by a perfectly normal brain thrown off… Read full post »

Welcome to the Weekday Holyland Update flight 061109, where your in-flight refreshments will begin with a heart-warming tale of humanity towards bitter enemies, but quickly deteriorate to include bribery, theft, miscarriage of justice and other tasty morsels, as well as a reflection on one election i… Read full post »

Welcome to the Weekday Holyland Update charter edition. Fasten your seatbelts, we are heading for murky skies. 

Israel's most famous and successful TV personality, Dudu Topaz (born Goldenberg), has confessed, say police, to hiring thugs to beat up TV execs. These execs were selected for beat-do… Read full post »

The Capo di Tutti Capi of La Cosa Vaticana did a tour of my stompin' grounds, and the result has been much vomitus all around.

For his part, Benny the Dick refused to apologize for dissing Islam - any and all Islam, including Mohammad - in a speech some time ago (after… Read full post »

A 32 year-old Moscow man walked into this hairdresser's salon, waving a gun and demanding cash from the employees and patrons. Problem was that the 28 year old hairdresser took martial arts and was quite adept. So she disarms ole Ivan Dillingeryevich there, ties him up with the first power cord… Read full post »

I've been in several pretty dangerous situations, but I think the following takes the cake for sheer "Damn, that was too close for comfort".

 

It's the late 80's, I'm working as a scooter-riding messenger  in Tel Aviv, which means I spend my day committing traffic violations minor and majo… Read full post »

The commander of Israel's navy, (de)General Eli Marom, was caught at the Tel Aviv strip joint "go-go girls". At first Marom (nicknamed "Cheney", I kid thee not), tried to say (at his disciplinary hearing with the chief of staff, as well as to the media) that this was a one-time indiscretion.… Read full post »

Welcome to the Weekend Holyland Update for March 1st, 2009. The right wing in Israel is getting used to the idea that they will apparently have to, ya know, actually govern, all by their lonesome with no grown-ups to step in when stupidness is proposed – and apart from the judo-nazi…

Read full post »

WB to the Holyland Whenever the Hell it Happens in the Week Update.No coalition in Israel yet. Netanyahu can form a very narrow right-wing coalition tomorrow (ok, a week to iron out the loot distribution), but he doesn't want that coalition, cause he knows he won't be able to do a… Read full post »

OK, I got many requests (many is a relative term, yes?) to explain our electoral system, which must seem terribly convoluted to US readers. Unsurprisingly, most Israelis' eyes glaze over even before I get to the electoral college, so there.

Anyway, it goes like this:

There are 120 seats in Knesset

Elec… Read full post »

Latest post topmost. All times local. Subtract 7 hours for EST. Thank you for reading the now-completed live blog. 

02:57: OK, lets do a wrapup. Tzippi Livni of center party Kadima managed to stage a personal comeback and overtake Likud's Bibi Netanyahu at the finish line, with 29 seats to… Read full post »

You people think you know what it means to be a football fan. You wake up at noon on an off day, or watch the Superbowl at 6:30 pm. Where's the sacrifice in that?

I admit, I'm getting old. I no longer stay up at least half of the 17… Read full post »

Amro Musa, Chairman of the Arab League, is threatening to rescind the League's groundbreaking all-emcompassing peace and normalization offer of 2002 (reaffirmed 2007). This offer represents Israel's best and last, I fear, chance for true peace, as it answers all of Israel's concerns, leaving even the… Read full post »

Israeli public opinion, while still of the opinion that this operation was a good idea, is moving decidedly to the "OK, we're done here" view, as my good friend and mentor Shai Golden put it in Haaretz's "This Week" supplemnent's main hed today.

But as any student of history knows,… Read full post »

So, both we and the execrable hamas (aka "the kids in the sandbox") sent a big middle digit to the rest of the world, and its "chill the fuck out da both of youze" message. Hamas does it pursuant to the strategy I have already laid out in a previous post… Read full post »

The rumor mill (supported to some extent by foreign sources) has it that Israel suffered six soldiers killed and 30 wounded in Gaza tonight. Foreign sites are saying 3 killed, same number wounded. Not a word about it is on any Israeli site. In Israel, it is customary to defer to… Read full post »

Israel's Minister of Defense, Labor Chairman Ehud Barak, is up (along with his party) by five seats and 44%, from 11 to 16, in opinion polls since the start of the war. Most Israelis are pretty much united behind the basic justice of AN action, and too fed up to pay… Read full post »

Israel has officially entered "war's on, dissent would be untasteful" mode. We're bombing the shit out of Hamas - and out of the civilians in the way, which makes the whole equation a lot messier. I think Hamas brought this on itself - with generous help from Israel and its Napoleonic… Read full post »