wow, i did not know this!
rated!

Hay Zenu ole buddy howz it going? How R our plans for world takeover 1 scientologist at a time.

Gorlockness,

Rest easy - Xenu's plans hit a bump in the road, because after he pulled off his evil population control deed - which by the way happened about 75 million years ago - he was overthrown and locked in an "electronic mountain prison" (possibly here on Earth) and he's been trapped there ever since!

LuluandPhoebe,

- definitely NOT Tom Cruise under there. Understandably, Scientologists are a bit reluctant to talk about Xenu since it makes them look batshit crazy! Apparently some Scientology detractors like to dress up as Xenu and show up at Tom Cruise or John Travolta movie premiers!

And Wikipedia discloses the goods for free. Now I'd say that is a real public service. And who would have guessed that Xenu is behind our health care mishagosh? Thank you, Wikipedia!

Wow, the things you learn on OS!!

yes...strange "doctrine"...but in all fairness the doctrine of Scientology I think, is something of a less-than-relevant backstory. And I think that they're trying to distance themselves from it to a certain degree - and focus on the wonderful, life changing insightst that people gain from going to their wacky classes.

But seriously - if anyone's tempted to take one of those free personality tests and go to a seminar or whatever it is - read up a bit on Scientology first so you have an idea of what you're getting into - it's pretty wacky...those disembodied spirits that were created by those explosions are called "thetans" and bunches of them have apparently attached themselves to each of us. and so the goal with Scientology is to get rid of those thetans - and that's accomplished by all manner of wacky things that are beyond the scope of this post...

Ah the "stress test" to detect thetans in my body... good times. I think I may have made the "tester" cry. Xenu would not approve.

Better read fast, because those Scientologists are rough and they work at the speed of light. We're talking $10,000 a level in income, here!

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Wait, I don’t get it. If the Thetans are the spirits of Xenu’s innocent victims, why are they trying to give us all pneumonia? It seems like if they really are as malicious as all that, maybe Xenu had the right idea. Or did they only become toxic leeches post-explosion? Is that why Xenu collected them with his electric ribbon? Or did they only decide to make people sick after sitting through 36 days of Xenu’s home movies?
Where do the Thetans go after they’re removed? Some other person’s body? Martian report station? Back to the Galactic Confederacy?
I really wish that wikipedia entry was a little more extensive.

David,

Yes, I guess all religions' doctrines sound a bit wacky when you deconstruct them! But what really separates this one and makes it funny is the whole "sci-fi" theme - truly a religion for the 20th century!

Personally I believe all religions are metaphors for an underlying spiritual truth that we consciously aren't capable of understanding. And like others, Scientology does in fact cover the basics: 1) we're screwed up, 2) here's why and 3) here's how we fix it. But the metaphor it uses is a bad sci-fi story instead of some other ancient myth.

But unlike many other religions I think that behind it all, it is basically a shameless money grab - a religion created purposely to attain power and separate people from their cash!

Transition girl,

Yes, quite a tangled web they weave and I wish I had those answers...perhaps a bit more research is in order...I went back and put a link in the post to the Operation Clambake website, which provides details about the insidious mechanisms used by Scientology and also more information on what they believe.

I haven't read it all, but I don't recall any mention of where those thetans go once you remove them, or why the "pneumonia curse" thing...

strange indeed....

Ooh fins you have done it now. OS will now become a target for Scientology lawyers and other nuisances. The Scientologists do not like to be mocked. This should be fun.

Meanwhile, has anyone else noticed a plethora (my ten cent word for today) of crap like the "comment" below from agatha lynn? There are a whole host of these dimwits popping up on OS with their commercial spam. Where they are actual postings, I have been flagging them.

this is why churches should be taxed

GeeBee,

yeah, I've heard that the Church of Scientology, historically, has responded like a pack of killer bees to websites that criticize them or post their doctrine/materials online...but I can only imagine that at this point the horse is so far out of the barn that they can no longer keep up the good fight!

But, after reading a couple of horror stories I did have a few fleeting images in my brain of crazed Scientologists tracking me down and well...let's not go there.

I guess I can only hope that they have bigger fish to fry or that OS will incur the brunt of their wrath and they'll leave little ol' me alone!

marcelleqb,

agree - i think churches perform a certain function in our society and all that, but perhaps it's about time to tax them, or at least put rules in place that govern how much wealth they accumulate. I don't have a problem with them collecting money and then running soup kitchens, but I don't see how they should be allowed to create vast financial and real estate holdings, while at the same time calling themselves charities.