(Barbara, on left, the year she left) 

“Some families live in denial about a relative with mental illness.” 

This quote is from one of the several books I recently read, books dealing specifically with bipolar disorder.  Back in the late/… Read full post »

(Barbara has her hands on my shoulders) 

All this writing about Barbara has unlocked some things, some memories that were tucked away.  She was, in fact, very much back in our lives between the time that she ran away and the visit I made to Trumbull in my ice-cold VW.

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“How many different things a family can be – a nest of tenderness, a jail for the heart, a nursery of souls.  Families name us and define us, give us strength, give us grief.  All our lives we struggle to embrace or escape their influence.  They are magnets that both/… Read full post »

Well, it's Friday and so, on our local NPR station, here comes Story Corp.  Most of you probably know about Story Corp, about the interviews that are recorded all over this sometimes great nation of ours.  A couple of years ago Michele and I went down to Roanoke and sat in… Read full post »

An envelope arrived in the mail today from one of my California sisters.  In it were  copies of two letters that my grandfather had written to his daughter, my mother.  The first is on hotel stationery – The Roney Plaza Hotel, Miami Beach.  He was, apparently,/… Read full post »

His wife was the one, she of the encouraging words.  Back in February when he thought he might never get out of bed again, she was the one talking about spring.  She was the one talking about sun and warmth and, yes, the lawn.  He heard whispered/… Read full post »

 It was either 1983 or 1994, I can't remember.  I was in the Whole Foods in the Valley or it might have been Ralph's on Sunset.  I was killing time between auditions and wandering the air-conditioned aisles of one of the two stores mentioned when suddenly there was… Read full post »

My mother (still hard to believe) is no longer, physically, with us.  While she was living I did my best to keep our relationship on an even keel.  I did this, partially, by refusing some of her wishes, no matter how well-intended or how much sense they made.  When I/… Read full post »

The question has been asked several different ways: name a famous person  from the past you'd like to have lunch with; what would you do to change the course of history?; if you could travel back in time, where would you go?

Good questions with as many answers as there are… Read full post »

While yesterday's post was, in some small way, an homage to my wife, today's is more direct.  As Mrs. Loman (Arthur Miller, really) so succinctly put it, "Attention must be paid."

Eighteen years ago about 40 people, most all of them family, gathered in the Santa Rosa back yard of my sister… Read full post »

Growing up, Sunday mornings were spoken for.  It was eight o'clock or ten o'clock mass and there was no getting out of it...until my sisters started driving.  One of us would run in for a program (proof of "attendance") and then we'd go grab some cruellers at Bongo's and hit the r… Read full post »

In 1975 I put all my belongings, or most of them anyway, into and onto my '69 VW and headed for California, specifically the Bay Area.  My mother's brother, Uncle Bob, had offered his spare bedroom in Sausalito and well, it seemed like a good idea at the time.  Just like… Read full post »

"I need to see your license and registration, please."

"Yes sir, Officer.  I have it here somewhere."

"I hope you do, son."

"Isn’t it interesting, Officer, that although I’d bet I’m older than you are, you just called me 'son'?"

"Not to me it&rsqu… Read full post »

"I'll need to see your license and registration."

"Here you are, Officer."

"Do you know why I pulled you over, Mr. Newark?"

"No, sir, I don't."

"Funny, I thought you people knew everything."

"Excuse me?"

"Can you tell me the speed limit along this stretch here, Mr. Newark?"

"Well, I believe… Read full post »

Here we are, back in the library and all of us feeling good about ourselves.  I think.  The kids can get surly, not with me so much but with one another.  Brush fires of emotion ignite but are, for the most part, quickly extinguished.  I've thanked each block so far and… Read full post »

This exciting update:

Just moments ago I added a brand new sign-out sheet to the clipboard.  Students must sign out and take the clipboard with them when they go to the restroom.  And go to the restroom they do, in a nearly constant stream.  (Well, maybe that's not the best wording...)… Read full post »

After three years of subbing exclusively at the elementary school I got a call from the 11th grade English teacher.  He asked if I could do a four-day stint at the high school this week.  I gulped and said, "Sure."

Big kids are different after all.  They're my size and larger,… Read full post »

I can't recall how I stumbled upon Nuala O'Faolain, just a happy accident I guess.  As someone who strives to live and write with honesty, she blew me away.  I implore you to read both of her memoirs "Are You Somebody?" and "Almost There" and then go ahead and enjoy the… Read full post »

Preston's got game.

He spent his early years in Playa del Rey, California where on top of the parking garage there was a basketball court.  I took him up there on pretty much a daily basis to tire him out before nap time.  Just lifting the ball was a chore for him… Read full post »

It's a "behind" year for us.  You know, some are better than others.  Christmas always comes right after Thanksgiving, doesn't it, so no surprise but still...

Michele's 50th birthday was on the 3rd of December and the boys and I made big plans, surprises, all of which we pulled off with… Read full post »

I went to the gym this morning not only because of yesterday (Thanksgiving) and all I ate but also because it was "on the schedule."  Here in our small town the gym is never really busy and so I settled in on the stationary bike and got after it.

Not long… Read full post »

Just because he might, someday, read this I thought I'd better include Cooper.  I mean, his big brother got a blog, why not him?  As the younger brother he often compares himself and many of his sentences begin "How come Preston...?"

How come, indeed?  I grew up in a house with… Read full post »

He's fifteen years old and has, at brief times, all the wisdom of the world.  More often, he has none of it.  So my wife and I get speeches and the most common one begins and ends with "Why can't I make my own decisions?"

The thing is, he can and… Read full post »

In February of 1983 my oldest sister, Barbara, was in a psychiatric facility on Long Island.  It was the last stop in a downward spiral: from living on the street to staying with one of her siblings to staying with an aunt and uncle to this, the Long Island facility.  According… Read full post »

Forgot I was getting blood work today and so, supposed to fast.  Out of habit the coffee was already on, in the middle of making school lunches for my sons plus a friend who is staying with us while his parents attend to an ailing pair of parents/grandparents.  Just the usual… Read full post »