Robert Kelley's Blog

A View From Left Field
SEPTEMBER 14, 2010 12:40PM

Blog has moved

For those of you who have been kind enough to read my posts, I thank you.  I have come to the conclusion that I'd rather not post under my real name for a variety of reasons- don't want to piss off any relatives or catch shit at work or give inspiration… Read full post »

SEPTEMBER 8, 2010 1:24PM

Time To Forget September 11?

Wait a minute.  Put down those pitchforks and torches.  Stop heating that tar barrel and put those feathers away.  Let me explain.  What a preposterous thought, you might say.  Indeed, it does seem outrageous, even treasonous.  But let me explain how I came to this concl… Read full post »

AUGUST 30, 2010 2:32PM

Before You Forward That Email....

Yes, I know.  That forward button is just sitting there, just aching to be pushed.  But please, before you do, please consider….


Nothing magical is going to happen if you do.   Bill Gates is not going to give you a laptop.  You aren’t going to see a spec… Read full post »

AUGUST 26, 2010 12:03PM

The Wrong Place, The Wrong Time

No, I’m not talking about Park 51.  I’m talking about Glenn Beck and his rally at the Lincoln Memorial on August 28.  On the 47th anniversary of the “I Have A Dream” speech, the party of White Christian Racists will be having an orgy of hate in the shadow of the… Read full post »

AUGUST 16, 2010 8:35AM

Republican Party Application

Republican Party Application



Name: _________________________



Sex (excuse us, gender)

/_/  Male

/_/  Female (attach permission note from husband)




/_/   White

/_/   Caucasian

/_/   Honky

/_/  &nbsRead full post »

I understand that your panties are filled and/or in a twist about building a mosque two blocks from Ground Zero.  You don’t hate Muslims, you say, but it sure is “insensitive” of them to build it so close to “sacred ground”, considering what “they” did t… Read full post »

AUGUST 9, 2010 9:38AM

The Caste System of College Football

I can’t wait for college football to start.  Will my beloved Michigan State Spartans go 12-0 and head to the title game?  Probably not.  But until they actually lose a game, I have high hopes.  But really, not everybody has realistic hopes.  Not everybody has any hope,… Read full post »

AUGUST 3, 2010 12:05PM

The Real Battle Is About To Begin

We’ve seen the preliminary bouts.  We’ve heard the warm-up bands.  Now the main event is about to start.  The Bush tax cuts will expire unless action is taken to extend them.  This is where the Republicans get to make good on all those campaign contributions.  Thi… Read full post »

Before I start attacking Mitch’s position on estate taxes, let me state first that he is obviously a very talented writer as attested by his book sales.  I also think he’s a pretty decent sports writer and until they moved his show time, I’d listen to him on WJR on my… Read full post »

JULY 15, 2010 1:58PM

Rush Limbaugh and The Boss

DISCLAIMER:  I’m a lifelong Yankee fan, so my opinion of George Steinbrenner is not entirely unbiased.


In the past week, the Yankee family has lost longtime voice Bob Sheppard and owner George Steinbrenner.  Sheppard was universally loved, it was said that his diction was so… Read full post »

What would you fill in that line with?  My first answer I guess would be Republicans, yet that would be unfair to those Republicans (there are some out there) that aren’t bigots.  Maybe I’d use the term “Right Wingers” or maybe “Teabaggers”.  Really,… Read full post »

JUNE 29, 2010 3:09PM

Summer, Would You Please Go Away?

July is almost here.  I’m still mowing my grass every 3, 4, or 5 days depending on the weather.  I’ve mowed enough.  Summer, either lay off the rain or the heat.  Preferably both.  Don’t go raining three days in a row and then force me to go out and mow when… Read full post »

Stanley McChrystal suffers from the heartbreak of foot-in-mouth disease.   He may also consider himself so indispensable that he and his aides felt no need to constrain their language and allowed themselves to violate the UCMJ in their remarks about their civilian and Pentagon superiors.&nbRead full post »

JUNE 18, 2010 12:58PM

This Isn’t The Eighteenth Century

I wish I had invested in colonial costumery prior to the election of Barack Obama.  I could have made a fortune renting them to the rubes that show up at Tea Party rallies.  That and show up with a box of teabags and a stapler and for a buck a bag,… Read full post »

JUNE 10, 2010 11:51AM

Good Luck, Tom Izzo

Once again around these parts (Michigan State University) it’s time for the annual Tom Izzo speculation.  Will he go?  Will he stay?  One thing remains certain, he will make more money this year than he did last year.  And if he can get it, more… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
JUNE 2, 2010 11:39AM

Time To Face Up To Some Things


Every election, the candidates tell us what we want to hear, regardless of whether it bears any resemblance to reality.  The voters eat it right up, selling their votes to the candidate with the best promises.  It’s all a charade, the candidates know they don’t mean what… Read full post »

Every so often you see a story that just makes you shake your head and wonder where the sanity is in the world.  Granted, the truly outrageous events occurred in 1997, but it really wasn’t that long ago, was it?  Check out the story: full post »

There are some great unanswered questions in life.  Things like “What does God have against people in trailer parks?” and “Why do the French think Jerry Lewis is funny?”  Those didn’t get answered last week.  But there were two great questions that did, na… Read full post »

Hey, muttonhead.  You graduated from Harvard.  You got a law degree from Yale.  You had a fellowship at Cambridge.  You clerked on the Supreme Court.  You were an aide in the Nixon White House.  You served in the state House and Senate.  You’re the state AG.&nRead full post »

MAY 17, 2010 3:14PM

Response to Pilgrim's Open Call

1.   What is your favorite word? Free

2.   What is your least favorite word? Death

3.   What turns you on? Being loved

4.   What turns you off?  Hateful people

5.   What sound or noise do you love?  Birds chirping

6.   What sound oRead full post »

This is something that threatens the very integrity of the space-time continuum.  I’m glad I was sitting down as I got the news, as I immediately became light headed.  Glenn Beck, usually a fear-monger, said something correct, intelligent, and courageous.  Will wonders never ceas… Read full post »

APRIL 30, 2010 11:03AM

Spill, Baby, Spill

I’m going to resist the temptation to say “neener, neener, neener” to all the stooges who chanted “Drill, baby, drill” in 2008.  I’m sure you meant well and all, but you were simply misinformed, just as you are on global warming.  Let me put it simply:&nbRead full post »

APRIL 28, 2010 10:13AM

The Tea Party Songbook

Announcer:  "LIVE from the Tea Party convention, let’s bring out Robert Kelley for some great teabagging tunes…."








Please ladies, stop throwing your underwRead full post »

APRIL 15, 2010 3:31PM

Only Pawns In The Game


Only Pawns In The Game


By now, all you need to do is say “Tea” and we all know who we’re talking about.  You can call them Tea Partiers, you can call them Tea Baggers, I prefer the Tea Klux Klan (or TKK for short).  But… Read full post »

APRIL 14, 2010 2:42PM

How I Would Rule On The Phelps Case

Of course, we can't ask any potential nominee about how the case of the nutty military funeral protester should be resolved, since they cannot comment on cases that will or may come before the Court.  But since my probability of being nominated is only theoretically greater than my probability o… Read full post »