My Take

by Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish
Malibu, California, USA
October 01
Rubbish In, Robish Out!
Johnny Robish is an actor, stand-up comic and joke/humor writer who lives in Malibu, California. Most recently, Johnny had a weekly humor column entitled “Kauai Komedy” in The Garden Island, Kauai’s main newspaper before moving back to Malibu. A committed writer, Johnny has often stated that “the only time I’m really happy is when I’m sitting in front of a typewriter. Unfortunately, there are no typewriters anymore, so I’m just miserable all the time.” A favorite at comedy clubs all over the western United States, Johnny’s humor has also been published in such diverse venues as the LA Times “Laugh Lines”, medical journals, trade publications, dozens of company newsletters, humor magazines and numerous internet sites such as The Malibu Patch, Curve Wire,, AARP, DailyComedy.Com, FunnyFirm.Com, How Sick Is That? and Peter Bergman’s Radio Free OZ which also features TV’s John Goodman, Edie McClurg and Paul Krassner. Johnny has also written for road comics including Taylor Negron, Mel Kohl, Marti Schauer and Jere Evans.

Johnny Robish's Links

Scores of Keith Urban’s Fans Treated for Alcohol-Related Issues:  Local officials say forty-six fans have been treated for serious alcohol-related medical issues at a recent Keith Urban concert outside Boston.  Paramedics, treating the stricken, say they are horrified to think that Ke/Read full post »

Aretha Franklin Told She Can’t Eat Takeout Food Inside Restaurant:  Queen of Soul Aretha Franklin reportedly got into a verbal altercation with an employee at a Lewiston, N.Y. Johnny Rockets after she was told that because she had ordered her burger for takeout, she wasn’t permitted/Read full post »

Walmart’s Great Value Ice Cream Sandwiches Don't Melt:  Ice cream is supposed to melt, but WCPO in Cincinnati is reporting that Walmart’s Great Value Ice Cream Sandwich apparently doesn’t, after a local women’s son left one sitting out on their patio table for 12 hours in/Read full post »

Man Sues After Doctors Remove Penis During Circumcision:  A medical malpractice suit filed in Birmingham, Ala. claims that doctors at an area hospital amputated a man’s penis without his consent while he was unconscious for a circumcision operation.  Seems like people will sue over anRead full post »

George Harrison Memorial Tree Killed by Beetles:  In a sad bit of irony, its being reported that a tree planted in Los Angeles’ Griffith Park in honor of former Beatle George Harrison, has died due to an “infestation of beetles.”  Are they positive that the tree is dead?&n/Read full post »

Hawaii Urges Maui Residents to Watch Out for Suspicious Plants:  The Hawaii Department of Agriculture, in an effort to control invasive plant species on Maui, is urging all residents to report any suspicious species of plants they may come across.  Now Willie Nelson has a place on Maui - if/Read full post »

Groups Argue Lead Ammo Should Be Regulated:  Environmental organizations are petitioning the Environmental Protection Agency to regulate lead in ammunition as a toxic substance, pointing out that eating something that was shot with a lead bullet can lead to crippled motor coordination, severe di/Read full post »

Ohio Town Insists Veteran Get Rid of His Therapy Ducks:  An Army veteran in West Lafayette, Ohio is in trouble with city officials who are demanding he get rid of the 14 ducks he has been raising on his property as a form of therapy after sustaining a back injury in/Read full post »

Some Human Laws Now Being Extended to Pets:  With pets now being viewed less as property and more like part of the family, legal experts say laws are changing to extend some of the legal rights humans possess to their pets.  Yea, well if that’s really the case, would mind telling/Read full post »

JULY 18, 2014 11:59PM

Tim McGraw Smacks Woman at Concert

Tim McGraw Smacks Woman at Concert:  Video footage shows country singer Tim McGraw smacking a women who grabbed his crotch as he ventured out into the crowd while singing a song during a recent concert.  On a positive note, fans say that after the incident, Tim was able to effortlessly hit/Read full post »

Mysterious Giant Hole Forms In Siberia:  Scientists say they’re baffled as to what could have caused a gigantic hole spanning 262 feet in diameter recently discovered in Siberia - the depth of which is not yet known.  Researchers are looking into the possibility that this hole may fin/Read full post »

California Man Charged With Stealing Beeswax:  In what local police say is their first arrest for pilfering the gooey substance, a 26-year-old California man has been charged with stealing nearly 200 pounds of beeswax from the beekeeper who employed him and selling it to support his drug habit.&/Read full post »


Woman Shoots Man in Face as They Enter Tacoma Starbucks:  An unidentified man in Tacoma, Washington is recovering after being shot in the face by a 24-year-old-woman as they appeared to be walking into a Starbucks together.  Legal experts say there’s a chance the woman may go f/Read full post »

Woman on Meth Rampage Destroys Seattle Condo:  A Seattle couple returned to their condo to find it completely trashed destroyed, only to find a 27-year-old woman hiding under their bed on what police described described as a "meth rampage.”  So far, there’s been no word on wheth/Read full post »

Corpse Falls Out of Coroner’s Van Onto Busy Street:  A coroner's van being driven down a busy road in Feasterville, Pa. had a door malfunction, allowing a dead body to slip out and roll down a road into traffic outside of a busy shopping center.  Talk about “this traffic is kill/Read full post »

Women in Red May Spur Female Jealousy:  A new study found that women perceive other women wearing red as a potential threat to their relationships, seeing her as more interested in sex than women wearing other colors.  This is in contrast to other studies, which found that some women are ju/Read full post »

Red Hair Gene Facing Extinction Due to Global Warming:  Dr Alistair Moffat, managing director of ScotlandsDNA, is claiming that red heads are facing extinction due to global warming.  As proof, he points out that they’ve already completely disappeared from NBC’s The Tonight ShowRead full post »

Astrophysicists Say Universe Missing 80% of Its Light:  Astrophysicists say they are mystified after noticing 80% of the light that’s supposed to be in the universe appears to be missing.  Well, church donations are down, perhaps God couldn’t afford to pay the electric bill.&nbs/Read full post »

Adults Without Landlines More Likely to Become Heavy Smokers and Drinkers:  A new study found that adults in the US without landlines are more likely to be smokers and heavy drinkers.  A related study found that people are more likely to want to drink heavily after they read about studies l/Read full post »

Pelagornis Declared Largest Bird to Ever Fly:  A giant, winged fossil discovered near the Charleston airport has been declared a new species and just may be the largest flying bird to ever live with a wingspan of 24 feet.  Scientists say these birds were so large, the Flintstones would have/Read full post »

Study Claims Snoring Poses Cancer Risk:  According to a study out of University of Wisconsin-Madison, sleep apnea -- a sleep disorder associated with heavy snoring -- is also associated with a higher risk of developing cancer.  Perhaps, but I have a feeling the threat of a snorer being kill/Read full post »

World’s Earliest Erotic Graffiti Art Found on Greek Island:  A specialist in prehistoric archaeology has found what is believed to be the world’s earliest erotic graffiti art - racy inscriptions and large phalluses carved into a rock on the Greek island of Astypalaia.  He presum/Read full post »

Convicted Killer Joran van der Sloot Gets Married in Prison:  Joran van der Sloot, who was convicted of killing a Peruvian woman and is considered by many people to also be responsible for the death of 18-year-old Natalee Holloway back in 2005, has gotten married to a woman he met and/Read full post »

Icelandic Girl Denied Passport Because Her Name Is Harriet:  Iceland recently denied 10-year-old Harriet Cardew's passport renewal request because her first name doesn't comply with the 1853 approved female names listed in the Icelandic baby naming laws.  While this law may seem petty to so/Read full post »

JULY 3, 2014 8:24PM

The Weather Channel Turns 30

The Weather Channel Turns 30:  Beginning as a rather unique concept, the Weather Channel is celebrating its 30th birthday by airing special programming looking back at its 30-year journey.  While everyone publicly seemed in a celebratory mood, privately staff members admitted that its been/Read full post »