My Take

by Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish

Johnny Robish
Malibu, California, USA
October 01
Rubbish In, Robish Out!
Johnny Robish is an actor, stand-up comic and joke/humor writer who lives in Malibu, California. Most recently, Johnny had a weekly humor column entitled “Kauai Komedy” in The Garden Island, Kauai’s main newspaper before moving back to Malibu. A committed writer, Johnny has often stated that “the only time I’m really happy is when I’m sitting in front of a typewriter. Unfortunately, there are no typewriters anymore, so I’m just miserable all the time.” A favorite at comedy clubs all over the western United States, Johnny’s humor has also been published in such diverse venues as the LA Times “Laugh Lines”, medical journals, trade publications, dozens of company newsletters, humor magazines and numerous internet sites such as The Malibu Patch, Curve Wire,, AARP, DailyComedy.Com, FunnyFirm.Com, How Sick Is That? and Peter Bergman’s Radio Free OZ which also features TV’s John Goodman, Edie McClurg and Paul Krassner. Johnny has also written for road comics including Taylor Negron, Mel Kohl, Marti Schauer and Jere Evans.

Johnny Robish's Links

New list
DECEMBER 18, 2014 12:03AM

Alpha Women Found to Be Equally Adulterous

Alpha Women Found to Be Equally Adulterous:  Powerful men such as Dominique Strauss-Kahn, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Tiger Woods have become known for their sexual exploits, but a new study found that women who hold executive-level positions are no different.  The lesson here is that while mone/… Read full post »

DECEMBER 16, 2014 11:42PM

London Sewer Cleaners Fighting Fatbergs

London Sewer Cleaners Fighting Fatbergs:  Every day beneath the streets of London, sewer technicians are fighting a grim war against giant 'fatbergs' - or accumulated fat pockets in the sewers caused by people dumping grease such as turkey fat down their sinks - which clog the system and threate/… Read full post »

New Jersey Bans Smiling on Drivers License Photos:  The state of New Jersey announced that it will begin banning people from smiling on their driver's license photos.  State officials say they don’t expect the ruling to create much controversy, considering the fact that if you’r/… Read full post »

DECEMBER 14, 2014 9:13PM

Dinosaur Die-Off Led to Bigger Mammals

Dinosaur Die-Off Led to Bigger Mammals:  New research shows the great dinosaur die-off paved the way for mammals to explode in size, some becoming quite massive.  So if your spouse ever complains that you’re putting on a few pounds, I suggest blame it on the dinosaurs.

Dinosaur Die-Off 

&… Read full post »


Pastor Protests Gay Marriage With Horse in Wedding Dress:  A Mississippi pastor brought a horse in a wedding dress to stand with him outside a federal courthouse in Jackson to protest a federal judge's ruling to overturn the state's ban on gay marriage.  You have to wonder if the guy/… Read full post »

DECEMBER 13, 2014 12:44AM

Pope Proclaims Dogs Welcome in Heaven


Pope Proclaims Dogs Welcome in Heaven:  During a recent appearance in St. Peter’s Square, the Pope surprised many by telling a boy mourning the death of his dog, that “one day we will see our animals again” and that “paradise is open to all of God’s creatures/… Read full post »

DECEMBER 11, 2014 9:05PM

Thousands of Crows Invade Ohio Town

Thousands of Crows Invade Ohio Town:  Its estimated that up to 50,000 crows have invaded the western Ohio town of Springfield, causing some residents to compare the situation to Alfred Hitchcock’s movie "The Birds" as they work to drive them away.  They’re estimating as many as/… Read full post »

Mystery of the Origin of Earth’s Water Deepens:  The mystery of where Earth's water came from just got murkier when some astronomers essentially eliminated comets as the source, because the water is consider to be too heavy.  If you ask me, I think we should be investigating where Teq/… Read full post »

Female Lawmakers Warned About Skirt Lengths and Necklines:  Male Republican lawmakers in the Montana House of Representatives have enacted a controversial new dress code for women that cautions female lawmakers to watch skirt lengths and necklines.  Makes you wonder, do these guys not get F/… Read full post »

Russian Scientist Says Mountain-Sized Asteroid Heading Our Way:  A Russian astrophysicist says his team has located a huge, mountain-sized asteroid known as 2014 UR116, whose orbit crosses the Earth's every three years, that possibly could collide with Earth during its three-year orbital cycle.&/… Read full post »


NYC to Replace Aging Phone Booths With WiFi Pillars:  New York City plans to replace its aging phone booths with futuristic new WiFi pillars starting in 2015.  Its kind of comforting to know that as a modern society, we’re never more than a block or two away from high-speed acc/… Read full post »

Maldives Desalination Plant Fire Causes Water Crisis:  Authorities declared a "disaster situation" in the Maldives after a fire in a desalination plant led to severe water shortages, triggering unrest on the streets of the “honeymoon islands” capital.  All I can say is I’m/… Read full post »

DECEMBER 4, 2014 9:03PM

Giant Jurassic Fleas Found in China

Giant Jurassic Fleas Found in China:  Newly found fossils of fleas 165 million years old, show that the critters were almost an inch in length and had blood-sucking mouthpieces that scientists say were used to penetrate extremely tough hides.  That’s just crazy!  How the hell are/… Read full post »


Native Americans Came to New World in Three Waves:  A recently released gene study suggests that Native Americans probably migrated into the new World in three waves from Siberia, beginning more than 15,000 years ago.  Wow!  All I can say is there must have been some really grea/… Read full post »

College Student Found Dead in Her Work Dumbwaiter:  Authorities say they’ve found no evidence of foul play after finding a 21-year-old college student was found dead in a dumbwaiter at the bar and grill where she worked in a small western Wisconsin town.  No evidence of foul play?&nbs/… Read full post »

Study Examines How Often We Change Sheets:  A new study interviewed thousands and concluded that the majority of Americans change their bed sheets on average about once a week.  When questioned about the study’s accuracy, researchers described it “change you can believe in.&rdqu/… Read full post »

Malibu Gym 


New Malibu Gym Owner’s Policies Stir Controversy:  The new owner of Diamond’s Malibu Gym has been stirring up quite a bit of controversy with some of his new gym policies.  Many feel that it all began with Diamond’s habit of putting ice cubes in the ur/… Read full post »

NOVEMBER 29, 2014 11:27PM

Stone Age Flint Axe Found Intact

Stone Age Flint Axe Found Intact:  Archaeologists have unearthed an incredibly rare, 5500 -year-old Stone Age flint axe on the island of Lolland in Denmark, buried a few feet into the Earth with its wooden handle still attached.  Scientists say this is one of the earliest examples of someon/… Read full post »

Oregon Police Dog Fired for Poor Performance:  A 2-year-old Belgian Malinois was supposed to become the ninth member of the police force in the Oregon coastal town of Cannon Beach, but police felt the poor dog just didn't have what it takes and was “fired.”  Guess now he'll have/… Read full post »

Man Charged With Felony After Pointing Banana at Cops:  A Colorado man is facing charges of felony menacing after police say he pointed a banana at officers, causing them to believe they were in "imminent danger" from "a deadly weapon.”  Civil libertarians say incidents like this shou/… Read full post »

NOVEMBER 27, 2014 12:06AM

Inventor of the Teleprompter Dies

Inventor of the Teleprompter Dies:  Hurbert Scholarly, the inventor of the teleprompter, has died at age 91.  Distraught family members say they are having difficulty finding the words to express their grief.



Man Gets Prison forRead full post »

Double Arm Transplant Recipient Thanks Doctors:  A 40-year-old quadruple amputee thanked the Boston surgeons who performed a rare, dual arm transplant on him last month, describing the experience of getting the new limbs as simply surreal.  Wonderful news!  Now, let’s give those/… Read full post »

Floating Islands Could Save the Sinking Maldives:  With rising seas threatening and situated just 5 feet above sea level, the Maldivian government has teamed up with a Dutch architectural firm to create floating islands that could hopefully save the sinking Maldives nation.  And, in keeping/… Read full post »

Bill Cosby Requested Female Letterman Staffers Watch Him Eat Curry:  Its being reported that Bill Cosby insisted that female staffers of the Letterman show all had to gather around in the green room, sit down and watch him while he ate curry.  Oh for heaven’s sake, as if Ann Curry has/… Read full post »

Hollywood Mother Claims Young Daughter Attacked by Coyotes:  A Hollywood mother is claiming that her 4-Year-Old Daughter was attacked by coyote just outside her Hollywood Hills home.  Local wildlife officials say the animal most likely came down from the hills to audition for a part in the/… Read full post »