IT'S OFFICIAL;

I can see again!   And it is startlingly fantastic!

I thought I knew how blind I was.  After all, everything I looked at was a blur.  I had even given to carrying a magnifying glass so that I could read.  I had to use it to settle/… Read full post »

In December of 2007, I had cataract surgery on my left eye.  Two weeks later … in January of 2008, I had the right eye done.   The benefits were remarkable!   For the first time in a decade, I could see clearly without glasses – except to read, where a still need/… Read full post »

JUNK MAIL FOR THE BORED AND BORING: 

BREAKING NEWS!!!!!  McCain Endorses Obama Healthcare 

In a move that shocked even himself, this morning Senator John McCain endorsed President Barack Obama’s healthcare plan, even to include a fully funded Government Option.  He then woke… Read full post »

IN HONOR OF LITTLEWILLIE'S FRIEND, TIMMY 

And ode to Timmy Stump (to the tune of Surf City)

Where the water is warm

And the fish are swimm’n

You can find him there

Hang’n with the… Read full post »

THE FINAL CHAPTER 

Ever since I entered politics, I’ve had an unlisted number.  In those days, it was prudent.  However, I continued that way in the years that followed … 1982 to 1994, and even to this day.  Therefore, I was truly surprised when my phone rang o/… Read full post »

CAUTION:  X-RATED MATERIAL AHEAD

I am not writing about healthcare today.  Nor am I writing about any of my previous wives.  In fact, I don’t even want to write this prologue, but must …

… because the material that lies ahead is not for eyes that might f… Read full post »

It was a time to celebrate.  The CAT results said all the tumors were “dead” … 27 of them in all.  For over 20 weeks, we had lived with the possibility that the chemo would fail; twenty weeks of putting on your best face, making up stuff to laugh at, trying/… Read full post »

A Follow-up to "THEY CALLED HER KAREN"

It is overwhelming to meet someone, and to know almost instantly that this is the person for you; the one you want to spend the rest of your life with; the one person you can not live without.  If you haven’t experienced it, I’m not… Read full post »

Originally written as (UNCLE ROD’S RULES FOR BACHELORHOOD)     © Rod Emmons, 2007

The other day I received an e-mail from an acquaintance that said, “Uncle Rod, for a man your age, you seem to have managed this bachelorhood thing pretty well. You live well, you s… Read full post »

Today's Headline Stories: 

Endangered gorillas join Facebook, MySpace

African wildlife agency taps social networking sites to help save species.  Individual gorilla listings to occur.

In an effort to save gorillas, an African wildlife agency is assisting individual gorillas in establishin… Read full post »

Cattle Call 

Wasted flesh around the altar

Hoping that their dreams won’t falter,

Waiting for the nightly slaughter

… With a half-filled glass.

Fluffy plumage, puffed out chests,

Suggestive language to invest

Each proclaiming they’re the best

… At making dreams… Read full post »

Today, I turned over a new leaf.  I knew it was new because it was a fairly small leaf, as all new ones tend to be, and bright yellow/green.  Old leaves tend to be larger and dark green or colorful in their red and orange prior to turning *dead*.  Mine was… Read full post »

Dear Spud:

Regarding your first post, thanks for asking my opinion.  I’ve given it considerable thought overnight, yet still not certain how to answer. But I will try, long winded as it may be.

Your words to me (edited) were:  Rod - … If the politic is something you can… Read full post »

  Read full post »

But her real name was “Love.”

Finally, I can post a picture.  It took me all frigg'n day to figure it out ... and help from Cartouche.  Thanks Cart.  Karen & I ... 1984. 

In the few short months I’ve been hanging around Open Salon, I’… Read full post »

Originally written two years ago, revised for the current moment

I’m getting soft … and shorter, too.  I used to be tall and thin … six-one and one-seventy … but time and gravity have lessened my height.  An abundance of food, along with a woeful lack of exercise,… Read full post »

I know it’s not Tuesday, but …

This is too good to wait. 

So in the spirit of Haiku Thursday,

“Gaucho Steak” 

Eat

This

Now! 

It is what I ate last night; what I’ve eaten several times before, and what I will eat again tonight.  It is called “… Read full post »

It’s football season:And McGuire is calling us out! 

This is my response (see you in two, McG … Go Gators!!!!)

My uncle Harry makes some kick-ass chili.  And he is dedicated to it being real chili, not that pretend stuff you might get in a can ... or think chili… Read full post »

It is true that the ugly head of bigotry has been awakened.   It is evident by some of the recently reported comments regarding President Obama and his concept for health care.  It is also true that the head of bigotry is being well fed with its favorite food ... hatred.  … Read full post »

My Doc’s Cane is Xylocaine:

·         The doctor said, “What’s this?” When he saw my note.  I explained it was his instructions.  He chuckled, briefly.  I’m glad he found it funny. 

·  &n… Read full post »

TOMORROW MORNING…

… when they roll me into the operating room, the following note will be tape to my chest: 

THIS SIDE UP 

HANDLE WITH CARE 

OPEN CAREFULLY 

CLOSE ACCORDING TO DIRECTIONS 

DO NOT DESTROY CONTAINER 

RETURN TO MANUFACTURER IN ORIGINAL CONDITI… Read full post »

PINNING THE TAIL ON THE JACKASS ....

I am finally scheduled for surgery again … next Tuesday, the 8th. After the previous false start, and the subsequent tests that followed, I am anxious to get this show on the road.

For the uninitiated, this is back surgery … L4 -… Read full post »

Saturday, I had my usual lunch with my black friend, Sol.   I say “black,” but Sol hasn’t always been black.  In the beginning … during his childhood, … he was “colored” which quite honestly worked out well for him because it allowed him to b/… Read full post »

Testing, 1-2, Testing 1-2

So Friday, I had my stress test.  I got a “B.  Just glad Cindy Ross wasn’t grading (just kidding, Cindy; I just felt compelled to mention your name).

Stress tests are stressful: I mean BEFORE you take the damn things.   

This one was for me; I… Read full post »

WILL CONTESTANT THREE IDENTIFY YOURSELF?

I have a profile on a dating site.  I don’t go there much anymore, and even when I do I never contact anyone.  The few I have met via it are rarely what I am expecting after reading their profile, and I wind up wasting an… Read full post »