Rod Emmons

Rod Emmons
Location
Cape Coral, Florida, United States
Birthday
June 01
Bio
MY OPEN SALON BIO (‘Cause someone said I needed one) BLOG: Oh how I hate that word. The idea is great, but the word, itself, sounds so ... so icky. It's a name for something caught in your throat or something stuck to the bottom of your shoes ... something someone did that smells ... not a name for a journal or diary or random editorializing. Whose word is that, anyway? Smells awfully yuppie to me. Yet here I am, stuck in computor-ese, once more dancing to someone else’s drum … Blogging. Oh well, maybe I can get past that. 'Cause while I’m here, I’d occasionally like to do a little soul searching, sometimes think out loud, let others hear, and see what kind of s--t that stirs up. My life’s path has wandered into sales, management, banking, appraising, real estate, construction, design … yes, even politics … and a host of other activities that together, I think have opened my eyes, and hopefully, my mind. So you’ll get a dose of me from several perspectives, some a little tame, others fairly jaded, all a little philosophical. I can’t help it; it’s an itch that needs to be scratched, and now the pus is about to spill onto this site. Anyway, I tend to be irreverent, sarcastic and glib, and there's a good chance I’ll say something that will piss you off. In that event, just click the red "X" in the upper right corner, I’ll disappear and you'll be safe after that. But if you’re willing to take a risk, and aren’t afraid of skinning your knees, come on in. You might have some fun and there’s a first-aid kit close by. Just remember: proceed with caution, avoid the puddles, and always … ALWAYS! … wear rubbers (on your shoes).

Rod Emmons's Links

Salon.com
OCTOBER 30, 2009 8:07AM

Surf'n with the Stump

Rate: 6 Flag

IN HONOR OF LITTLEWILLIE'S FRIEND, TIMMY 

And ode to Timmy Stump (to the tune of Surf City)

 

Where the water is warm

And the fish are swimm’n

            Stump Timmy, he’s the one

You can find him there

Hang’n with the women

            Stump Timmy, He’s the one

He can’t hang ten

Or Even five.

Some say he’s lucky

Just to be alive,

But put him on that board

And watch him drive.

Yeah!

           Stump Timmy, he’s the one. 

Well, he’s not real tall.That’s for certain

              Stump Timmy, he’s the one.

And he has to look up

When he’s do’n some flirt’n

            Stump Timmy, he’s the one

Yeah, he may be short

And he sure ain’t fast

But when it comes to surf’

He’ll kick your ass

Just watch him move,

When he passes gas.

            Stump Timmy, he’s the one. 

 

(Backup Singers) (Background and fade) (Lead - talk over)

 Stump Timmy, he’s the one.

Come on ladies, join the team

Stump Timmy, he’s the one.

He’s your kinda guy, if you know what I mean

Stump Timmy, he’s the one.

No he won’t try to feel ya or chase you around.

But he’s got a tongue, and he likes to go down.

            Stump Timmy, he’s the one.

Yeah! Stump Timmy!

Stump Timmy, he’s lotsa fun!.

He can’t outrun you, but he still can lick ya.

Yeah!

Stump Timmy! (he loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah)

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Comments

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Because Timmy (Stump) Thomas deserves a song!
Too bad Brian Wilson is still a psychotic mess, because this cries out for Beach Boys harmony. Rated
Jeanette DeMain and I could not agree whether a song about Timmy the Surfing Stump should be an instrumental or a song with vocals. Thanks for settling that argument with "Stump City". It's poignant and profoundly emotive.

RATED
Between littlewille's original story, which caused me to bust a stitch in my nose from snorting coffee through it, and your son lyrics, I believe a legend has been well and truly born...World, I give you: STUMP TIMMY!

Rated for very creative chuckles.
Jeff ... you are right! Brian Wilson! But it might just be his psychotic mess that makes this a true hit! As Billy Joel said, "You may be right. I may be crazy. But it just may be a lunatic you're looking for."

Littlewillie ... Stump was crying out for lyrics. And I see the movie in my mind's eye ... Intros with great surfer music, lots of surfers pipelining their way to shore, and right among them, The Stump! Strapped to his board ... smiling like crazy ... hanging none! Letting the waves guide his way!

Jennette ... Stump's story cried for lyrics. Legends need lyrics! Plus, considering his condition, he can only sing ... his guitar days being in his past.

Torman ... thanks, man, and now you've opened up a whole 'nother can of worms ... STUMP TIMMY! which may not only be a cool Mantra and/or tee shirt, but also a quiz show ... wherein Timmy answers even the hardest of our questions. Littlewillie, if you read this, you may wnat to expand Timmy's horizons in that direction ... at least such as they are from his vantage point.
Funny, Rod. If Timmy needs a wetsuit, I've got the scissors.
R
JB ... I'm still laughing at your comment. Perfect!
Nice . . . very nice!
"Stump Timmy The Quiz Show" sounds like a great idea, Rod. I'll leave it to John Blumenthal to make the pitch to Hollywood.
Only you Rod... I'm over here laughing my arse off.