Please bare with my grammer I wish I would touk an intrest back in school .I had bass and drum lines running through my head it's no excuse and I regret it but I'm sick of it.I've been down about it but fuck it what can I do, I'm trying

1. Undercover narcs they hire out at K mart or Wall Mart.

you know who I'm talking about there usually teenagers probably honor roll students that now think there Kojak.  For some reason they always seem to follow me like a flies on shit . I love it when I spot them, and I always do, maybe it's because there so dam obvious. Once I see them I usually like to take them on a wild goose chase through the store. I'll pick up a screwdriver then casually move on to women's lingerie then move on to sporting goods just to get em thinking. Sometimes I'll play hide and seek with them, I'll spot them doing there best Colombo routine then move real fast into another isle then double back behind them and go boo. J.k . Sometimes I'll act like a psycho and constantly make creepy eye contact with them. I did this one time and must of scared the shit out this chick, the poor girl walked to the other side of the store.

I felt kind of bad .

2. Young people that work in the corporate world that take there job to seriously:

Like these kids that work at Verizion or a Best Buy that have the company mind fuck line all memorized and in a N.Y.minute  ready to defend the reputation of there monolithic company values to the death.

There like talking automatons. 

It's like me  "Ya I think you guys over charged me on my last bill" 

"Oh ok sorry sir well check that out right away we like to do everything we can at Verizion to please our customers."

" Once they start to use the company name in a sentence it's over, case closed they've passed the point of no return. Granted they'll probably be allot richer then me at my age but Jimminy crickets man wheres your soul . I feel like telling them wake up tool this company just assume piss on you let alone care about you, come on go head steal something knock something over and loosen up man. And by the way the dildo that's sticking out of your ass you might want to remove it, not good for the companies appearance. 

3 Whether men and the news people who for some reason think there responsible for the whether:

you here these guys and gals all the time"

What happened Larry, The weekend was a" was out"

Whether man "Sorry Jane about the weekend I'll try harder this week."

Who are you god ? 

did I accidentally pop into a rerun of "I Dream of Genie". Why don't you try just getting the fucking wheather report right for a change that's all we ask, and by the way if you can control the whether how about world peace or starvation and more than that how bout sending me a million dollars Mr. Merlin whether man.

4. Automated answering 

Every-time I have to painstakingly endure one these I find myself cursing at them like the most vile profane creature on the face of the earth. These days there making them smarter  where they actually ask and answer questions to. The conversation usually goes something like this.

Auto answer. "High all of are associates are busy helping other customers write now."

Me . "ohhhgg"

Auto A.  " But why don't you try letting me help you."

Me.  "You can help me buy bending over "

Auto A.  " lets start off buy giving me your name.

Me . " Magilla Gorilla"

Auto A. "I'm sorry can you say that again, try to speak as clearly as you can

Me." Princess laya"

Lets try that again

 Me. "Ron"

Auto A . " Ron, ok Ron, If Ron is your name please press 1.

 Me . "Blow me"

Auto A. " I didn't get that

Me "Get what gonorrhea?"

Auto A ."let's try it one more time. If Ron is you name please press 1."

Me. " I press one" beep"

Auto A.  "Ok Ron( now it's calling me buy name) Ok Ron please dial the first 4 digits of your social security number then press the pound key when your done

Me.  "OOOOWW!!  beep, beep, beep, beep.

Auto A. "I'm sorry can you try that again please.

 Me. "OH MY GOD!!!!!- beep beep beep Beep

 Auto A. We seem to having some difficulties lets try that again press the first 4 digits of your

Me. "Oh you bitch you suck this company sucks why I'm I talking to a fucking machine you slut robot , where did I go wrong in my life,what did I do to deserve this bull shit you piece of shit machine!

A real person answers

"High can I help you sir"

Me. "Yes Mam"

5. People who swipe my cash with those yellow pens

Does it really matter at this point, in theory isn't it all fake anyway. It's really just a peace of paper thats not worth  shit, it's not backed by gold or anything. I might as well give you a piece of  paper with Snoopy on it, it would be worth about the same, and why are you so worried if my money is fake  don't you have better things to do like bag my groceries. I got an Idea, How bout you take that pen and draw a big penis rammed up my ass on my cash that way you can give the money masters a proper representation of what's really going on here.

6. E harmony commercials: 

Every time this commercial comes on all it manages to do is to remind me how bankrupt my love life has been  let's see for...  I don't even want to hear the numbers of years myself.  Im glad these people have found the loves of there life's in this faceless un personal un magical  Plasticized manner but... a... get off my screen. I don't even like the song.. especially that one couple How much are you getting paid to whore out this company again?

My x girlfriend met her current husband on E harmony, there about to get divorced .I bet you won't here that one being played up on a commercial.

"We met on e harmony everything was great until I found out he was a complete Moron ,He didn't Bathe and ate like a gremlin," Thanks E Harmony".

"We met on E harmony she was like my other half and complimented everything I did only problem was she liked shitting in public, I mean everywhere! The Mall, in church, I had to break it off "Thanks E Harmony".

I can't stand the chick on the horse " I'm just a goof, waiting for my ball. " How about letting me put my balls in your mouth lady.  Oh that's bad, I'm so bad, funny thing is I'm really nothing like this I'm really shy and respectful with women I just like to write this way if you want to read a funny story just how pathetically shy I could be with women go to  It's about a winter crush I had recently it's called "My winter crush" I know for a fact no one is reading anything over there, any way where was I ,oh ya my balls in your mouth, I guess the bottom line is I don't like these commercials.

7..Rock bands who whore there songs out to corporate commercials:

  I know this started awhile ago,  But I always cringe inside when I see it . When I herd the Who do it it killed me than Rush but at least they where older and payed some dues, know it like let' s rock out and sell meaningless shit, Rock and Roll man. I just saw one that has David Bowies song Jean Jeanie of course selling jeans.  Wow what a brain storm. I would love to hear the conversation that these  advertising Einstein's had coming up with this one. "Wow I got it ! "Jean Jeanie", lets call David Bowie offer him a 7 trillion dollars for two verses its in our budget it would be great" Jean Jeanie" and people will think jeans  I got to buy jeans", god Roy that's brilliant , Thanks Sue . I don't have to much more to say I'm being lazy  except I hate it

 8.Those stupid see whose on line videos on Myspace.

I know Myspace has kind of become the Jerry Springer of online social networking sights but I still have mine for my music and every-time I log on there they are, these semi retarded people making Quasimoto like faces into the camera. There always these semi hot chicks and pretty boy dudes to. Just once I would like to log on to Myspace and see Leon Spinks on there or Mike Tyson or how about some real old winos, that would be cool, they could like fall over in front of the camera then suddenly appear or Charles Manson that would be a shocker , or how about bout getting real by giving us an accurate representation of who's really trolling Myspace like put a  45 year old over weight psycho dressed as a women jerking off in front of a screen ,now that would be some cool promotion. 

9. Wishing wells 

I've never had one wish come true after throwing a coin into a wishing well I've tried every teknique there is, over the shoulder , under my balls, off my forehead .I've even tried dimes and quarters like that's going to matter Like the wish fairy is going to take my wish more seriously with a quarter thrown into it . I don't now maybe that's true Prayers seem to be answered quicker when you give Pat Robertson more money,anyway Enough of of that shit.  I'm figurine this Wish Fairy owes me at least five dollars at this point and with interest rates the way they are I'm thinking it's more like eight or nine I want my compensation! I've become really disillusioned with the hole ritual . Maybe if I throw a pineapple bomb in there next time it will work better for me  .

 10. People that are so surprised Obama isn't the Hope child of Mt. Zion:

News flash Duu I saw this guy doing the tool dance frankly as soon as he entered the race. The fact that people are so surprised at this really makes me question the judgment of the American public. Bottom line The only time there will be any real change in this country is when there is a viable third party by the people as check and balance to the two party system. Don't waste your time voting in these elections cause there rigged they've always been and will continue to be until this happens. I see people  arguing in these left wing right wing paradimes, come on man they given us the arguments and they given us the beliefs all they have to do is sit back and watch the carnival go buy while they make off with all the lute, divide and conquer it's rigged to stay exactly the same, "change" man where have I heard that one before let's see by every presidential candidate that has run for the last 40 years. The fact that he was using this term made me laugh . This political jargon bores me at least the way it's presented. I used to walk around all angry,No more I won't give them my energy any more I much rather write goofy shit it's easier on my colon.

I'll end this with the old saying "money talks bullshit walks" and right now the American people are speed walking into oblivion