Rose Weagant

Life in the Methow Valley

Din Mutha

Din Mutha
Location
Methow Valley, Washington, US
Birthday
December 31
Title
Rose Weagant
Company
Feral House
Bio
Rose Weagant relocated from the Gulf Coast to the little town of Twisp, WA, in 2011 and has since written about her adventures in the wonderful and strange Methow Valley. Rose has been published in Hip Mama Magazine, Gonzo Parenting and the Methow Valley News. She lives with her daughter, son, three-legged dog, and two cats in what is affectionately known as Feral House.

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Salon.com
AUGUST 6, 2009 11:05PM

Feminine products and the 7 year old

Rate: 5 Flag

Hulooo! I'm back! I have emerged from the pull and wrench of theatre costuming and the rigors of an amazing yet all too entirely stressful trip up to Washington. Whew! I must admit I have been drained. In preparation for the trip, I had started to wonder what I was going to write about next (now that I have hands that aren't fighting gold lamee and stuffed fish). Before getting on the plane, I knew what I was going to do; Toddler's in Transit. But I think I should save that for later, because at every moment, Magnolia was dropping her gems of genius into my ears. Even before we left the confines of our own city, she was giving me gold.

Before our long flight up, we had to stop at Walgreen's for some traveling items.(Note: If your children are really driving you crazy and whining on a plane, internally rationalize that they are just having a stomach ache from the motion and give them half a dose of children's Dramamine. You will have a quiet trip thereafter.)When I returned back to the car filled with my children, doting husband and the kitchen sink neatly folded in with everything else in matching cheap luggage, my daughter asked, "Did you get tampons?"
"Magnolia!" My husband yelped, horrified by feminine chatter from his pre-pubescent girl.
"What,Dad? It's a natural thing! Ya' know, for women and their, ya' know, Egyptian things." She defended.
"What are women's Egyptian things?" I asked.
"Ya' know. Their pyramids"

I would like to think that had she been born twenty or so years earlier, she would have been a favorite of Bill Cosby's on "Children Say the Darndest Things" but she might not have made it past the censors back then. Might I say she is a little too controversial and "on the edge"?

Last year at a restaurant a man asked Magnolia what she was going to be for Halloween. She nonchalantly replied,"I'm going to be Typhoid Mary! OOOoooooohh. I'm a carrier of communicable disease! Oooooohh! Have you washed your hands lately?"
And sure enough, that is exactly what she was. While other children were dressed in their $49.99 WalMart special Hannah Montana or Angel costumes, mine was rocking a totally homemade getup from bits and pieces of our toy room. She was is and will always be original, no matter what.

I'd like to think that her originality is of my doing, but I could never in a million years think of the wacky things that come out of her mouth. And though this might appear to be just a venue to show off how awesome my kids are, I'm going to do it with vigor and zest for the moment.

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Comments

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You've got to love that originality. In some ways, what more could one ask for, right?
Thanks, Owl. Those crazy kids. They keep us laughing everyday.
Bwahahaha! Where is Magnolia getting all of her material from?! Seems pretty advanced for a seven year old. Pyramids. Hehehehe!
I'm going to think about this next time I'm on my pyramid. I won't be in denial, no sirrreee....