I don’t know how I met her, spose we didn’t ‘meet’ in the typical sense.   She just seemed to be there next to me at the big table with a bunch of other fast friends in a bar neither one of us should have been in.  The drinking age was lowered to 18, for beer at least, a few years earlier but we weren't close to even that, she said she was 15, I had no reason not to believe her.  I thought the band was Marshal Tucker but I realized later they were just playing Marshal Tucker covers or maybe only a couple.  Hell maybe it was Outlaws covers for all I know!  But one guy did have a flute and everything.  

  When I woke up it was just starting to get hot.  Someone was making bacon, I ate it, it was greasy, way greasy and kinda under cooked.  But whatever, I ate what came my way those days and wasn’t too picky.  Same as in my choice of associates, places to sleep and girls.  Not picky but painfully shy and given the circumstances I usually found myself in, the bashfulness was almost debilitating.  But there I was drinking in a bar with a hot girl, evidently very into me.  I attached myself to her or vice versa.  As it turned out she was a runaway and staying at a ladies place, an older lady, 30 something I spose. 

  I was told it was a home of sorts for wayward girls, there appeared to be several staying there but it became evident as I got to know her and that woman a little that it was really some sort of whore training program.  I think the lady was a wanna be Sally Stanford of Virginia Beach or something but really just a piece of crap, whoring out relatively naive little girls for profit and who knows what other motivations.  It was kinda scary and she obviously didn’t like me messing with the merchandise.  On the other hand at the bar she was kinda encouraging it, I guess maybe trying to practice her up for the paying gigs or whatever.  What she didn’t like was me following them home and then taking off with her on our own that night, but though she was discouraging she didn’t try to stop her from leaving or anything, it wasn’t that coercive. 

  I don’t remember the girl’s name I guess I’m embarrassed to say anyways she told me she took off to really experience some things in life before dying.   She said she had cancer and only a year to live.  Taking off under that circumstance made perfect sense to me then.  Now of course first thing I think is “her poor parents”, but whatever, who knows if that was even true, I used to come up with some fun stories myself when I was traveling as a teen, ya gotta have some story, why not make it a good one ;-).  

  I told her I was heading south on a vagabonding adventure and she should come with me.  She agreed and we headed back to the ‘house’ to get her stuff.  It was too difficult for her to try and get out that night, so I left and told her I’d be back  to get her in the morning.  I spent the night under that house, a few crawlies but mostly just dry leaves, wasn't bad.  She was eager to go, up and ready when I got to the door, it seemed like early, well before noon I guess.  She didn’t have much, a small kinda hippie cotton bag and an oversized suede leather purse with fringes of course, she reeked of patchouli.  I can’t recall what we did most of that day, it was dreamy. 

  We did get in some swimming in the afternoon under a humid sky that was turning grey; I remember wishing the waves would pull down her swim suit top.  Later that night back at the camp as we were hanging out with the other kids talking and smoking dope I couldn’t wait till it was time to go to bed and to get into the only place the two of us had to sleep, my sleeping bag.   It was anticlimactic for me and downright disappointing I’m sure for her.  My damn bashfulness, this wouldn’t be the first time and by far not the last that it prevented me from getting laid.  I should say me and my potential partner, looking back now she probably wondered what the hell was wrong with me.  We crawled into my bag together - it was a tight fit though both of us were slight people.  I had had sex before though not much, but this must have been the first time I slept with a girl all night.  Though there was a lot of grinding and making out and feeling out and such like that, there was no sex, I know she wanted to but I couldn’t commit.  That’s why what happened later seems pretty logical looking back on it; she had to be horny as hell and despite women’s lib and all that, she needed a guy to be a little more assertive.  

  After a fitful night of unrequited heavy petting we woke to a light sprinkle and I made the spontaneous decision that since we had to pack up anyway to protect our stuff from the rain we may as well split, head south and hit the next spot, wherever that would be.  So we did and trucked out to the main southbound route.  By now it was raining pretty steady and we were getting pretty wet.  Once there, after hitching a while, a couple of guys maybe like in thier early 20s or so stopped, but not heading south.  They had turned around and offered to pick us up, just to get out of the rain they said and we could hang out at their apartment till it stopped.  I didn’t like that idea at all but she wanted to go with them and was willing to go even if I didn’t.  Bad sign there, this girl who in my mind was becoming my girlfriend, was ready to take off with these two with or without me.  Motivation enough to jump in so away we went.  

  It was the Sunshine Apartments, and once there it didn’t take long after smoking the obligatory joint and discussing the wisdom in Abby Hofmann’s, “Steal This Book”, for them to get her off to a bed room to ‘dry off’.  Once I realized I was alone in the front room, what was I supposed to do?  Just go barging in?  Was it really my business?  Well whatever, of course I did go barging in, what if she was getting raped or something, right?  When I came in she was laying back on the bed with her top off and her jeans down to her ankles, they were all over her, one making out with her and playing with her perky little tittles and one kissing her belly and working his way down to her panty line, clearly without resistance and with active appreciative encouragement.  At least she wasn’t getting raped.  At that moment I was crushed.  I mean sure, she said she was dying and wanted ‘it all’, more than likely had professional experience and had been left hot and horny without relief the night before so it made perfect sense, she was ripe and ready.     But still, damn, ouch. 

   I slammed the door and broke out weeping.  I was sobbing in the front room and she was getting pounded in the back, all my patchouli peace love fantasies were dashed.  I couldn’t see straight for the tears.  One of the guys came out to console me, how sweet.  He said he was sorry, they didn’t know I would be so bummed but that I could come join in too if I wanted!  OMG- no I wasn’t ready for that, damn this free love shit was already blowing my mind.  It was getting dark.  He went back in and I started getting my stuff together.  I was pissed, feeling a little vindictive.  I slashed at a window screen with my pocketknife and finally pushed it out onto the black, wet grass.  I stuck the Abby Hoffman book in my backpack and hit the wind.  I was on my own again.  That was quick. 

   That’s how I ended up back on the boardwalk in the rain under my space blanket when the kids I had met that first day came by.  They told me they were heading over to some hotel where one guy had gotten a room and I could come with them, everyone was crashing there.  Cool huh?  It was the 70s, the feeling was waning but there was still a little of that peace love and understanding vibe left.

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