I don't get this stuff like Suzy did. I am not an internet mavin like she was. I could never figure out why the hell she spent so much time here, either.

I do now.  The warmth and concern that you, a bunch of people who don't really know us, is truely awe inspiring.

Tonight before bed, the three of us sat with Suzy's little laptop and read through the posts and comments. Tina said, "These people really loved mommy, didn't they".

Thank you for that and thank you for making two little girls and one big girl feel a little bit better.

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I feel like an idiot typing this but I've got to do something. The girls are in bed and sound asleep. None of us has slept well this week and the poor dears are worn out.

As for me I don't want to sleep. I dream when I sleep and I can't face my dreams alone.

I did sleep for an hour or so this afternoon, when I finally tried to accomplish something and decided to do laundry. I got as far as Suzy's pillow. It still smells of her. I pressed it against my face and just breathed in. I woke with two little girls mixing their tears with mine. I can't express myself well in writing. I don't know why the hell she asked me to do this in the first place, but I'm doing it because she wanted me to.