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Safe_Bet's Amy

Safe_Bet's Amy
In my own little hell, Alaska,
June 06
Missing her while trying to be as good a mom as she was.

Editor’s Pick
SEPTEMBER 24, 2010 3:46PM

NEWS FLASH: Cause of Homosexuality Discovered

Rate: 80 Flag

People's homophobia some times is just so freak'in stupid that you HAVE to laugh.  Here's a perfect example:

The "Just Cookies" Bakery,  in Indianapolis, Indiana, has refused to make multicolored cupcakes to celebrate "National Coming Out Day".

Their reasoning for refusing to make the cupcakes was,

  "we're a family-run business, we have two young, impressionable daughters and we thought maybe it was best not to do that" .


SO, this professional baker, after what is obviously a great deal of research, has determined that the cause of "gayness" is those freak'in rainbow cupcakes! 

He apparently has determined that if his daughters even SEE a rainbow cupcake they will immediately lace on a pair of Doc Martens and will go shopping for flannel shirts with their new dyke girlfriends.

BTW,  my favorite comment that I've read was a person who asked,

"I ate half  of a rainbow cupcake once, does that make me Bi?"


P.S.  I'd also warn everyone to look out for people that eat one color of cupcake and then later comes back and eats another color of cupcake.  They are obviously still in the closet.



Images courtesy of:

Read more about the evil gay cupcakes HERE

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wow. yeah, i have to laugh at that. my ex-inlaws were convinced it was my liberal education that "made" me gay. my guess is they would be on this bandwagon...
The ignorance of the general public never ceases to astonish me. Which is why those of us who know better must do all we can to spread the light.
The dude is right! Just by looking at them, I lost control and involuntarily pitched a college boy's ass in the coffee shop. I was really confused when he smiled. Take down that obscene porn, immediately! Shit, what's next, Liberace music?
That's just plain frickin' funny . . .
I mean, sad, but funny . . . you know what I mean.
Is it possible that this would explain why the FDA banned Red Food Dye No. 2?

And I wonder if said baker ever baked a cake using 3 colors on the 4th of July????? Did he wonder if his precious children might have gotten confused?
Good Lord amy.. Did they ask the same questions when they bought the Rainbow Brite dolls?
It just amazes me.
Rated with hugs
So, I guess they don't bake marble cakes either because that blends chocolate and white cake mixes. God forbid we should have interracial bundt cakes! Stupidity reigns in this world.
I knew it! That would explain the group domination that occurred last time I made black & blue cupcakes!
they may not cause homosexuality, but they could cause blindness... and isn't coming out the first step to reducing that other activity alleged to cause blindness?
heh, heh. I think I will make me some swirly chocolate and vanilla cupcakes, that will freak everyone out.....bahahahah.
Heh heh. All kidding aside, this is beyond stupid. When did homosexuality become anathema? It used to be an accepted, even an embraced, practice. What the heck gives?

Those cupcakes would throw me into a diabetic coma, but hey, I don't have to eat them ;-) R
I needed a good laugh. Nothing like the ignorant who play stand-up comics.
I thought the cause of Homosexuality was attraction to people of the same sex. Cupcakes, who knew? Has anyone looked into the effects of individual fruit pies?
Brings new meaning to the old tune, "Indiana wants me ... Lord I can't go back there ..."

Try a Poi cupcake sometime ... they look like red velvet but are actually good for you. Seems to work for us as Polynesian societies have always included our gay sisters and brothers ... only exception are the poor Samoans who sold out to the Mormons ... and even they "hop a freight" when no one from Church is around ...
Thanks for the laugh. Who knew? Next thing they'll be banning cupcakes in school lunches.
Uh-oh. I just saw a My Little Pony with a rainboy mane and tail. You know what that means...

You know, I used to think I'd seen all the farkwittage the world had to offer. But each day seems to bring a new ah-crap-you're-kidding-me surprise. Sheesh.
Idiots. I did eat a chocolate cupcake and then married my husband though. ~r
This is great...a perfect illustration of the issue. That picture alone brightened my day, quite literally.

Rated with rainbows.
Now I wanna make those fucking cupcakes! Dammit!
Grumble grumble...teh gehs have ruint rainbows. Damn geyhs.

I'm so fucking tired of stupid.
Stupidity knows no boundaries! R
why are you upset? coloring additives are unhealthy, you should eat your muffins as god intended them to be. with maybe a bit of chocolate sauce. or vanilla icing. but red and green ain't natural, and probably shows sympathy with hugo chavez anyway.
Cupcakes!... I am still mad about my pie recipe. It was the bomb. And your food handlers don't have a clue.
i knew that all along ... ... ... r.
They have rainbow cupcakes? hmmmm I had no idea. My sister is gay and I'm not. My cousin is gay and I'm not. Where in the hell did they get those damn cupcakes? I'm calling them right now!
I've been queer for Little Debbie since I was 5. Who knew?
Worse than the idea that the parents were afraid their kids would turn gay is the more realistic idea - that the parents were afraid of looking like they accepted homosexuality. They didn't want to look like it was ok. They want their girls to know that it's NOT okay, in fact. God forbid one of the girls (or their children) turns out to actually be gay.
I reach middle age to find this out? All my life I've been avoiding cream puffs only to learn gayness was caused by cupcakes. Can I safely have a cream puff now, Amy? Are you sure it's OK?
i LOVE cupcakes...chocolate ones, vanilla ones, rainbow ones. does that mean i'm a slut?

i'm kinna ok with that.
congrats on your ep. not all people in indiana are homophobia, those people are idiots. send us all some cupcakes!!!
lemonpulp: Isn't liberal and gay sinomomous???

David Kinne: I agree with spreading the light but I think out baker buddy has a blindfold on!

Dr.Spudman 44: Liberace music? Damn, dude! We're queer not musically challenged!

Owl_Says_Who: **can't keep myself from saying it* Don't you mean it's a Hoot??? ;~)
Amy, this is really, really funny!!! I mean, in a politically deplorable way, of course, but this level of ignorance - wow. You gotta either laugh or cry or kick the cat. Great post - congrats on your EP!
Okay, I stopped eating cupcakes 2 years ago to keep off the weight....are you telling me..??. great , I'd rather be fat.
those are some very pretty cupcakes. How did they do that?
Anyway, I'm always suspicious of people who A) have to explain everything to their kids and B) are afraid cupcakes can turn people gay or straight.

Cakes have been controversial lately. Remember the guy who wanted Happy Birthday Adolph Hitler (or similar) written on a birthday cake for his son? That baker rightly refused. My conclusion is that cake makes people crazy.
Cupcakes? Are people really this stupid? I just don't understand but I had to laugh :)
Yeah, damn cupcakes!!! Evil cupcakes!!! BAD CUPCAKES!! Oooo...nummy nummy cupcakes!!!

...that damned rainbow (cupcake) connection! Geez! Pass a few my way...I think I can handle my cupcakes without going over to the rainbow side. Loved the post...v happy EP!
A co-worker of mine once refused to eat cake with pink frosting flowers at an office birthday party for a male colleague. I see now that pink icing for men is a start on that horrible slippery slope ultimately leading to rainbow cupcakes.
"I ate half of a rainbow cupcake once, does that make me Bi?"
if I eat more than one, does that make me poly?
maybe someone could do a whole post on cupcake variations. eg if you put one on top of the other, is the 1st the dominant one? etc :p
On a completely different note, I made a similar looking cake celebrating Woodstock. Only swirled it so it was more tie-dye looking. And I don't think anyone who ate it became a hippie.
Leave it to OS to take a serious issue, turn it into a joke, and put it on the cover.

Of course the issue has nothing to do with cupcakes turning people into homosexuals. The real issue is the right of someone, based on conscience, to refuse to serve homosexuals or people who are perceived as supporting homosexual causes. The flip side is the right of homosexuals and those supporting their causes not to be denied public accommodations based on their sexual orientation or support of gay and lesbian causes.

Such a post might have generated some interesting discussion. Instead we get "cupcakes make people gay."
Nonsense. Everyone knows the REAl cause of homosexuality is exposure to musical production numbers featuring Dolores Gray seen at an impressionable age.

Had my mother not thoughtlessly taken me to the Roxy back in 1954 to see "Kismet" I might well be the father of ten children today.
Doh! I knew cupcakes were evil!
When I saw this pic on the cover I almost didn't read this, thinking it was yet another post about beets.

Anyway, am I gay now? I don't feel any different, but that in itself could be significant.
Oh daughter is gay...she wears flannel shirts and doc Martens...I've been buying them for her...did I make her gay? I was wondering if it might have been all of those Xena episodes that I made her watch.
"SO, this professional baker, after what is obviously a great deal of research, has determined that the cause of "gayness" is those freak'in rainbow cupcakes"

And here you were thinking it was a tire swing.

This story rings a bell somehow. It seems a very similar and just as completely absurd circumstance happened a few years ago at some other restaurant/food place.

Dammit! I hate it when this happens. I'll be trying to remember what it was all damned night now. I’ll figure it out and let you know (if you don’t already).
I wish my family's explantion was cupcakes. For them it's "not normal" and a lack of God. I'd take baked goods any day.
Hilarious. Thanks for this.
Your as brilliant as these cupcakes are...
Hey, I'm a bisexual! I try to have sex at least twice a year.
Maybe they think their specialty is angel food. It's sad but you've got to laugh. Love the 1/2 cupcake comment too.
So that's why the cute lesbian in my old neighbourhood kept making me cupcakes? Damn, she was a good cook!
It reminds me of an argument against gay marriage which stated that legalization would lead to a drop in population. It's the stupidity, stupid.
OS is a damn fine place :) Thanks for this Amy.
I usually don't agree with mishima, but he's right.

The bakery owners don't think rainbow cupcakes cause gayness. They just don't want to be seen as participating in Gay Pride events, either for their own reasons of conscience or, more likely, for fear of being boycotted by the many, many conservative Hoosiers when word gets out that this bakery is making special cupcakes for National Coming Out Day.

They aren't refusing service to homosexuals; they are refusing to make a specialty cupcake. Big difference there.

Look, I work at a restaurant. We are not a gay establishment, but during PRIDE and Southern Decadence we hung rainbow banners up in all our windows and made special rainbow cocktails. Reasoning: the gays' money was as green as anyone else's. However, while on the whole we did well those weekends, I know that we lost SOME people who otherwise would have come in because they thought that we were a gay establishment.
I thought the cause was public toilet seats.
I think those multicolored cupcakes were refusilized because if you walked up to somebody and said, "You've got great cupcakes" anything could happen.
I have a couple of friends who are gay and, we enjoy each others' company.
I also have some acquaintances who are NOT friends who knew that we were friends.
One of them was so dense that she asked me if I wasn't afraid I'd catch gayness from associating with them.
I actually did laugh right in her face and walked away.
To this day, I don't speak to that idiot.
Oh, yeah. I'm hetero.
I tried a bite of one of these cupcakes and immediately wanted nachos instead. Does this make me transsexual? If so, which bathroom should I use?
They do look awful good. ;)
Why didn't he just... not bake the cupcakes if he didn't want to. Why the need for the big pronouncement?
People are so weird when it comes to something they don't understand, it seems the most reasonable thing would be to learn.
Thanks for your commentary and the yummy looking cupcakes.
rated with love.
People are stupid...they can't see past their own agenda. It is sad and I can see why it can be so insulting and annoying. Hard to ignore sometimes, but enjoy and live in the peacefulness of what is you..know what I mean?
@ Mishima & Leandra Nolting: I thought one of the themes of the civil rights movement was that offering service to the public meant providing service to the public, not just the parts of it you approve of or like or think are good enough for you.

On the other hand, I can see refusing to make those particular cupcakes because they're ugly and they look like a lot of work. I'd make different flavored cakes with rainbow icing, myself. Yup, because once you ice those the rainbow is hidden - in the closet. The icing would be right up front.
Mishima 666 has a Real Problem with Teh Ghey.

Leendra wants our money -- after which she wants us to go away.
I prefer strudel. What does that make me? Polyflavored?

Well, now that I think of it, when I was a little kid my favorite birthday cake, the one I absolutely *had* to have, was a rainbow cake. That's when I started noticing the workmen on our new garage. And that was way before the link between rainbows and same-sex attraction had been discovered. I think there's something to it. Those cupcakes are great!

I've been eating multi-coloured cupcakes (amongst other things) for years n' years - how come I don't get to be gay?!!!

It ain't fair. Other people ALWAYS get to have ALL the fun......

(lower lip protrudes)

(goes off into the corner to pout)
Can you force a baker to make hot crossed buns for Easter?
At Ye S&M Pastry Shoppe, Retablo
First a cupcake, then stealing your mother's taffetta bride's maid dress that is 2 sizes too small for her now from the back of her closet, and you are out on the front long singing Rogers and Hammerstein show tunes.

Don't you know this? What the heck is the matter with you, woman?
If he served those rainbow cupcakes, gay people would frequent his establishment and touch things and then he might accidentally bring home 'gay cooties' and cause his daughters to get 'the gay'. Sheesh! He's already proved himself to be immune from the 'intelligence cooties'; he should be safe.
Congratulations on your EP. Great post.
Best Wishes,
Is it OK to just lick the frosting off gay cupcakes?
Humor is a perfect way to combat the idiot homo-haters.
Young people get their ideas of what's right from their parents , and others. "Influence", it's called, and cupcake wars are part of it. But let's look on the bright side: if enough young people are convinced that being "Gay" is just fine, we'll be on the way to solving the Overpopulation problem. At the cost of re-defining "Normalcy".
Geez...I wouldn't eat them simply because they're loaded with toxic coloring. Ugh. NOBODY should be eating that crap anymore!

Though, I must be the voice of dissent here. I don't agree with the guy at all, obviously (if you know me even remotely) but it IS his choice. He lost the business as a result but one can be bullied into openness.
rather shrill!

but rated :)
It's meant to be a free world. If they don't want to make multi-colored cupcakes, they don't have to. Why are you complaining their use of their rights?
lmao welp i just did a confetti cake to be gay or not to be gay ?
i been called a lot worser things by better people but i'm still eating my cake any one else want sum?
I think he's right. I just had to look at the picture and now I have a strong urge to... uhm... can I say suck a cock here?
I just wanted a cupcake. Darn. {:
Well, I'm delighted that this question has finally been sorted out.

Now, on to the biggie: what is the cause of heterosexuality? Is it mustard? That's my theory, because I put mustard on everything, and my brother doesn't, and he's, well, let's just say he's a huge fan of Donna Summer and Judy Garland.
@ Safe_Pet's Amy: "Hi" Lesh. You STILL suck, BTW. Now go fuck off. Bye.
I'm laughing so hard! Those crazy bakers and all of that POWER!
Those cupcakes look good. Wait...does this mean???

I have to admit that I'd never looked at it from that perspective before, Miss Garboil.
I can't believe how much this post was spammed. Come on OS leaders, help! We shouldn't be buried like this!
All this spam can be easily removed by you, Safe Bet Amy.

Well, the one thing you can count on in this world is that stupid is all around. And this is particularly stupid. But of course cupcakes have always been so controversial.
Sorry folks, but 99.99% of the "spam" on this post is done as harassment by Lesh under his "Garboil" alter. I am leaving it up because I placed a complaint against him and I don't want to delete it until they have a chance to see it.
I feel compelled to make these cupcakes. I am not coming out. Don't get your hopes up.
So, it had nothing to do with the fact that making a multi-colored cup cake was just too difficult for the baker to manage?

My hats off to any baker who can master a rainbow cupcake. My hats off to anyone who can pull out a decent shade of purple.
It's that darn Red Dye Number Whatever!

With that degree of hysteria about it, one has to wonder if one of their daughters has shown a preference for power tools and trucks.
All the best to you and yours, but maybe they (the bakers) don't feel that this is their cause. Or maybe they feel that their kids are too young for them to explain homosexuality to. Maybe they are not political people. Or maybe they were being rather "pressured" to make these "symbolic" cupcakes and didn't appreciate that. All they said, really, was that they thought it best not to do this. They mentioned they were family-owned.

Do you have more of the details? In fairness to these bakers, perhaps it would have been nice to get them.

Again, all the best.
The cupcakes look quite tasty. The baker in question is a dumb ass if purely from a business standpoint. From a point of civility he was also rude.
Yet there is an abundance of stupidity and rudeness in this country and it is quite legal. Would one be obliged to bake Swastika or Pornographic cupcakes... ? Or crosses or pentagrams? Or Cleveland Browns Logos in a Pittsburgh bakery ? People are going to discriminate. It really was his option as a free citizen to refuse the order because it was a symbol of a movement that he does not appreciate. Joking and piling on like this is immature. It does not make for any serious discussion. This happens all the time on Open Salon. A lot of the time (not always) it emanates from the gay or feminist members. Mishima 666 has it right. Lesh did too only not as politely. Simply fed up..
I will forevermore use that picture when I say "come to the dark side, we have cookies!"
Bloody hysterical. Yanno, I line my polo shirts up in the closet in spectrum order. Am I trying to send a message or just keep track of my damned clothes? Sheesh!
When my children were young I used to cover their eyes whenever a rainbow appeared in the sky!

Not really, but it doesn't sound any more absurd than this!
Thank God...I had no idea why that happens. I can name my grandma as the culprit....multicolored sprinkles and all...
I'm so glad there is another holiday, and very colorful food to go with it!
Silly me. I'm more concerned that the dyes are not carcinogenic.
I'd laugh if I wasn't so annoyed with dumbassery.
And no doubt when the bigot bakery lands in the bankruptcy courts they will cry victim. Remember America has places for such entrepreneurs. We call those places bankruptcy courts and underemployment lines. They will also, no doubt, cry victim when their kids grow up to despise them.
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