The plateau is proving to be long and wide. I shall have to try harder. As with many people, my struggles with my weight began when I was in college and fighting to keep awake to study for exams or finish term papers. I was a slender child and teenager. But by the time I was into my late twenties, I had to watch my weight. I still went through periods of being thin, but the weight would always come back.

    I found myself in a difficult marriage, and though I stayed married for nineteen years, I kept falling in love with other men. The last time this happened to me I was already divorced but still prone to falling in love or finding myself attracted to the wrong man. I had a real gift for this affliction.

    A while back I posted about the time I fell in love with my much younger boss. When I started the job, I weighed 177 but as I began to feel the attraction settling in I quickly lost 40 pounds. When he left for San Francisco, I gained it all back just as quickly.

    Now, however, I have a new mind set which I hope will prove to be more fruitful. It's not about my appearance anymore. It's about my health. I want to live my life free of medications, and I desperately want to stay active. I shall put my rocking chair in storage and dust off my bicycle. I'm tempted to give up my cable TV.

    From now on, I'm promising myself, I shall live a more ascetic lifestyle. I shall take frequent walks and eat modest meals. Today I walked to the post office and the library, and that's only a start. Wish me luck and success.