Feeling that Rick Warren wasn’t enough to prove he means what he says about talking with those with whom he disagrees, Barack Obama asked another controversial person to speak at his inauguration.

In an astonishing announcement, President-elect Barack Obama sent the country reeling and left loquacious pundits speechless by announcing a last minute speaker.

At a hastily called press conference, Obama spokesman Hasty Call, said the president-elect invited white supremacist, self-ordained preacher man and president of the South Shall rise Again, Langford T. Rednecker to give the second invocation.

Saying he is passionately determined to bring people of opposing views together, Obama defended his choice of Rednecker to speak at the inauguration, to prove he meant what he said.

“It’s beside the point that Rednecker is a disgusting individual, who is still living in the 19^th Century, and a white supremacist who wants to re-enslave all American-Africans, or kill us off and still wants the South to secede from the Union.” Obama said.

“This is still a free country and he has the Constitutional-given right to express his opinions and goals no matter how outrageous, disgusting and offensive they are, or how much they are contrary to everything we stand for,” Obama added, “everyone should have a place at the discussion table.”

In that light, Obama also said that after he’s sworn into office he will arrange for Warren, and Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad to sit across the table from each other and have three cups of tea as suggested by radio talk host Thom Hartmann to discuss their differences.

Hartmann said this long-standing tradition of having three cups of tea while discussing differences of opinion have swayed some minds to take more moderate positions.

Skeptics fear that rather than talking, Warren, who has advocated assassinating Ahmadinejad, will smite him with his mighty “god-blessed” sword.

Those same skeptics also wonder if Warren, who has firmly entrenched beliefs, and has compared gay marriage to incest and bestiality; is anti-abortion under any circumstances; and doesn’t believe in evolution can ever be changed to a more moderate view no matter how many cups of tea he drinks or rational arguments are made to him.

Agreeing with Obama’s position is Vice President Elect Joe Biden, who said the “ultimate reconciliation” amongst us is accomplished through discussion.

In keeping with Obama’s determination to expand meetings of un-like-minded people, he’s arranged for colorful discussions among devotees of feng shui to meet with proponents of Chinese modern, French provincial and new wave ultra modern decorators.

Geraldo Rivera will anchor debates among chair-throwing political candidates.

He’s more than likely barking up the wrong tree in suggesting that dog people can meet with cat people and not scratch each others eyes out.

Separate cages will be needed for the zoo people versus game park enthusiasts.

Jerry Springer will moderate the debate between beer drinking, wife swapping trailer park trash and members of the Emily Post Society.

Speculators agree that it will be a cold day in hell if lovers of chocolate ice cream can reach an accord with vanilla or strawberry lovers. Resolute that they are correct, fans of Chunky Monkey and Chubby Hubby have refused to participate.

In discussing the upcoming Difference of Opinion conferences, Obama Press Secretary B. Levy Mee, said no meetings will be scheduled between Cubs and Sox or Yankees and Mets fans.

“It’s just too dangerous,” Mee said.

Because of the recent shoe throwing incident in Iraq and the public outrage at Obama’s selection of the gay-woman-science-hating Warren and the hate-everyone-but-his-own-sleazy-kind Rednecker to give the invocations, the Secret Service has issued orders that all inaugural attendees will have their shoes Crazy glued to their feet.

Hartmann: http://www.opednews.com/articles/Three-Cups-of-Tea-for-Rick-by-Thom-Hartmann-081218-45.html