**Can also be read at http://www.viewshound.com/lifestyle-other/2011/11/10/im-a-man-and-ive-been-cained
Are you one of the people who think women are the only ones that can be sexually harassed in the work place? Well, my friend, you would be wrong. As a young kid, fresh out of high school and working my first public job, I was the victim of repeated sexual harassment that went on for almost a year. As a matter of fact, it went on until I left the job after a run-in with management. There were seven women, and myself, that first year and I caught it from all sides.
I didn't attend college, to my regret, and my mother was not about to let me lay around the house, and sleep all day and party all night, which is what I was doing the first few weeks after high school. One morning, my mother came into my room and woke me from a beautiful sleep, and started raising the roof. The next morning, I was out looking for work, and found a job that very day. It was for a company that built mobile homes, and it was very hard work.
The building was set-up much like the assembly lines in Detroit, where they can build a car ready to be driven, in a matter of hours. At this plant, the welders started at one end of the building, making a steel frame, and from there, the frame was pushed up to another department, until it arrived at the end of the line. It was then a mobile home, so complete that a family could move into it. When they pushed it out of the door, besides a few odds and ends, you had a finished product. We built 10 mobile homes a day, and if you saw how they were built, you would never buy one, I assure you.
I was given a job in the Trim Department. After they put the floors on the frame, they would build and attach the sidewalls, put on the ceiling, then paneling was installed throughout the home. We, the 7 girls and myself, would then put the molding and trim up, to hide all the cracks and cover up the gaps. We were the ones who made the mobile home look great. The ones who fixed the mistakes, to make sure the buyers would never see where people screwed something up. I knew absolutely nothing about trim work, so I was the go-fer for the first few months. Go for this, and go for that. The abuse started the very first day.
After the Production Foreman introduced me to the woman in charge, he left me surrounded by seven women, and I was the only man. The sexual harassment started almost immediately. The first thing I heard from one of the girls was, "Alright, we got us some fresh meat. He's a young one too, let me break him in". They all fell about laughing. The thing is, so did I. For the next year, I was called, "Sweetheart", Baby-doll, Honey, etc., etc. etc. I was also asked, kiddingly, to have sex. They mentioned threesomes, foursomes and even eight-somes, if there is such a thing.
The thing is, it was funny and I loved every minute of it. We became the closest of friends. Some of the girls were in their thirties and forties, and a few were a little older than myself. We became a unit that could push ten mobile homes out the door, every day, and have a great time doing it. The work was hard. Hot in summer, with no air conditioning, and cold in winter, with no heat. We laughed and insulted each other all the time, even as management were urging us to work harder, and faster.
One day, management announced they now wanted 12 mobiles homes a day, finished, and out the door. They wanted this, but also wanted it all done for the same amount of pay, and in the same amount of hours. All my girls, my friends, grabbed their tools and walked out. They said, "No raise, no work, period". They virtually shut the plant down! Management gave in, but refused to hire the girls back. I was still relatively new, and was transferred to the door department, where I worked hanging doors in the homes. I averaged hanging 10 doors per home, and hung a 100 doors a day. It was back-breaking work.
A few weeks later, I was talked into being the new Lead Man, in the Trim Department. They had a shake-up in management, and I was able to re-hire many of the girls who had walked out. I was now their boss and I loved it. I was in charge of these women, who knew 10 times more about the job than I would ever know. Things went back to the way they were, and I was the boss, in name only. They did what they always did. We worked and talked smack to each other, and had a great time doing it. We talked and kidded around, and this is where sexual harassment charges against women, and men, get very, very tricky.
Was I sexually harassed? You bet I was, by anyone's definition. Did I care? Are you kidding me? Never in a million years. They became my close, close friends, who would stand up for me to anyone in the plant. I would also go to the wall for them, and ended up quitting this same job, because they would not give my girls the pay raise they so richly deserved. The girls tried talking me out of it qutting, but I was ready to move on, anyway. Above, I just wrote, they were "my girls". Isn't that, in itself, sexual harassment?
I do not know what Herman Cain did to these women. He may have tried to force these women to have sex with him, holding their job, or a promotion, over their head. I hope he gets what's coming to him, if he did it. But, in the work place, if you adhere to the laws the way they are written, you would have to be very careful of every word you said. There would be no playing around, because it could be construed as making sexual advances. Who wants to work in an environment, where you have to act like a robot?
I do not know the answers to this. If you read this thinking there would be any answers, I am sorry. But, back in my day, when seven women made a young boy like me blush every time they picked on him, I thought it was normal. I also gave, as good as I got. In today's workplace, you walk the razor's edge in everything you do and say. I'm glad I'm retired, I could not work in a place where you can't laugh and pick on each other. I guess it's too late for me to sue, right?
**This has been one of the hardest decision's I have made since joing OS. I wrote this true story, and I'm very proud of it. 99% of the comments were wonderful, and to all who commented, I want to thank you for your support. But it seems, that a few people don't get it. One person said my headline, meant that I thought my little story was on par with the heidous acts that Herman Cain perpetrated. How silly and thoughtless. I guess all the jokes on the late-night shows, all the political cartoons that have been written about Cain, mean they the same thing. How ridiculus.
One person actually said my story, and the rape of innocent little boys by Priest's in the Catholic Church, are somehow related. This is crazy, and even though these people are a minority, I cannot delete comments from people who came her for the purpose of just insulting me and my intelligence, along with a few who somehow think I could possibly condone anything Herman Caine did, or agree that somehow women are second class citizens, and not delete them all.
So I deleted them all, and to anyone who went out of their way to comment, I apoloize. I may not write on Open Salon anymore. I really love this place and have made some great friends, some for life, I hope. Anyway, I'll let you know. Thanks again for the great comments, 99% anyway, hah~~
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Alii
Steel Breeze
Eljekar
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hilarad
Lisa Tibbitts
Salon.com
Comments
The reason we have all these laws that now affect every little thing employees say when joking around is not because women are sensitive, it's because people in power who were dirtbags made them necessary.
It's the same with men who don't care that women still make over 25% less (even in female dominated jobs) and then complain that women are taking their jobs in the recession. Soon the republicans will want to ship all the working women to other countries for "stealing" their jobs. Idiots!
It's completely the fault of the perps that we are all burdened by these laws. I blame Herman Cain and his filthy ilk for all these incredibly necessary laws.
I agree with SB Amy "the constant, daily barrage of implied male superiority weighs down your soul." I do not remember a single instance of another superior coming to my aid in the workplace.
My soul is indeed weary. When will it change?