It's starting again. The 3 a.m. wake-up! It doesn't matter how tired I am the night before, at 3 a.m. my eyes pop open and I am wide awake. Usually I'm in pain when I wake up, so the first thing I do is reach for a pain pill and lay back down. After a piss break, I usually fall back to sleep as the pain hides out somewhere in the back recesses of my mind, ready to spring-back as quick as the dope wears off.
It's 3 a.m., and the alarm clock that we all have but never use goes off and I cannot find sleep, again. I lay there trying not to think of the million and three things on my mind but the more I try, millions of more thoughts overrun my mind and I am up. SHIT! The pain stops but the mind is going to do what the mind is going to do. The body has no say so, it's just a junkie following the mind around begging for its own fix, coffee in massive quantities. Then I get pissed.
What do you do at 3 a.m.? What else? Turn on the news, fire up the monkey machine and start typing while trying to find the words to be funny or clever or even stupid, if it will get you a few comments. I check my mail but at that un-Godly hour, I have nothing but junk mail that I hate. I check out some stuff on OS, but I haven't been around much this week and I have no idea if it's 80's hair week or Doppelganger Day. Just kidding, I thought they were great ideas. I don't look like anyone famous, of infamous for that matter.
I don't know why this is happening. I am doing nothing more or nothing less than I do everyday, but here I am at 3 a.m. typing this crap for OS that will be read by my friends (i hope) and maybe some others, but mostly friends I have made over the last three years. People I love and respect. I am having a problem with the powers that be again about what constitutes an Editor's Pick. I don't seem to know the rules or I do not write well enough to get one. The Editor and I talked about it one time. She explained it to me in detail.
She said the Editor's Pick works in mysterious ways. I had a religious experience as I read her message. An EP and God, both working in mysterious ways. I guess you have to have Faith before believing either one exists. Yep, she told me that I would not understand the inner workings of Open Salon. The 'nut's and bolt's' I guess. That was over a year ago and the more I see how EP's are picked, the dumber I get. I guess I'll never figure it out. Some people are on the cover so much that I am surprised when I go to the front to check on new posts being written and do "not' see them on it.
Maybe I'm just grouchy, this no sleep thing has been going on for over a week now and I'm getting by on 3 or 4 hours a night. I hear some people can deal with it, I can't. I need a solid eight hours to live, period. The Editor here has never liked me. She came in at a time of turmoil on OS and I was directly in the middle of it. She wrote me a letter that was total bullshit. But it wasn't her fault. She was inundated with PM's from people who were lying to her and she didn't know who to believe. After the problem was told to leave, I think she still disliked me for some reason. I know not why.
You may ask, what the hell have you wrote that deserves an EP? Well, you may have a point. Nothing really, but I have won small praise on other sites with the same stuff I put on OS, and OS management doesn't seem to think, or know, I exist. Even a blind hog digs up an acorn every now and again, so just by the luck of the draw or the fact that I am at or near the top of the ratings at times, would seem to draw some attention. But I have to admit, I'm not a Mad Man fan or DWTS or an American Idol fan. I do use some profanity, but no where near what I used to. I don't need to use it, but I like to use the word "fuck" every now and again. On the Eastwood post, which did pretty good by the way, I started it off with, "What the Fuck was that?" No good, huh?
But I do have a compadre who gets screwed worse than I do. My buddy Tinkerman69 gets fewer EP's than I do, if that's possible. Look at the Top Rated and my man is there. Look at the Top Rated for the Past Day and my man is usually there. I don't get it. If your stuff brings in readers and people like it enough to stop what they are doing to read it, why is it not worthy of an EP. For the people on the cover, you belong there, I love reading you. But I guess we'll have to go with the Editor's explanation that an OS EP is a lot like God. It works in some very mysterious ways.
It's now 5:17 a.m., please, disregard what I just wrote. I swear, I could care less about an EP. I get enough attention, but when I see others that deserve one but the same old buddy system is being used day after day, it gets the hair on the back of my neck up a bit. But, just a bit~~