What does a football center and a colonoscopy have in common? Someone is always bending you over and putting their hands in your ass.. I had a colonoscopy yesterday and watched the whole thing on a television monitor as they cut off four polyps. It was 10 times more interesting than any football game I've ever seen. Of course, I haven't watched too many games in the last ten years, so there is that. I was a sports junkie for many years and would watch any sport. When they showed the guy on ABC's Wide World of Sports, who is simply known as "that agony of defeat" guy, I used to laugh like hell. You know you did too, right?
First, about the colon. I was under the impression I would be knocked out and wake up and the procedure would be over. Boy, was I fooled. They put some kind of pain-killer in my IV and the surgeon went to work. I was in shock. No one told me to look at the monitor or "this will be over before you know it." Nothing.
But truthfully, besides the huge ice cold butcher knife he used to cut the polyp's off with, it didn't hurt a bit. What really hurt were the two days I couldn't eat before the precedure. The first day, I could only eat popsicles and jello and other sucky foods. But after midnight Tuesday, I couldn't have any water or food. Once I got a good look inside my colon, I could understand why. Uhmg~~
But, It was kind of cool. It was like watching a horror movie and you are slowly walking through a dark cave with a helmet with a light on top. I kept looking for little people to start running from the light and giving me the finger as they ran. When the doctor found a polyp, he said "open" and he placed a small finger-nail type of thing over the polyps then and said, "close" and off the polyp would go.
To where, only the doctor and the little people giving me the finger know for sure. I ended up have four polyps removed and I guess he kept one to send off to check for cancer. But, all in all, not a bad experience, even though I was awake through-out the whole thing. I was asleep and happy when I had my first colonoscopy . Next time I'll ask. Duh!
Yeah, Football. Put the pig in the ground and the beer of ice, all my rowdy friends are coming....,oh, wait, they fired Hank Williams Jr. for being a bigot. I have to say, I used to like Ole' Hank Jr. He was wild like I was at about the same time, doing drugs and falling off of cliffs. I was doing drugs and driving off of cliffs, not a lot of difference, believe me.
I can understand Hank Jr. not wanting President Obama to be re-elected, hell, it's his right. Also, although I think it's insane, I can even understand why a person would be a conservative. What I can't figure out, and what former President Clinton clarified in a Kick-Ass speech last night, is the pure-hate they have for Obama. There's only one reason you hate someone like that and it damn sure doesn't have anything to do with politics.
I wasn't going to say anything about the Democratic National Convention, (DNC) because I didn't have anything to compare it to, not having watched the republican convention. But, I do hear things and I have learned to read a bit so I have to say, if the republicans would have put together a convention like the democrats and had the speakers with the talent and speaking ability that the democrats had, I would have make it a point to find it on the red-side of the Internet and see some of the videos.
I won't say another word about politics, but Clinton hit the nail on the head when he said this about the republicans. Grover Norquist's contract to make every member of Congress sign a pledge to never raise taxes in this country again, no matter the cause, is ludicrous. No one knows what will happen in the future and these teaparty idiots who say "NO" to every bill sent to them by Obama and then run to the first camera they can find and say Obama is doing nothing for this country, are nothing but hypocrites who are doing their best to destroy this country from the top down. They have no idea they are being used by Rove, Norquist & Company for their own profit. Thanks and remember to eat plenty of Bran.