Scruffus

Scruffus
Location
St. Thomas, USVI
Bio
Seashell picker, coconut thief, beach connoisseur, food critic, terrorizer of the harbor, lizard hospital supervisor, conjurer of sunrises, and scourge of the seas.

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Editor’s Pick
JULY 14, 2010 10:34PM

When Your Vacation Ends With a Death

There is a rising presence of gangs and violence in the Virgin Islands. While Mexico gets much of the press for the violence incurred by the drug cartels, the Caribbean is slowly catching up. 

Around the end of June, there was a daytime shooting at K-Mart. A teenaged man walked up… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
JUNE 25, 2009 12:16AM

About That Litter of Kittens You Dumped

So you ended up with a surprise litter of kittens and you didn't know what to do. You didn't expect your cat to get pregnant but it all happened so fast and placing the kittens in good homes wasn't as easy as you thought. You didn't like the idea of taking… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
APRIL 15, 2009 6:43PM

Tea Party on the Delaware

Trenton, NJ

 Tea Party. April 15, 2009.

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The shining gold dome of the statehouse belies the severe financial straits our state and citizens have found themselves in. As residents of New Jersey, we are some of the most heavily taxed people in the United States. Many… Read full post »
Editor’s Pick
MARCH 5, 2009 7:42PM

Career Fair

"What is your name and what career do you represent?"

"My name is Scruffus and I'm a chemist."

 "List three duties of your job."

"I analyze samples, make reagents, and keep records." 

"What is the level of education needed for this job?"

"Bachelor's degree."

"What class in high school helpe… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
FEBRUARY 3, 2009 10:39PM

My Son, The Pagan

"Mom, what's a pagan?", my son asked when I walked in the door from work yesterday. I thought he was studying something in history. Trying to give my best off-the-cuff definition of a pagan, I explained that it was a broad term used to describe people who were non-Christians. 

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When… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
FEBRUARY 1, 2009 9:43PM

I Sold My Camaro Today

My Camaro was a divine thing to drive. It gave me the feeling of getting away with something, a euphoric mix of naughtiness and irreverence. 

 The first day I saw it, I knew it would be mine. The radio was already tuned to a rock station when I first turned the… Read full post »

Spanning the Delaware River, the Trenton Makes Bridge in giant neon red letters proclaims to all, "Trenton Makes, The World Takes.". Hearkening back to the time when Trenton was a center of manufacture, these days the sign seems a bit of an anachronism. Trenton and many other American cities have dec… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
JANUARY 17, 2009 8:33PM

Laboratory Haiku

At work in the lab, there are times when I have to babysit a reaction or procedure in case something goes wrong, but usually, nothing exciting happens and there's plenty of time to think and write silly poems on the hood sash.   

 

Safety officer

inspected the lab poorly

Did… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
DECEMBER 25, 2008 8:46PM

Last Meal

His eyes stared at the pavement. His skin was a soft warm brown color and looked so perfectly healthy in the bright December sun. He still carried the glow of life. He was dressed for a blustery day, but the weather was surprisingly mild. The sharp angles of the concrete steps… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
DECEMBER 5, 2008 9:09AM

Worst Job: Learning to Take My Clothes Off While Upside Down

I had climbed 15 feet in the air and with an audience watching, it was now or never. I wrapped my thighs around the brass pole, crossed my legs and let go of the grip I had with my hands. Gently and surprisingly, I bent my body downwards, but I did… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
NOVEMBER 30, 2008 11:56AM

How the Jehovah's Witnesses Helped Grandpa Fall in Love

When the Jehovah's Witnesses come around, most people draw the curtains, put out the lights and refuse to answer the door. The day the Jehovah's Witnesses came to visit my grandparents was a little different in that the Witnesses in question were Grandpa's younger brother and his wife who traveled fr… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
NOVEMBER 16, 2008 1:50PM

My Five Dads

Dad #1

My real dad is called only by his first name. I never call him dad. This industrial strength deadbeat has a colorful history and it's probably best that I don't know him better. He's made a few cameo appearances in my life. Mostly he preferred prison to parenthood. Once,… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
NOVEMBER 9, 2008 8:33PM

No Child Left Inside

Is there a such thing as nature-deficit disorder? Can our children be harmed by a lack of exposure to nature and wilderness areas?

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Growing up, I was lucky to live with my grandparents who owned four acres on a private lane bordered by about twenty acres of city-owned woods. The… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
NOVEMBER 4, 2008 10:50AM

Election Day is a Day Off for Me! Hooray!

Today is a day off for me because where I work thinks voting is important enough that they will pay you to stay home and go vote. That's one of the perks of working for the government. Although it is a day off, I didn't get to sleep in or anything… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
OCTOBER 27, 2008 10:13PM

The Mad Scientist in Your Neighborhood

It's always exciting when you read about someone you know in the news. A friend from college made the local news over the weekend. 

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The story seemed a bit overblown and sensationalized, complete with pictures of the Haz-Mat team in their spiffy yellow suits. The reporter

Read full post »
Editor’s Pick
OCTOBER 19, 2008 12:31AM

Can You Believe What Your Brother Did?

Granny sat comfortably in the chair just inside Mom's bathroom. She was covered in towels to keep away a chill. My sister was fixing Granny's freshly washed hair and I was working on Granny's feet. This was our ritual when I came to town. We would bathe Granny, my sister would… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
OCTOBER 6, 2008 6:54PM

On Ramblers and Food Banks

About seven years ago, I was talking to Grandpa and he mentioned how Granny's prescriptions were beginning to cost a whole lot. He listed the things she had to take every day and how much it cost a month to keep those prescriptions filled. Grandpa, nearly eighty years old, still worked… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
SEPTEMBER 15, 2008 10:35AM

Visiting Vermont

Using the Telenav feature on a Blackberry phone can get you to some interesting places by way of some even more interesting routes. We went to Stratton Mountain yesterday and the Telenav sent us down a dirt logging road to get there. A sign at the beginning of the road announced… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
SEPTEMBER 5, 2008 4:44PM

What Teen Pregnancy Feels Like For the Non-Republican Teen

I don't believe Bristol's pregnancy should be news but since it is, I have a hard time feeling any sympathy for her situation. It hits a raw nerve in me because I've been there and I wasn't greeted with a loving and accepting family. I got what most unwed teenage mothers-to-be… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
AUGUST 24, 2008 10:33PM

Oregon Trail

I went to Oregon for a class in radiochemistry (good times). I live on the other, more humid coast. I had some time one night after class so I decided to make the drive to see the Pacific Ocean. I'd never seen the Pacific Ocean in person before. The Pacific beaches… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
AUGUST 20, 2008 9:24PM

Chunky Dunk

There was a story on yesterday about a couple who is in trouble with their city because they were running a swingers club for heavy people out of their home. The city was upset with them because they felt the couple was operating a business without a license and wanted their… Read full post »