FIrst of all, Happy Belated Birthday. Second of all, this sounds like love! Third of all (is that even correct?); First!

The farmer is a fortunate fellow.

Tom Waits rules. So does your poetry. Loved both today!

My grandfather was a farmer. My father thought himself one, too. A different kind of love, I know, but still.
I've read this four times already. It forces my own back to bend, a protective stance, knowing he holds earth and Life and Love in his hands.

This is so evocative it almost tastes good. And I'm a Tom Waits fan too. Great Sunday post and happy belated b-day.

What a nice Sunday Morning post. Thank you Thank you!

so much to unearth in four stanzas. even in its simplicity. your poetry is rich.

Beautiful!

Beautiful Scupper. I love the poem and how it fits so well with the song and the image. Oh and did I miss a Birthday? Hope it was most happy.

"The hunger in your heart,
pining,
wanting"

lovely and vivid, old time love...

What wonder and love. This is a grand gift you have. Thank you for sharing.
Rated.

it reminded me of seeing a hawk hovering over a field (well, minus the first group)

Beautiful.

Hi scupper. I like the motion of these verses, as they zoom in from a distance, closing in on the subject's heart: 1. working, 2. seeking, 3. waiting, 4. pining. It's as though we're walking toward him (him?), he comes into focus, and then we go right past looking at him, to feeling what he feels. It's hard to look away untouched.

Thank you all for reading.

Bard, I want the "walking" tempo you mention, and added length to the "day" with the syllables in the last line of each stanza (3,4,5,6,) to accomplish the rhythm of the step.
I'm still working on the last stanza. The first line has an extra syllable and the meaning isn't quite right. The hunger-- I want a word of angst with a form more like squint (cup, curve).

Suggestions welcome!

Scupper I'm just lost here. Tom was lovely but couldn't remember how he got there either. Anyways we had a beer.

sensual poem, and a gem of a song, a favorite also.

There is something about good honest work and putting your hands in the dirt! Down Home!

sorry for your loss -
but it sure prods you to write surprisingly fine work.

such visual descriptions, thank you.

Hollow?

Thanks Julie.
I like hollow, but not quite like a squint, is it? And I used hollowing in the preceding. A puzzle.

Kim,
Two men once brought (then) husband to the door. They said, "he was lost and we found him. Where shall we put him?" I think I responded, "Leave him on the porch."

Ah, scupper. Shame on me, for missing the increasing syllable count. But as for your last verse, I take a lot from the broken sequence: cup, squint, curve, hunger. That last, 2-syllable word breaks its little corner of the form, and demands we listen. "Hunger", on first reading, was the word that drew me in. Just sayin'.

Hmmm. A twist.
I recognize the hunger in pining.
I recognize the break in the pattern (also the break in the internal vowel pattern- (u/a, i/e, u/a/u/e).

Maybe it's not the hunger. Maybe it's the shadow. A beat? I'm beat.
If I close my eyes, the muse may come.

scupper don't you just love it when we pick your poem apart ?

I'm listening to you & db, and making notes.

Thankyou - this is all just great. Getting there ...

best wishes,

Lovely as the length of the day......

yeah, I'm no help, I'm stuck on valley or basin, which eh..
I'm enjoying reading the dialogue, too Kim. Damn, I never think about any poem. The few I've tried to rewrite Karen says sound stilted.
So I'd go with hunger, if that is what came from your gut Scupper. But you being a teacher, you will probably pick at it until it unravels. :)

You're so right Julie. I almost always paralyze and pick and paralyze and pick and then toss it in a trunk. Trunks everywhere in stacks, filled with unraveled lines.

I think "hunger" works: It speaks frankly of fundamentals.

When I get stuck on a word, I post. As you did, scupper.

I have two guides on this: first is Arianna Huffington, who was on Jon Stewart some time ago, basically encouraging anyone who wanted to blog to just jump in, and do so -- your writing doesn't have to be polished to perfection. This was key.

And Linus Pauling. It was an epiphany when I first heard him say (and he said it frequently), "The way to get good ideas is to get lots of ideas, and throw the bad ones away."

scupper I think we might all benefit if you opened those trunks up a little.

And having slept on it, I still like "hunger."

Scupper... beautiful poem. I need to catch up on more of your work. You have an amazing way with words and visual images to mind.

Um, I love the tags. And "squint". Form eludes me...I bow to braver souls.

Oh, and I like hunger and really like "wrestling wane." Doesn't hunger go beyond what's there?