Our son turned three last summer, and like respectable parents, we're sending him to a preschool so far above our pay rate that it's making me question my own sanity.  

            Lately my wife and I have discussed, in a casual manner, speaking in the purely hypothetical, what it would be like to live in another country.  For some reason these conversations often make us feel guilty, like we should keep our voices low and make sure no one is peeping in the windows, as if we were conspiring to escape Soviet Russia.  We don't discuss it in front of our extended family, even as a hypothetical, not even as a thought exercise, for fear of their shock and horror.  They're not exactly the 'America, Love It or Leave It,' crowd, but the idea that this isn't the absolute, most exalted, greatest, awesomest country in the whole world, is literally inconceivable to most of them.

            No one should base a decision as massive as where to raise a family on arbitrary lists:  But those lists reflect a certain reality, whether they be as subjective as quality of life surveys or more objective measures such as crime rate (seriously now, what the fuck is happening in this country that the crime rate is 15 times higher than the average?),  and weeks of paid vacation (the Unites States is the ONLY industrialized nation that “does not require employers to grant any vacation or holidays”).

             These conversations were not spurred on by any particular event (though living in New York on 9/11 was definitely a catalyst), but whenever something terrible happens, something somehow uniquely American in its awfulness, whenever we hear about another abused child, another pointless murder, Sarah Palin speaking (or Tweeting or posting or…), the conversation is rekindled. 

            What, exactly, keeps us here?  There’s the language barrier, of course (though many western European countries speak English), the logistical difficulties involved in moving to another country, concerns over employment options, and, of course, the expense.  We’ve joked that would could claim political asylum (‘we’re oppressed because we don’t have free healthcare and education costs are through the roof!”).

            Of course, there’s the question of our extended families – my mother and two brothers, my wife’s brother and parents, the cousins that our son is just starting to know and love (but who live over 200 miles away and only see twice a year).  When would we ever see them?  What would we do if there was some sort of tragedy? 

            Is the U.S. eminently better than some countries? Of course. Better to be lower middle class (working poor) in America than say, in Tajikistan.  But if we’re going to compare, that’s a scale that goes up as well as down.  I can’t help but wonder how many Swiss or Norwegians are sitting at work right now wondering if they would be better off in Sweden or France.