I call under the table!

Shaggy, I thought Steve was partial to the Powerpuff girls....or was it Hello Kitty? Anyways, the spread looks great...good job! Happy Birthday, Steve!!! Woo Hoo!!!

Very thoughtful, shaggy!

Happy Birthday, Steve!

Very clever Shaggy. But I saw him lurking over at the most recent posts last night. Turn off the lights before he wakes up.

I've got on my best party dress and shiny patent leathershoes, I can hardly wait!!!

Now, I have to go find a gift...

(sotto voce) Can't wait to see the cake!

Happy Birthday, Steve!

oh, this is excellent!!! and from another Masshole too!!! i'm a former bostonian but always one at heart.

Happy Happy Happy Birthday, Steve!!! you are a fabulous man and writer with a wicked sense of humor. Fucking A you are! love love love and huge gratitude for you, shaggy, for doing this lovely tihng and for the wonder that is Steve!!

He is going to be sooooo surprised when Freaky jumps out of that cake!

Happy birthday, Steve!

You rock.

Happy Birthday, Doctor Steve! (Pretend I sang that like Marilyn)

Happy Birthday Doc!
Pretty sneaky there Shags :)

STEVE BLEVINS!!! Oh... sorry... shhhhhh... yes... I'll be quiet.

Happy Birthday Steve Blevins!! What? It's a stage whisper... shhhhhh.

I found it! The perfect gift!

From www.pocketprotectors.com.

"You're bold, practical, self-confident, and you don't give a hoot what other people think about you... you wear a pocket protector! We're not trying to win new converts to the joys of pocket protectors--it's probably too late to reach you if you don't! You already know whether you've got the necessary self-esteem.

The real challenge for us pocket protector aficionados is WHERE to buy one! Now, through the wonders of cyberspace, you've found the place! My sole mission is to provide quality pocket protectors to discriminating enthusiasts all over the world!

I have FIVE pocket protector models... The "Stealth", the "Full Monty" , the "Invisible", the "Badge Holder", and the "Side Holder".

I think I'll go all out and get him one of each!

Happy Birthday Dr. Steve ...

~from March 22 ~ xoxoxoxoxox

Yesterday, I read Shaggylock's brilliant post and was moved to respond. I have reproduced his imaginative sonnet and my reply.

Elegy to the Memory of an Unfortunate Machine

This worn out PC has a broken key
Which once was stuck, but now no longer works.
So I can’t type the letter after “C”
Which means my prose is full of clumsy quirks.

Now, looking back, it seems I never knew
How effortless my writing was before.
Why can’t these freak malfunctions happen to
A letter with a higher Scrabble score?

With my thesaurus open next to me
I try to get my emails to make sense.
They’re full of offbeat terminology
Plus all my verbs are stuck in present tense!

With only twenty-five men in the game
I miss the one I use to sign my name.

By: Jon & Mary’s First Born Son



Shaggylocks Needs to Buy a Keyboard

I can’t imagine how you write this way --
Without a “d,” in perfect sonnet form!
“Shall I Compare Thee to a Summer’s Day,”
Without a “d,” would never have been born.

When I attempt to write “d”– less verse,
I fail before the second line is writ.
Yet, doth your sonnet nimbly reimburse
A perfect meter with a perfect wit.

Now, may I make a small suggestion, please?
Take no offense; I’m trying to assist:
A keyboard can be bought with no unease –
One with a “d” that shall not leave you pissed.

Reclaim your letter, Poet of the Plain!
For when you write, you never write in vain.

By: Guy with a functioning keyboard

Great - Blevins is into "Disney Princesses"? Why didn't anyone tell me? Now, what am I going to do with this 4-pound "Hannah-Barabara Crackwhores" cake? Where's Freaky??

Happy birthday anyway!

Happy Birthday Steve!!!!!

Happy Birthday to Steve...boy is he gonna be surprised! And the video of Marilyn Monroe...that's gonna put one big grin on his face. Thanks for the invitation.

surprise! surprise! surprise!

one, two ... haaaaaaapy biiiiiiiiiiiiirthdaaay toooo yoooooou, haaaaapy biiiiiirthdaaaaa -- what? not yet?

Sorry I'm late. . .parking the car. Here, where do I put this? On the gift table? Oh, thanks. Where's Freaky with that cake?

Happy birthday, Steve, and many more. When you show up. SURPRISE!

Seriously guys, HIDE! And remember, NO ASS RAPING! I must insist on that. We don't want his mom to stop him from coming to our future OS parties!

Why did we trust Freaky with the cake? Like Steve's ever going to see that thing! I'll get some pies just in case.

Happy B-day Steve!

Aw, Madre, you dug up the ol' sonnet battle! Which reminds me, I still own this man a Spenserian sonnet. Maybe I sohluda given him that instead of Marilyn...

Key of G okay with everyone? One strum and we'll all come in.

Steve - you grace these pages. Many happy.

{running around looking for an available hiding spot}

Cool! I love parties!
Happy Birthday Steve!

{settles for hiding in plain view--look...I'm a coat-rack!}

Sorry to disappoint you guys, but Steve's birthday is in January. Walter's is today. Surprise!

I'll hide on top of that little table by looking like a cadaver.

Is he here yet?

I invited him over to hang out and play PlayStation, but he hasn't shown up yet...

Good excuse for a party, anyway. Pass the vino.

I am absolutely verklempt! (I have no idea what that means, but it sounds soooo right.) Shags, I am speechless. Thanks so much for this. And thanks, everybody, for all the super-nice comments.

I’ve been away from OS for a while because the dean of the medical school asked me to create a ten-week that prepares medical students for their clinical clerkships. As I was leaving his office, he said, “Oh, and by the way, Steve, I like your blog.” Yikes! The freakin’ dean of the medical school has been reading my ass-raping, Freaky-killing posts! It’s just a matter of time ‘til the ax falls. Lesson: always use a pseudonym.

Shags, you’re the best. Truly the best. I was first attracted to OS by your brilliant sonnet, which 1iMom (whom I adore) has so graciously reproduced in her comment. I said to myself at the time: “Any forum that has writers like Shaggy is a forum I want to be part of.”

Thanks, Shags, for the great times. This is the best birthday party EVER!!!

Would it be considered rude to ask Blevins to bring along some extra H1N1 innocultations?

Happy Birthday Steve! One of OS's most talented and entertaining voices.

(I'll be manning the fridge, by the way - just leave the cake and the chips and all the booze with me....)

I'd come, but that tablecloth is too bright even for me. So...I guess there won't be any guinea-pig for the feast...

SURPRISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
oops, not him...

shaggy cant you share under the table? its big enough! or are you scared in the rush the table will get up-ended? that would be a pity, on account of it looks so pretty.

how thoughtful!

happy birthday, steve!

Happy Birthday Dr. Steve!

Awesome! Steve is one very funny guy! I just love his one liners. Pow! Every time.

I'm usually the last one to LEAVE a party...

(late arrival, but HBD, Steve!)

I say we all pool our adsense revenue and cover the tax for a plane ticket back to Florida so he can get what for.

What a wonderful party. I am so glad I came. I hope he likes the new Barbie I got him.

Steve, Happy Birthday!!!

Happy Birthday to the hilarious Dr. Steve. (that's funny about the dean, good luck with that)

How come I always miss the parties with the best decorations? Happy (belated) Birthday, Dr. Steve! I hope you didn't get ass-raped wherever you celebrated.

Happy Day!!!! ooooops. shhhh.

Well, I'm just glad I can say I knew you before you became an OS superstar. Hope you had a good one!