You and Me, Kids

Ruth Adar

Ruth Adar
San Leandro, California, USA
March 10
CoffeeShopRabbi on Twitter
Ruth Adar is a rabbi who teaches in the East Bay Area of California. She shares two grown sons and two rescue poodles with her partner, Linda.


Editor’s Pick
SEPTEMBER 29, 2010 4:20PM

Collateral Damage: When Queer Moms Come Out

photo taken at the Dyke March by Chris Ng

I came out in 1988, just after a rancorous divorce became final.  A very nice woman asked if I'd ever tried kissing another woman, and a few minutes later it was clear to me that… Read full post »

SEPTEMBER 28, 2010 8:31PM

Why Adult Children Come Home

I know it is fashionable among some baby-boomers to look askance at "the young people of today" but I have been heartsick lately watching the ones that I know.  This economy is cruel.

I have biological children (two of them, ages 26 and 28) and  a raft of informally adopted offspring. … Read full post »

SEPTEMBER 15, 2010 9:08PM

The Night of the Grown Up

"Is this like the TV?" one son asked me a few years ago. 

"Yes," I replied firmly.  "It is exactly like the TV."

 There had been a number of worrisome signs that he was severely depressed, and he was not happy about getting treatment for it.  He had… Read full post »

SEPTEMBER 14, 2010 9:34PM

Watching Commie TV


By tkksummers on flickr

Occasionally I see an advertisement for some product that promises to "Make Memories" for families.  In real life, though (not TV life, or Madison Avenue life) you can never know what events will combine to "make a memory" that the children will cherish. 

 Some… Read full post »

Our first lessons in parenting come from our parents.  Those of us who feel that our parents were unwise or unhappy often resolve to "get it right."

I was determined never to hit, never to shame, never to [fill in the blank].  I had a long list of things I… Read full post »

SEPTEMBER 11, 2010 3:39AM

Parenting Job 1: Get a Clue

Children do not ask to be born.  They are thrust into our lives by way of the delivery room, or the operating room, or a phone call from a social worker. Read full post »

SEPTEMBER 10, 2010 7:47PM

Not the Best Beginning

Other people's baby stories are boring.  What I want to tell is a mother story, about a woman who was convinced she'd be a bad mother.  I think I turned out OK, after all:  mothering has been my success in life.  I've raised two good men, guys I… Read full post »