Dear G.

You are the daughter that I never knew I wanted.  You are witty and charming, sweet and generous, loving and kind, intelligent and sensitive.  You are my little adventurer, always looking for more ways to be just who you are.  You are my little emotional extrovert, and although it drives me crazy at times, I can do nothing but love you with all of my being.

It makes me so proud when people notice how much like me you are, whether it is your temper or your sense of humor, or that you look so very much like me.   How could I have known how much I would want you, until you were already in my arms?  I would make you again in a heartbeat.  

People always commented on how close we were, how we did everything together.  We were inseparable.  But as you aged, it was inevitable that distance would grow between us and life would change us.  No matter how far you travel, no matter how much you change, you will always be my baby.  I wish only to cherish you.

When I discovered your presence, I was overwhelmed.  I was afraid and ashamed and angry.  I grieved for my youth.  From that utter isolation, I found such great joy--you.  I would not change a thing.  

I am sorry that your father and I do not see eye to eye.  I am saddened each time he disappoints you.  I want nothing more than for him to love you unconditionally, and to put you ahead of all things.  

When you were one year old, you and I went to stay with him at Camp LeJuene, North Carolina.  It was my brief moment of freedom.  I relish this time with you.  But I knew that I had to return to Pennsylvania, I had to finish college.  I knew that I had to choose between what your father wanted or needed, what you needed, and what I wanted or needed.  I knew it was best that you that I return to our roots in order for me to be the best role model for you.  Without an education, I would have had no chance to give you every potential in life, and I needed to show you what could be possible for you, so that you would know how and why to follow your own dreams.  Dream big.  Push hard.

I want the very best for you.  I am so excited to discover the person that you will grow into as you age.  You can be anything you choose, whether it is a doctor or an artist or a vet, or something else entirely.  It is all within you.

Just take what is inside of you and forget those things that make you afraid.  The naysayers are just angry that they are not as beautiful and smart and talented as you.  Ignore them and find yourself.  Accept nothing less.

Love your sister.  She can be your best friend.  She was there for every second of her life and she will be your family to the very end.  I made her just for you. 

You are my sun, moon, and stars.  

I love you best.  I loved you first.  I will love you always.  

Your mother