Consider this my "gratitude" list for today. I need to look at the positive things in my life right now.
I'm grateful for the strength I've found to take charge of my life. I've dropped more than 60 pounds in a year. I tried to make a lifestyle change in January 2011, but I wasn't really ready. I lost a little weight, but not a significant amount. While on vacation with my wife in October, I bought some shirts off the rack that should have fit me, but didn't. That's when I said, "If I lose 5 or 10 pounds, these should fit fine." That was 50 pounds ago. I've had to donate those shirts to a worthy cause because they hang on me like tents. I'm taking care of myself. Exercise. Proper diet. No alcohol.
I'm grateful for my friends. They've offered hugs, support and strength when I felt I was too weak to do what needed to be done.
I'm grateful for my Al-Anon friends and sponsor. They've really stepped up. As one of them told me, "You know the phone commercial with that army of people standing behind the one guy? That's us. We're behind you. All of us."
I'm grateful for my children. They are so wonderful and special. They need someone looking out for their interests. Sounds like I'm the guy for the job. They are a handful, but I'm up to the task.
I'm grateful for those on Open Salon who encouraged me to seek out Al-Anon in the first place.
I'm grateful for an understanding boss. He recently received his 29-year chip in Alcoholics Anonymous, so he knows what I'm going through. He's even offered to take me to some of his meetings so I can fulfill a requirement my sponsor has placed on me. In Al-Anon, we're encouraged to learn all we can about alcoholism and attend open AA meetings when we can. I haven't done that yet, but plan to do so when I have the time.
I'm grateful for this opportunity without the alcoholic in the home. It's giving me a better perspective on the situation and allowing me to have some quality time with my kids and my mother, who hasn't spent much time around her grandchildren until now. This week, she's offered to watch them while I work so I can save the $300 on childcare. With my wife's job once again in jeopardy due to drinking, money is about to become very tight.
That's all I have for now. This has been a trying week but today is a new day and I'm trying to start it out with a fresh perspective and positive attitude.