Really? They have the stereo system on a Country & Western station? Sigh. Whatever…
Mid-song, I have no idea who or what this is, but some chick just sang about heading off to “Wally World.”
God I hate that stupid nickname. Overused. Just like Mickey D’s for McDonald’s. No matter how cute you think it sounds, I still don’t want to eat there. I don’t hate Target pronounced as “tar-jhay”. Nor do I use that in my vocabulary, but it’s kind of funny, I suppose. Although it’s been around for a while…I remember the first time I heard that from Karen when I worked at the Phone Company…
“Smalltown USA”
Well that sounds good. I wonder what kind of car I would drive if I lived there. The Eclipse probably wouldn’t cut it—Oooh, I know! A Jeep, for sure. Geez, it reminds me of Julia Roberts in “Sleeping with the Enemy”—she’s living in this spacious luxury mansion by the freakin’ beach and gets plopped into the middle of a hoedown or something. Like the witness protection program. That could be cool. Maybe I could work at a roadside ice cream stand and wear cut-offs and tank tops all the time. What would I do in the winter months though? I mean, aren’t ice cream stands seasonal? Weird that we don’t really have those in Arizona. Sure there’s Cold Stone Creamery, but that lacks the character and charm of anything “roadside”…Another Roadside Attraction—wasn’t that a Tom Robbins book?
“Boot Scootin’ Boogie”
I wannna put on, mah-mah-mah-mah-my boogie shoes…Dirk Diggler…”I got a pair of brand new roller skates…” I miss roller-blading on Kelly Drive. If I still lived in Philly I could go hang out with Sally Swift. She said Serendipity was still open down on South Street. I had grilled octopus there once…it was really good…and spicy… Mmmmm…I think I met a fireman there one night. Did he call? Ha! He totally called! At like 2am, hours after I had left—he was drunk and never called me again. Good thing. If I lived in Philly I could take the train to NY…or Jersey, right? Duaneart lives in Jersey…and they have beaches there. I could be on a beach right now…
I don’t know what song this is, but the guitar sounds like “Hard Luck Woman” by KISS. I wish I still had my KISS Army t-shirt. I’d wear it like nobody’s business. I love Gene Simmons—not that he’s really cute or anything, Paul was the cute one…I’ll never forget meeting him with Holly at the Marriott, but Gene is a wicked bass player. Rock Band—“I’m gonna go Gene Simmons on your ass”…ha ha ha ha…
Some guy singing “I wanna kiss a girl”
So do it, already! Wait. Okay. I wanna kiss a guy, how ‘bout that? But not some random dude—that would be weird. There’s a guy maintenance-ing (made up word—ha ha) the pool—is he cute? Nah. If he was I might flirt with him. No I wouldn’t. I look gross—all “sweat pooling in my belly button” and crazy hair piled on my head. Yes I would. Well, whatever.
Camel Country 108 FM!
Camel toe. Gross.
Commercials:
FOX has my Friday night “fun” all figured out?
Brothers-- a new comedy!
Blah blah blah..sounds dumb.
Dollhouse returns!
Ooooh, Eliza Dushku will be on? Never watched that show, but heard about it...I can’t remember if I thought it was good or not. Eliza Dushku though? I remember thinking she was hot at some point. Was she on Buffy? Yeah, I think so.
Now Trader Joe’s wants me to make pancakes, claiming it’s a Fall tradition. I had no idea. And only $1.99 for a box of pancake mix. Wonder how much it would be over at “Wally World”???
Nesquick bunny says I’m dreaming about him. Great. I hope that doesn’t get stuck in the sub-conscious. Fucking like rabbits. Chocolatey milk rabbits? Oh no, I’ve done it to myself...
Fat Lady is gonna sing at Avondale Dodge so I better hurry the fuck down to buy a vehicle. ASAFP. Sounds urgent. Do they kill the fat lady after she sings?
Damn, it’s freakin’ HOT! This is probably what a slice of cheese feels like atop a burger on the grill. Getting in the pool now…
Good grief! It must be getting cooler here overnight—COLD COLD water! Best guess, less than 70 degrees. Holy crap! Oh nice, I get out with rock hard nipples just as a group of guys are walking by. No, I am not “pointing” at you—move along. Bad day to wear the white bikini.
Back to the music.
“God is great, beer is good and people are crazy”
Really? Those can’t be the right words, but what else could it be? Bear? Oh, here it comes again…Yup. Well, amen to that. “Them there are the facts, little lady.” Too early for beer though. Or not. Sheryl Crow was drinking beer at noon on Tuesday…in a bar that faces a giant carwash.
Jo Dee Messina* here on the Camel.
Damn, I was hoping it would be a man. I always liked the name Jody for a guy. And Tracy. And Kelly. I used to date a guy named Kelly. He turned out to be a total douchebag. Ha! I remember Chris Kelly skateboarding down Hollywood Boulevard and even better, the time I colored his hair fuchsia and he ended up ruining the white sheets on his parents’ bed that we passed out on. Oh and the time he wanted me to pierce his belly button. What was that—1991? What a trailblazer for pierced rockers everywhere…
More commercials.
Damn how many commercials do they have? Oh, here’s a text from Land Ho. It’s like a chain letter text about a pumpkin moon or something. Yeah, I got your MOON right here. Wonder if the pool guy would take a picture of my ass for me. I better go home now… Got things to do…
*I admit I had to look that one up for the proper spelling, but I drew the line at looking up the playlist for this station and you’ll get no apologies from me for that. Sorry.
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Comments
Rated
Sometimes I hate that I think too much, but I'm glad you liked. If it lends anything to his, I talk fast too...
littlewillie:
{head slamming shut until next time} seriously, always a pleasure to have you stop by.
fins2theleft:
Yeah, it gave me plenty of tangents to go off on!
rice paddie:
yeah, sometimes it's the simple things. I may do a whole series of these...stay tuned...
Steve Blevins:
Try as I might, I simply cannot. turn. off. my. brain. Sorry it's creating such a ruckus for you--how do you think I feel?
The "I Wanna Kiss A Girl" is Keith Urban who is an Australian country singer that just happens to be married to fellow Aussie, Nicole Kidman. Girls get all drippy over him plus he's a wicked guitar player. Google him You'll melt.
That's all the country info I can give you for now. Don't want to over do it, ya know.
Funny, I have similar internal dialogue with myself (hardly as interesting as yours.) , but I never thought of ever writing any of it down. Very entertaining!
White bikini babes are hot. Philly chicks are hot. Arizona chicks are far.
In Jersey we call it going down the shore - even if your heading due East.
Camel Toe - fascinating.
You gotta really look hard to find a CW station on NJ/NY radio. I have no idea what they listen to in Philly.
My house to Philly - 1 hr. 50 min. Finding you there - priceless.
my inner dialogue - thanks
Holy moly! No idea how you translated my ravings to find that info, but thanks! Mmmm...Keith Urban....
Duane: XOXOXOXO
Cindy Ross: Please tell me you have Strawberry Short Kook? That's my favorite. And no sunburn here--SPF 45 today.
A lot!! They have to pay the bills though!!! ;)
Loved this, and you oh tiny one.
I'm still debating whether to go marinate at the pool again today. I'll have to look for other "flavors" of sunblock.
emma:
I think the tuner for the system is in the office or lobby of the complex (yes, the photo is the actual pool I go to) and I am too lazy to go wandering to figure it out.
Rod:
Hope it wasn't too crowded in there!
Tink:
The commercials were really weird--I mean, "Nesquick"? really? WTF? They have way better commercials on the local hip-hop station--condoms, plastic surgery, lawyers, etc. Wait. Hmmm....
Buffy:
I would love to have your company at the pool! But, please, no more C&W...My achy, breaky heart can't take anymore.
Patrick:
I am curious about this "fucktardalicious" food...nice made-up word!
Caroline:
Next time, change the station, will ya? And bring beer.
Caroline: ;-)
Owl: LOL--"thought parade"...that's awesome!
patrick: Magically delicious? Ok.
surly: it's yet another of my ridiculous, useless talents?
For some of us---it never goes away. I suspect you might be in that club!
Next time I'm in Arizona I'll have to see if I can spot your mind (... get it? spotted mind? spot your mind?... sigh.)
The secret to true happiness is recognizing that at every point in every day it is after 4:00PM and it's happy hour somewhere in the world. In Arizona, for instance if it's 11:00 AM it's 6:00 PM in London England. And that's a very big city with lots of people who drink more than their fair share of beer (and wine... but that's for the snobs.) Just think how put out they'd be if you didn't join them.
Furious.
Chicago Guy: Oh yes, and I will be insane from it someday--best to let it out...
Chris Brown: Yes sir, I do recognize the happy hours all over the world! Cheers!
fireeyes: Thanks! Glad I gave you a chuckle!
Entertaining post.
Noni: Oh, I do talk out loud to myself, but it's not as coherent...
GJI: Wow! You're easy to please. Duly noted.
Me? Prude? Oh you know better...it's ON, bitches. ;-)
xoxoxo