I was talking with my mom a few weeks ago about my life philosophies and how they are being highlighted lately. Just thought I'd share them. You're invited to comment on them, add to them or let me know if you share them too.
I'm going to do this in parts because I feel loquacious about it all and I think the explanation will be helpful. :)
1. Be Authentic I learned this one a few years ago after I dumped my then-boyfriend. It was a long and painful relationship. We met when I was 17 and he was 16 and stayed together for almost 10 years. That is a really long time when you start that young and it is even longer when plagued with abuse and infidelity. To this day, I don't know why I stayed. But I think that is a post for another day.
I thought about who I was as a person and what it was doing for me. Then I looked at the consequences of who I was and what I did. I didn't like it. I was lying to myself and to everyone around me. I had learned so well to bury my own wants, needs and desires to protect myself, that I lied to everyone. And I lied to me. I think that was the hardest part of it all; that I had been lying to myself.
So to stop the lying and try and figure out just what I want and in a way, who I am, I started to work on being authentic. I asked myself, often, if what I said truly reflected how I felt, what I thought, what I needed, who I was.
Quickly things started to change for me. People were more open and I was happier. Situations moved smother and I was able to avoid ones that could become explosive.
Being and living authentically changed many things in my life. I'm closer to being the person I want to be and I'm miles away from the girl who left a terrible relationship three years ago.
Part 2 t0 come soon
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Aunt Mabel
Leslie Basden
odetteroulette
john blumenthal
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Comments
Of course you are helping yourself too, since you can now pursue your true happiness and filter out people who don't want the real you to be happy just by being yourself and letting folks like you or not as they wish.
Congratulations on reaching this major insight before losing out on a huge piece of your life. I look forward to reading other insights you have had and seeing if they are as strong as this one.
Age is a strange thing. Sometimes I believe we have two ages - chronological and animalogical.
O'Really - I still fall for imposters too. It's not easy to spot the fakers all the time. But as long as our eyes are open, we'll be safer than being blind.
neilpaul - That is a pretty high bar to set for me. :) I know that my philosophy works for me. And if I can help out someone else, that makes it all the more powerful.
trig - come one, you're not that old? you seem so young at heart. There is that animalogical age thing again. :)
JK Brady - Thank you for reminding me to watch the horizon and not to be swayed by the waves. It seems lately, and today especially, that the waves are high. Tomorrow the seas may be calmer.
cindy - the answers are there if you look. I hope that people will start to look more within themselves. An authentic world could be amazing. Sometimes we don't know why we do things - think I've figured out why, but that is for another post. :)
tai - It totally is a lifelong process. And it is a huge part of the human experience. Kind of makes it exciting to be around.
There is more to come, so stay tuned!