I visited my doctor last week to talk to him about my smoking. After our heart to heart, I decided to switch to Lucky Strike. The toasted taste really enhances the pleasure I get from my hobby. It's less irritating than the non-toasted tobaccos.

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My ex used to poke fun at my hobby.  "Sitting and smoking ain't a hobby," she'd say. There's a lot more to it. Like this image. I studied computer-manipulated imagery to create it. I made it into a blacklight poster and sell it from a kiosk at the mall, along with belt buckles with tobacco leaf designs.

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Smoking is a very social hobby. Met these three guys outside the gas station. They'd forgotten their IDs, so I had to make the purchase.

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My hobby allows me to get out of the office on those cabin-fever days and catch up with my buddy Forrest. We communicate with nature on our breaks.

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Forrest still smokes filtered cigarettes. I told him what my doctor said about Lucky Strike, but he's not budging.

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The anti-smoking crowd says cigarettes take away from intimacy. Untrue. Forrest seems to be getting along great with his wife, Beatrice.

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Now if only I find a woman like Beatrice, my life will be complete. I can see us on a beach, like these happy hobbyists.