Wrapping up last night's ABC News's World News Tonight (or whatever they call Diane Sawyer's show), a middle-aged reporter inteviewed a middle-aged author and a middle-aged doctor to tell us that our brains peak during middle-age.  More specifically, memory peaks at 45.  Vocabulary peaks be… Read full post »

Hello, dear reader.  I attempted to buy a desktop from HP.  Things did not go well.  Below is a copy of the email I sent through HP's website that goes to CEO Meg Whitman.  As if anyone believes Meg will ever read it.

Dear Ms. Whitman,

I am writing in… Read full post »

For those who took a quick glance, yes, today is my birthday.  Thanks for the good wishes.

Here are a few more who came into the world on the 9th of January.  Since I'm writing this from work, sorry, no photos.

Lady "Jennie" Jerome Churchill (b. 1854) - Mother of Winston… Read full post »

To see 2013.

Happy New Year. Read full post »

Seriously, all I want for the New Year is to find the toaster.  Either or both of our printers would be a bonus.

Ms. Stim and I moved the Tuesday before Christmas a whole half-mile east  of our previous local.  The key difference being that we left an older apartment we'd… Read full post »

"... oh, what a laugh it would have been, if Daddy had only seen Mommy kissing Santa Claus last night."

Lubbock TX --  Santa Claus was shot dead by a jealous husband late Saturday night in a double murder.  William Joseph Courouge, 38, has been charged by police with the murder… Read full post »

CHICAGO, IL -- Mr. Santa Clause of an unincorporated northern address was arrested Thursday night on charges of solicitation of prostitution.  The police report states that Mr. Clause was driving "an unusual animal-powered vehicle" in a well-known red light district.  Witnesses report that… Read full post »

In the spirit of  "If you haven't seen it, it's new to you," this is a repost of  an early "effort" of mine from 2008.  Three kind people gave it the monkey thumb.  No one left a comment.

Please stop sending little Christmas cookies to the office.  Please.  Y… Read full post »

Dear Holiday Message Recipient,

Another year has come and nearly gone.  We at the Stim household hope this message finds you and yours well.

As with every year, 2011 has been an eventful time for our family.

Our three kitties each became the face of a major brand of cat food,… Read full post »

In the news:

Dog takes revenge on hunter for making the dog jump into cold water to retrieve dead ducks.  Dog also had complained numerous times of chipping his teeth on shotgun pellets lodged in said dead ducks.  Expect the NRA to issue a statement defending the dog's Second Amendment righ… Read full post »

You gotta be kidding.

One Personal, Sweeping Thought:  I think I'm kinda depressed, which likely explains the crap to come below.  Usually I have a healthy pessimistic outlook:  Expect the worst and you'll never be disappointed.

I suppose the title should properly read "The State of Stim."  I simp… Read full post »

How could I know?  They seemed so innocent.

We live on the third floor, the top floor.  The front door to our six-flat building is locked.  The kids, the trick-or-treaters, never ring our buzzer.  We don't bother buying candy.

At dusk the buzzer rang.  The cats sprung of… Read full post »

[This post was inspired by Jonathan Wolfman's post Jesus H Christ -- H? -- Where'd That Come From If you haven't read Jonathan's post, please read and rate it.  If you have read it, it's worth a repeat reading.]

Hank.  Jesus Hank Christ.

"Jesus" was a very popular name back in… Read full post »

These past two Chicago mornings I woke to grey skies, intermittent rain and local high wind warnings with possible gusts of 60 mph.  Facing such conditions I'm sure our long-gone ancestors would make the decision to stay in their caves, toss more wood on the fire, gnaw on some mastodon leftovers… Read full post »

In response to Whoreville Redendcocker's Open Call to list the 20 people you would cram around a card table in your studio apartment in order for all of them, and you, to dine on take-out Chinese ---

The Guest List

Oscar Wilde

Mark Twain

18 mutes.

I want to listen to Wilde and Twa… Read full post »

As I walked to the bus this morning for my ride to the Loop and another work week, these lyrics from Pink Floyd's "Time" were going through my head:

"And you run and you run to catch up with the sun, but it's sinking.  Racing around to come up behind you… Read full post »

The memo is so boring, it's brain damaging.  A temporal anomaly sucking away conscious minutes while stretching hours to interminable length.  I swear my mind has taken extra-dimensional journeys because there's nothing for it to do while I sit and stare.  For days -- has it been… Read full post »

Come to me, my love.

I lift you high above to

Spread upon my face.

Some things need to be written about.  These are not those things.

When was the last time a postal worker went postal?  In the heyday, there was a shootup every other week.  What happened?  Did a couple of those first-class stamp price increases go towards paying for group therapy… Read full post »

As mentioned in the previous post, The Huffington Post interviewed Ms. Stim about our trip to France.  The French village of Le Cardonnois unveiled a memorial honoring Ms. Stim's father along with the nine other crewmen whose B-17 was shot down over occupied France on February 8, 1944.  Rep… Read full post »

The Land of Liquid Time is a beautiful place.  Alarm clocks don't work there.  Deadlines are forbidden.  You sit, you walk, explore, meditate, delve, vegetate, see old friends, meet new people, get involved in your community, read a book, go to a museum, go to a movie, go to to a… Read full post »

Not wanting to be out-apocalypsed by some pagan Mayan prediction for 2012, Harold Camping jumped in to get a head start on The End.  Camping, president of the Family Radio Christian network, predicts The Rapture will occur May 21, 2011.  That’s right, you have one month to get right w… Read full post »

The big, big company reorganized my job out from under me today.  My former department was going one way and that way didn't include the work I did for them.  Instead they want to hire someone who can do the work that the department will be doing and they want that… Read full post »

I was fiddling around on Google during the wee hours and decided to search for Pamela Jean Bryant.  Who?  Pamela Jean Bryant was, in a singular way, a significant woman in my life.  She was the Playmate of the Month for April, 1978.  She also was the first… Read full post »