During the night an army of microscopic vikings plundered my face, leaving little red marks as remnants of their war. They used my eye lids as a battlefield, and clearly shot canons under my eyes. They dug trenches around my mouth to hide from their enemies. They It's the only logical explanation for how I look right now.
It's Friday, which is casual day. For the rest of the world this is a happy occasion involving Hawaiian Shirts, and possibly a fashion statement for the brave. I feel like wearing a giant burlap sack over a burka. All things considered, I think this outfit would suit me well.
My hair looks like this, but instead of featuring a radical growling bear weave, I'm sporting one giant tangle that looks like a single dreadlock.
Oh, and to complete the look shampoo dripped into my eye in the shower. I hate today.